You can’t shit on your neighbor’s foot in the middle of the night.

Remains to be seen...

One Piece

Looks like a really bad Spell of weather.

He had a slipped disc.

i don't think we're gonna work out

I was charged with disturbing the peas.

Prime mates.

To air is human

After I had ordered, a little old lady came to me and said, "Aren't you polite. You have such lovely manners."

It was my complimentary nan

I think they're going through a ruff patch.

He duct

We're no longer allowed to play with the chainsaw

It had an unsteady gate

I said, "No. They're mine."

He always uses plane language.

At the flee market.

For Halloween, I want my son to dress
like a locksmith.
But he thinks it would look doorkey.

I work a customer facing position in a mine. Nonetheless, it has to be clean, and id prefer funny. I made the mistake of telling a couple nice ones from this sub, and now its expected! Agh! The pressure is awful! I love that people now want a silly dad joke , (which im serious about), but i am not a dad! I dont have them! Can you guys help me? The best ones are simple and short. Like, what three letter word starts with gas? Car! Why dont monsters eat ghosts? Because they taste like sheet! That ones a little close to HR, but you get the idea. Seasonal ones are awesome. It makes peoples day a little softer on the intro. Please help me!

A poly-con.

... you'll be reposessed.

But I'm sure it's one you've herbivore.

This isn't even my final form!!!