I am very sick, but I don’t get PTO or sick days. I have no choice but to go into work, so I wear a mask, sanitize, and distance myself to protect others.

I grabbed a coffee before work because I didn’t have the energy to make one myself. The person behind me in line made a comment about me being a “paranoid government puppet”.

Like MADAME, I am protecting YOU and your family. I am not doing it for myself. I’m doing it for the people who are immunocompromised, people who are looking forward to vacation, those who can’t take time off work. mind your effing business

It's all in the title. He dumped me yesterday. Because I said I was worried about him. Like in general. Like people say when they care about you. Oh you're sick, I'm worried about you, I hope you do better. He lost it. Said he didn't need someone to get on his nerves right now that he was "setting me free" so I didn't have to worry anymore. That he could do whatever he wanted. I just texted back "OK" like man what do you want me to do or say. You broke up on the spot via text for the stupidest shit ever lol. He kept texting just to tell me I wasn't to text him again because he won't change his mind. To which I said again "OK". He kept going for a while saying I should never contact him again. That he could give my gift back if I wanted to. I said no. He said OK. I didn't even open his text lol. I'm flabbergasted lmao. That is all. Just wanted to vent my frustration about it.

I genuinely don't understand why people get so weird when someone takes their privacy seriously.

I recently mentioned that I use different phone numbers and emails for online shopping, car dealerships, and random websites, and someone immediately started questioning why I'd need so many numbers. Seriously since when did not wanting strangers to have my personal information become suspicious?

I use masked cloaked numbers and emails for some worthless online bull, but apparently that's enough to make people think I'm hiding some secret double life. I'm just tired of giving my actual number to businesses that have absolutely no reason to contact me outside of one transaction. And I'm even more tired of having to explain myself for it.

The whole "if you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to worry about" mentality is exhausting. I close my curtains at night too, doesn't mean I'm running a criminal empire in my kitchen. I just want some control over who can contact me without being treated like a suspicious person.

Didn't realize that was such a controversial thing to want.

So to start, this is not me saying my friends are treating me poorly in any way, it's probably more self projection than anything. Basically I'm 30 almost 31, I have no kids and don't plan to have any anytime soon, my partner and I have been together for 8 years and plan to elope nothing big.

This past year more of my friends and family have been getting married and having children and I started to notice it with my family, but I was not being included in small family get togethers and would see posts on social media. I didn't take it to heart at first because I work a lot and it was mostly the families with kids getting together. Then I started noticing my uncles, aunts, and my grandmother also going to some of these gatherings as well with no invite to me or my partner. When my sister has my amazing niece and nephew it got a little better because she always includes me even when I don't have a kid, and I have a great relationship with my niece and nephew.

When I am a part of these gatherings the only thing people will ask me about or talk to me about are prospective plans to get married or when me and my boyfriend are going to have children. This is not my main life goal, I'm really successful in my career, we have our own apartment, cats, I work on my art and crafts, and I have a lot more to offer than producing babies.

Well my best friend in the world just shared she is pregnant. I am so happy for her and cried when she told me because she will be an amazing mom. I'm just scared now that I might be left out in that part of my life now too because her two other best friends have kids of their own. I will be the weird childless aunt who is deems scared of children and immature. For some reason my cousins make it seem like I'm scared of children and babies. Which is so far from the truth. I love kids so much and do want to have some of my own one day, and I also worked in a daycare. I take my niece and nephew for the weekends all the time. But somehow I'm still perceived in a weird way.

I just don't want my last close friend to leave me behind too :(

I was already feeling sad about my life all in all, suddenly an orange and white cat was sitting outside my window and meowing for food.

Mom was concerned that we would be scratched, my younger sister went out to check on the cat, then I ended up checking on the cat too. Turns out my sister was holding onto one of our dogs because of how stressed the dog was about the cat.

I took a gamble and picked the cat up, I think it was an adolescent cat. But it was so sweet. I carried him like a baby and he was purring.

But I couldn't keep the cat. My parents hate cats and our dogs do kill animals.

Before my sister took the initiative to give the cat away to trusted neighbors, I told the kitty my goodbyes. That I want to see him in another life and that he lives a good life. He was really loving, he loved it when I scratched his cheeks.

I feel like my entire life is a fucking joke. Born a girl in a family of 6 older brothers, where a girl is literally the WORST thing to be and my mom didnt like girls so that gave me a great start and great self esteem and sense of belonging. Was told I was infertile by doctors my whole life because my hormones were jacked up and they refused to give me birth control. didnt want kids until I got pregnant by the biggest fucking clown I've ever met in my life. Got a very emotionally heavy customer service job as an audhd. I hate the job. They somehow will not fire me. I cannot quit. We are trying for a second kid and now I cannot get pregnant and will literally start my fucking period three days after a positive ovulation test.

We make a decent combined income but are still living paycheck to paycheck

Fuck. My. Life.

Ok, so not EVERYTHING. But everything you think i dont kind of thing. However, because i know everything/enough, incase deletes do happen, I find it completely hysterical that they make such hypocritical posts. Comments during life. Like, as an example, sharing a meme on fb about how disappointing it is that people stay so comfortable in their own minds and zones, no growth... and yet, they themselves dont see their own flaws in that... they still prefer "their world their way"... or like hearing someone say "that's not very Christian of you" when they themselves are planning to commit 4 sins in the next hour. Then repeat it every few hours. Then that whole cycle every day...

I really love the feeling of having someone you truly love and care for and feel like they are the one till suddenly something happens and it makes everything before disappear and realize they never liked you and never cared for you as much as you did for them, man. Feeling loved and cared for is nice. Having someone you can be yourself with is nicer. Im sad very sad. I hope everyone have a good day though.

I’m 23 years old and still have yet to graduate from college or get a full-time job. I should’ve graduated over 2 years ago and yet here I am still trying.

Failure after failure. Attempt after attempt. Money gone down the drain. Time wasted. All due to countless reasons and excuses. Poor study methods, distractions from problems like my father dying from pneumonia whilst hospitalized for cancer after my 1st year in college( literally the only person close to me who actually cared about me but couldn’t do much once his cancer got worse), my schizophrenic mother making life harder than it has to be, a lot more errands than I’d assumed like handling official documents which was tough due to the government handling them being pretty corrupt and the only person who regularly helped us permanently leaving without notice which took a long time to find a replacement.

I just completed 2 exams for this year. I probably won’t pass one. Don’t know about another. The college graduation requirements seem kind of confusing according to the handbook. One rule claiming a certain number of credits is enough to graduate. Another saying it’s not enough.

After only 2 months, I’ll know what’s in store for me… By then, I’ll be close to turning 24…

I (F24) don't feel calm whenever I'm at home. I've graduated from college this year and still haven't found work so I'm still living with my parents.

I've struggled with low self-worth and stress for a long while due to my parents. Like how I used to draw anime when I was in highschool and that I didn't take my parents suggestions into not drawing anime stuff to grow my skills as an artist; or how I play online with friends often instead of homework and studying enough for high grades.

As I've grown and lost my internet friend group of 9 years, If I'm going to be all alone crying, feeling so miserable, and have terrible headaches from the smallest of stresses, I wish this house would be so quiet for me to calm down. I've been sleeping all day lately and I'm starting to lose the want to go out and do stuff. Even eating meals feels tiring. I just... I keep getting so stressed out that I just want to sleep.

I just want to not interact with anyone. I don't want to hear anyone. It's weird but I don't want to go outside either. I don't even want to draw for now. I'm not sure how to handle this. I can't wallow in this for long but God I am fucking tired of being so stressed out and being attacked constantly with headaches from small stresses.

I’ve been writing and rewriting this post a lot over a couple of days so I apologize if this comes out as a hefty stream of consciousness.

I have a really big issue with envy to be honest. It fluctuates depending on the person and situation, but it’s genuinely exhausting. My problem these days is with one of my closest friends.

I moved to a different city for a job opportunity about two years ago. I barely knew anybody in this new city, and I was still navigating it all. After a couple of weeks of working at the new job, he started working there as well.

I don’t struggle making friends, and I always blend in easily and socialize, I guess I’m a likable person and I try my best to make people feel seen and heard. We became friends almost immediately. He’s 12 years older than me, so I found myself always seeking his advice and picking his brain about stuff.

Over time we became closer and closer, he introduced me to his friends and family, I became close with all of them, and they consider me to be part of the family. His mother keeps calling me her second son.

He’s charming, supportive, funny, always available, navigates problems so easily, very confident, extremely helpful and hardworking.

I could go on for days on all the ways he’s perfect, inside and out.

He’s very good looking, soft hair, enchanting smile in a way that is inviting and warm, very handsome and physically fit, he could put a trash bag on and it would look good on him.

He has the most perfect family; loving, supportive, always there.

He’s got an amazing work ethic, and can problem solve to oblivion.

He’s very confident and self assured, sensitive and empathetic.

All women love him and want him, wherever we go they keep checking him out, and he gets in relationships so easily and very gracefully.

Ever since we became friends, he’s always been there for me, always provided advice and a helping hand. I never really felt lonely in the city or like a stranger. He provided a very safe space for me to vent and talk about anything without any judgement. He corrects me when I make mistakes and makes it a point for me to be better.

I, on the other hand, am short, frumpy, fat, ugly with a big nose and glasses.

I’m still a virgin at 24, and I keep getting rejected over and over to the point where it’s humiliating. I keep trying so hard and keep failing even harder. A girl once told me that I was too fat and ugly to be talking to her, and another once genuinely laughed at me for approaching her.

I never really felt confident in my body or my looks, I’ve never been confident all around. I try hard to dress well, and I’ve been hitting the gym consistently lately but I’m still the same ugly slab of meat. I hate looking in the mirror and I don’t like the way I look in pictures.

It took me so much time to realize that I might have a likable personality, and I still have a hard time believing that people actually like me.

I envy my friend so hard, he’s literally a perfect human being all around. I just wish that I could swap lives with him for a day, just so I can see what it’s like.

I put in four times as much effort just to look mediocre at best, while he simply wakes up perfect.

I know I’m not jealous, I’m genuinely happy for him and wish him all the best, but why can’t I be like him? Why am I stuck in this lumpy hideous body?

It physically hurts me thinking about how much I’m missing out on just because I’m so frumpy unattractive and unconfident.

I look up to him so much and want to be like him in every single way imaginable.

I keep comparing myself to him and I’m nowhere near and I don’t think I’ll ever be even close.

It’s really hard form not to feel unlovable and extremely unwanted right now, and that’s something I’ve been struggling with all my life.

I feel very isolated and in my head with no way out, and I’m intensely aware of how rejected and insignificant I am.

How can I not envy him when I see him everyday, we hang out every day, and all my friends are either related to him or close friends with him? I fear this might turn to jealousy and develop to resentment and maybe hatred.

Is there a way out of these feelings or am I doomed to stay like this for all of eternity?

So I'm trying to build a platform/audience on tiktok, like a submissions-based thing where people sends me submissions and I post them and I'm trying to build an audience for that. The idea behind it is if the page grows into something huge, then if someone submits something, it'll be seen by a lot of people, helping them get seen and heard and boosting their own following. Think of it like an artists' showcase or artists' spotlight. But I've had someone accuse me of trying to get big so people will trust me enough to send submissions so I can get big from the content people sends me. I've also had people assume I'm a scammer or accuse me of being sus. But how is what I'm doing any different than a radio program with a lot of listeners featuring new recording artists to help them get new listeners for their music? This was just an idea I had that I thought sounded good and I liked the idea of it. I also wanted to turn this idea into a podcast. Would it be any different if this idea was a podcast instead rather than a social media page or if it started as a podcast first instead of a page on tiktok?

I feel really stupid.

I tried hypnotherapy for the first time today. Spent $350 on it, and honestly? It didn't fucking work.

It's not even that I went into it expecting some magical overnight transformation. I'd done my research, had certain expectations about how the session would go, and it ended up being pretty much exactly what I was afraid it might be.

I've been going to therapy and taking antidepressants for years. I've tried so many things, and nothing has really helped the way I desperately want it to. I guess I was hoping this would be different. At some point, I think I started seeing it as one of my last options.

And now I'm sitting here feeling like a fucking idiot for spending that much money on something that didn't work.

Like, why did I even think this would help? Was I seriously that desperate? Apparently, I was.

I don't know. I'm just really frustrated with myself and with the whole situation. I wanted something to work so badly that I think I let myself get my hopes up again, and now I feel stupid for it. Might just stop therapy and antidepressants altogether now lol. Nothing helps. I'm tired of waiting and trying every day.

Anyway, I don't really know what I'm looking for by posting this. I guess I just wanted to get it out of my system and talk to someone for a bit.

I feel like my constant rumination keeps me living in the past and it has severely stunted me as far as getting my life together and working on myself and my career path.
I can’t help or control it and it is crippling.

I can’t help but ruminate and compare myself to everyone I know or used to know when I do it. I feel like all of my peers have far exceeded me in every way and the worst part is, I feel like I have given everything I have to trying to better my life and make the most of every opportunity that I can find.

Everyday i wonder how much better my life would’ve been, had not been born into my family. I hate every aspect of living, because i’ll never be true to it. My family is muslim, and half assed on religion, i’ve never followed it. But everyday i shuffle myself around in a hijab and am fully covered. My hairline is receding at only 18 years old since i’ve been wearing this for almost 10 years. But i also know that if i stop practicing, my family will cut me off fully,and i don’t know if I’m ready for that.
I have no goals in life since i cant persue art or music, my friends are moving on with life and i just feel disconnected. No matter what i support or believe everyone will see my identity as muslim and have their own bias.
I’m scared of continuing living like a coward but i’m scared of losing all support from my close friends and family.Everyday i just stare and curate my pinterest feed, looking at the “what-ifs” in my imagination.
My parents aren’t evill or anything, but i know they’d draw the line or call me a slut or something. It doesn’t help that for the longest i’ve been the “normal one”, due to my other two siblings have their own mental issues and whatnot, so sometimes i can tell they expect me to be normal, and get married and practice islam eventually.

Everyday i’ve just been anxious about it all, just dreaming about a life where i don’t worry if im showing too much of my ankles, or if this cloth drapes me in a way that’s sinful.I want to let my hair breath and not be seen as my religion first , but me as a person.

I can't even fathom anymore what the problem with me is. I despise being in this place. I hate having to wake up and do the same routine every single day. I hate people, myself, the world – everything that happens and goes on like there's some kind of meaning behind anything of it all. I'm so fed up of being conscious. Fed up of thinking, feeling and acting like a normal person, when really all I am is filled with such anger and revulsion. There's nothing that helps. There's nothing that works. I'm just sitting here deteriorating, watching the days pass by me wondering what the fuck I'm even here for.

this is my second and final year of attending high school, at first i hung out with people i didnt really like for the sake of not being a loner again, but after a couple months i started enjoying some of their company. a few months later i found myself becoming best friends with a girl from that friend group, and she eventually introduced me to a friend of hers, who is now my boyfriend of almost 6 months.

this “best friend” of mine was never really someone i actually felt connected to, she was simply someone i hung out with very often so we figured we might as well be called best buddies. shes someone ive always felt like i needed to impress for her to like me, i always thought “what would she do in this situation” and what she would do, i tried to do too. idk why it feels like i always wanted her approval, i didnt even like her. she would overreact to literally anything, always looking for reasons to argue with someone, always talked trash about so many people behind their backs. thats not someone id like to be approved of or be like… maybe i was js afraid of having no friends again.

at the start of this school year i noticed that me and that “best friend” started growing apart because she was hanging out more with another friend of hers 1 on 1. we wouldnt hang out outside of school for weeks, wouldnt call each other for days. i didnt mind honestly, matter of fact it gave me more time and space for myself which made me happy considering that lately her presence tired and irritated me.

2 days ago we had a small argument in a 3 person gc which i left when she started pissing me off, then she texted me “whenever u have a problem with someone do u js leave from group chats?” she was referring to a similar situation from about a month ago, basically her other best friend posed very weirdly in a picture w my boyfriend, at her party that i wasnt invited to, and since i found out about that very disrespectful picture weeks after that party i figured it wasnt worth arguing over with her so i simply left a gc we had with us three.

i replied to the “best friend’s” message with “i dont know if youve realised, but i dont really enjoy ur guys’ company anymore. im not asking to solve any issues between us, i simply want to stop being friends” word for word. she demanded an explanation which i promised to give her later that day because i was very busy and couldnt talk at that moment. she called me a total of 7 times which i ignored because she didnt respect the fact that i couldnt talk at the moment. later on i explained why i didnt wanna be friends with her in a paragraph via text, she was mad over the fact that i didnt want to call and told me “i only look for reasons to argue with people who have the guts to pick up the phone” and i honestly just pulled out the thumbs up emoji to make her piss off already👍

it was official. we werent friends anymore and i was SO relieved. she removed me from instagram and tiktok which i didnt care much about. then i got into a small argument with my boyfriend, he said that the explanation i gave her wasnt enough and he demanded that i talk to her in person which i denied over and over again. thats what got me stressing at first, he literally almost got mad at me for not giving her a further explanation. i started worrying that shes gonna get into his head like she does with everyone, and then hes gonna break up with me. i talked to him about it and he reassured me many times that nothing was gonna change between me and him, it relieved me.

rn im worried about how things are going to be at school, i will have pretty much no people to hang out with at school bc we both shared the same friend groups so obviously im gonna back off. besides that, my boyfriend and her share a few mutual friends, and im worried that if her friends take her side then my boyfriend’s friends will think of me as someone unlikeable. i trust him quite a lot and hes already reassured me that nothing about us will change tho i cant help but be anxious about it

Everyone around me is in a relationship.. all my friends, family, co-workers.. I try to put myself out there but I feel like theres something horribly wrong with me. I some get matches but they lead to no where, I feel so alone and hopeless. I guess im just needing to get this out of my system but its just really been eating at me. Im tired of feeling this lonely all the time. I just wish I could find love like everyone around me has.. I try so hard to act like its not bothering me so I dont bother the people im with, but it just keeps digging at me and makes me feel so lonely.. I just miss having a 1-to-1 unique connection that I have with someone special.. i miss having those loving moments cuddled up and enjoying movies.. i miss love....

Unfortunately I live in Florida so I mostly see right wing political ads, damn near every day. These mfers are just straight up lying 90% of the time in these ads and it's utterly sickening. They make strawman arguments, put words in people's mouths that they NEVER said and never ever actually talk about what they'll actually do for people, nope it's always an ad hominem attack on someone else's character.

I know the GOP doesn't give a damn about telling the damn truth at the best of times but you'd think the TV stations or websites would have the right to refuse to air ads with straight up lies. They're just as complicit, and it's not even solely "right-wing" sites/stations either.

It's so goddamn frustrating as someone who values truth and fairness.

Ok, this happened a few days ago and it's been irritating me. I was out and waiting in a line for some food in my local malls food court with a friend, when I heard this group of broccoli haired guys whispering and giggling.

I had a hunch it was about me, because I'm a big person and I'm unfortunately used to being made fun of. The friend I was with confirmed my suspicion afterwards and said they were pointing at me and it really upset me. In my mind, I'm not a huge person, but I look in the mirror and see flaws and it stings.

I don't understand how grown people can honestly act so casually cruel, are they not taught how to behave in public? Here I was minding my own business, and I'm getting laughed at for doing nothing but taking up space.