Like I swear I think you hate me cuz you sent one less emoji than your usual 3 emojis
Or you used another one

Like wdym by "Ok"??? youre a fucking 19 year in 2026 and youre genz??

Like should i disappear from ur life? am i hurting you? are you hurting me?
Im constantly on edge that youre just going to ruin my life
i cant ever be dominant

Do you have conversations outloud as if you were talking other people? You are well aware these people don't exist but you make up people and talk to them as if they are in your presence. These people are part of your imagination and serve different roles. You are imagining them and you know they are not real, but you allow them to exist and you have converations with them.

I also have a dissociative disorder, so some of my age regression, loss of skills, lower functioning, etc, is due to that and autism: but I also know when ppl talk about us with BPD, they tend to say we can be immature, emotionally underdeveloped, etc

Has being or feeling like that impacted your life?

For example, I've never lived alone, only started working 'adult' (i.e. w2 job and not under the table for acquaintances) in my 30s, have very little relationship experience, etc. Again not all of this would be due to BPD, but even when I'm fully lucid and present, feeling my appropriate age, I just feel so different and behind from my peers. Anyone else relate?

i am literally running insane. would love to hear other people's experience living with both disorders. also off topic but there should be a subreddit for bpd women, I was looking for it and realized it doesn't exist

I cannot engage in a romantic relationship without it being excruciatingly painful like 80% of the time. From experiencing a perceived betrayal and feeling like I’m carrying so much pain inside my body I’d do almost anything to get it out including smashing my head in or stabbing myself to death to a minor inconvenience that makes me a monster to be around until the other person is sufficiently miserable or I’m tuckered out, I cannot seem to have relationships that don’t make me TW: suicidal or insane. How do y’all navigate this and is it worth continuing to try?

I just wanted to express my gratitude to everyone expressing themselves here- it has in a small way helped me feel less alone with what feels like this abhorrent condition of my existence.

Reading through everyone’s stories and feelings this last month or so has helped me work closer towards trying to understand myself from a place of acceptance and empathy.

will someone please talk to me? no one has ever liked me i’m 19 years old and i can’t even type i can’t explain it in worlds how much it bothers me that no one has ever wanted to be with me i literally can barely walk every day i am so fucking deeply humiliated and defeated i can’t go to therapy i have no friends i have no one to talk to

Those of you with BPD who also have a partner, does the disorder ever cause issues when it comes to the sexual aspect of your relationship?

Say you asked your partner for intimate photos, or you tried to initiate sexual contact (verbal and/or physical), and they refuse/indicate that they are not interested or draw a boundary - did that ever bring out any of the negative symptoms or even lead to a split? What’s your usual, immediate thought process after said “rejection”?

So my child has ADHD. He has a problem with defiance and anger. We are working through the assessment and medication process. I’m noticing people do not want to be around him when he is in one of his moods.

When he is deregulated he needs people the most, but he externalizes his feelings and that hurts everyone around him. Frankly people don’t want to be around him when he is acting badly. People say “I’m going to give you space”, “You need a break to go do something else”, etc. However, I feel like he translates it in his head as being abandoned and rejected.

After years of those types of interactions it’s going to turn into rejection sensitivity, or abandonment issues. My worry is that undiagnosed childhood disorders like autism and ADHD because they’re allowed to proliferate throughout someone’s lifetime and their entire personality absorbs, and takes on the mold of the disorder and how it interacts/clashes with the greater world so we end up becoming BPD adults.

Both of my children are neurodivergent. So there is a high likelihood that I also had ADHD or AuHd as a kid as well. looking back I have quite a lot of similar features as my ADHD child and also I see a lot of my personality in him, though we have different genders and I recognize that ends up having a different ADHD presentation plus I had a much more traumatic home life (Dad = Domestic Abuse + Alcoholic + Neglect).

I know we talk a lot about abuse, but I feel like we don’t talk enough about our innate precursors that led down the timeline of life to our adult BPD designation. I wonder how many of us just went undiagnosed as children?

I was wondering how you, the people of r/BPD knew you had BPD?
Do you need a diagnosis and how did you acquire it?
If you’re willing to share I would appreciate hearing some of the daily struggles, big or small you deal with having BPD.

Does anyone else struggle with a constant pervasive feeling that people are mad at you? I mean everyone.
People driving past me while I'm walking or biking.
My friends. My boss. People who I just met. My mom if I haven't called her in a few days. Then I shut down and can't reach out. I'm afraid they willi be mad.
I constantly feel 1 am doing the wrong thing, paying attention to the wrong thing and someone is like
"where are you what are you doing why aren't you paying attention to _
"
This leaves me never relaxing. I only sit down to sleep lately. I don't know what it means to feel content. Or like I'm not doing something wrong.
Please let me know I'm not alone in this.

I made a couple of cute videos of me, and when i look at them I simply think how sad it is she’s (me) never okay and suffer so much. What a pity it is that her life is as painful as it is for her, but she still manages to look pretty and happy.

And i get this suicid\\\*\\\* ideation kinda feeling when you imagine how my life will be looked at by my peers when i’m already gone, and they’ll feel sorry for me.

I don’t plan on kms btw. but i do feel like i will die young and this will have been a sad example of what life could look like

👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾

I can’t keep a job for the life of me. I have bpd but for jobs. I am in serious debt, and would be living in the streets of not for my family taking in me in. I have no issues getting jobs the issue is 3 weeks to a 1 month later I quit because someone said something to me or something negative happened. It’s a real issue and I can’t even get a bloody psychologist or therapy cause I have no money !!!!!! I don’t know what to do (I’m from France btw)

I was diagnosed 6 years ago and re-diagnosed early this year.

When I was diagnosed 6 years ago I honestly didn’t look too much into it. I already knew what it was and was in denial that I had it. I didn’t take my diagnosis seriously and focused more on my other dx’s in therapy.

Looking back now, I really regret not taking it seriously from the jump. I was drinking a lot (4yrs sober now) and it caused me to constantly split. If I had taken it seriously back then I would be in a much better place now.

After being diagnosed with it again, I decided to take it seriously. I deep dived into it and started talking about it with my friends any family, and I also let potential partners know I have it before getting into a relationship.

Now that I’m finally taking the steps towards remission, weekly DBT therapist & DBT class, I feel like my symptoms have become much worse.

Like, I would split a lot when I was drinking and rarely when I was sober. Now I’m splitting somewhat frequently and just destroying whatever is in front of me. I didn’t use to be like this.

Has anyone else noticed an uptick in symptoms once you started working on it and talking about it?

Like not so much when I’m in crisis but when I’m just chilling. Obvs I’m taking proactive action to fix my life and get to a point I can have healthier relationships but while I’m still where I’m at now holding a plush while relaxing is so so soothing. Would highly recommend. Especially if they’re a little weighted and super soft.

This won’t change much as I have been undergoing treatment (DBT) for a few years now. It is not suspected that I have it at this point it is acted as if I do by my doctor who always seemed a bit hesitant about me being officially diagnosed with it. And according to her it’s not because she thinks I do not likely have it. I’m sure she has her reasons and one of them probably being my mostly inconsistent attendance in therapy due to financial issues.

I get the drugs and little therapy because that’s what works best for my situation right now. It’s what I can afford. So I do go to therapy, get homework, email and have check ins. But it’s not consistent enough for me to make significant progress or as much progress as I could be making.

I was outspoken last session and I told her straight up I want to be screened for BPD and i’m tired of dancing around the diagnosis. Writing this now, I recall another possible reason for her hesitation. She told me that she is not specialized in Borderline Personality Disorder but that she can refer me. I would hate to leave her and I don’t plan on it but I will continue to utilize the various tools at my disposal, and hopefully have more resources and mobility once diagnosed. Anyway, if anyone can speak to me about similar experiences and/or how they reacted or coped after their diagnosis I would much appreciate it! My messaging is open as well.

Ik it’s a common trigger or whatever but fuuuuck it’s messing me up. I really like him (romantically I think) but how will I be able to work around this. He knows I have bpd, and he’s willing to learn or whatever, but he’s probably going to leave eventually too, doing the classic. “I can handle it” until you can’t.

I (20F) was diagnosed very early at 14 and finally having a diagnosis that explained all of my issues was a huge comfort to me. Since then, I’ve also been diagnosed with OCD and Bipolar 2. When I go through my past experiences and take note of different feelings and behaviors, I feel like my parents are so quick to minimize everything and put up a wall between me and everyone else with my diagnosis.

For example, Ive never had a “serious” suicide attempt. I’ve had suicidal ideation, I used to self harm through burning or hitting myself, and I’ve tried to harm myself in front of others while having an episode (which would lead to physical struggles). But all of this is dismissed because at least I was burning and giving myself concussions and not cutting. I always attempted to harm myself in front of others, which means it’s only “attention seeking” and not genuine.

When it comes to trauma I have no “big event” or “serious” thing that happened to me. So every time I mention the verbal abuse I witnessed in my family growing up or small traumas that negatively impacted me, they jump to saying “well you were never assaulted or abused as a child like most people with BPD were”. I’m not trying to ever compete or compare with anyone who has this disorder. Anyone who really understands BPD knows that nobody would wish for this. But I feel like I’m always having to justify my pain to them. Anyone else?

I have BPD and OCD.

My BPD has caused so much turmoil in my marriage to the point that my husband was done with me, or he thought so until deciding to reconcile. We have three kids combined, and for context, his ex-wife triggers me to no end.

Well, I couldn't help myself and looked through his phone. Turns out when he was "done" that he was sexting her and claims he didn't cheat because they never did anything physically.

My heart is broken, I can't trust him, and I have no means to leave the marriage, even if I wanted to. I still want to be with him, but I don't think with my BPD that I can work through this.

Has anyone been able to deal with infidelity with BPD without it destroying them?

I was accepting whilst with my psychiatrist and kind of relieved to be fair (because I’m in my late 30’s and the last 2 years have been a rollercoaster of emotions and trauma that I’ve been working through from childhood).

The pain has hit me a little in the last hour whilst I’ve been wfh today (and I’ve had little moments to reflect). I’m trying to keep myself busy and distracted so I don’t spiral with thoughts and get anxious, but finding it really difficult especially as I’m going to log off soon.

In just the last few hours the enormity of my relationship patterns and (tumultuous) dating life has started to hit home.

If anyone has any helpful advice on DBT Therapy that would be much appreciated but would honestly also appreciate any kind words/words of encouragement for today❤️‍🩹

There are 6 people and one border collie in my home. I am his favorite person. He wants my attention constantly and has creative and clever ways of instigating me.

But when I start spiraling, he doesn’t even come out of his kennel. He just lays there with his head on his paws and looks at me. If I come into a room where he is, he makes sure to sit a distance away and angle towards me. He does not relentlessly require my pets and attention. He basically avoids me.

Then, when I come out of it, here he comes, the most playful, affectionate, and attention-loving dog I’ve ever seen.

Have you had similar experiences?

I've been thinking back to all the support I've had during this journey from friends & therapists and how I felt the moments where I had no one to talk to. I remember feeling as if I could just talk to someone I could feel a little lighter. If you want to chat, I'm here, feel free to message. We can talk about anything that's going on for you.

Me and him lasted nearly six months. We were always very happy even though we did have some arguments, but we are teenagers and that's to be expected. He knows I have BPD, I told him from the start, and he was very supportive. He even researched it for me. Every time I doubted his love he would reassure me and sometimes even get frustrated that I doubted him. We did very intimate things together, we know each other better than anyone else does, and we care about each other so much. Turns out he never loved me, or, that's what he claims. Despite his anger and frustration that I don't believe him, I genuinely think he does. Am I just being delusional? He's my fp and we didn't speak for a whole month, and I was miserable. He always told me he always doubted himself so when he would say he doesn't know if he loves me I would reassure him because I had no reason to not believe him. He was sweet, caring, attentive. He would always go above and beyond for me. He says he has never been attracted to me and he never loved me, but why would he do all that if he didn't love me? Because he "didn't want me to kill myself?" We spoke for a few days after that month of communication (although I reached out to him multiple times begging to talk.)

Last night he told me he was going to move in with his best friend instead of me, despite telling me that he wanted to live with me and have pets and a child, etc. Keep in mind that my ex boyfriend is a transexual male, but he is barely out to anyone. This "friend" of his knows but still calls him by his deadname and addresses him as a girl. It makes me so angry, because I know I could treat him so well if he would just let me. He said, "Maybe I do love you like you insist, but I really love her." That broke my heart even more than it already was. I ended up having a meltdown, I don't remember much. I only had a few screenshots to go off of and I was basically begging for him to give me another chance. I feel so awful. I don't know everything I said and I'm so confused. He blocked me on every platform yet again. My friend spoke to him today, and he said he never wants to speak to me again. He has said this multiple times but we always end up talking again because he does miss me and he does enjoy my company. And because, in my opinion, he loves me. My friend managed to convince him to potentially speak to me come New Year's.

I am still so upset and I am so in love with him, what do you guys think? Do you think he loves me despite what he says and how frustrated he gets? What do I do? I can't get over him, I love him more than anyone could ever love anything, I just want to be there with him and love him.