Hello, I am an NQP for SAS, I’ve officially been out since May but due to some ill health previously I never learned how to drive on blues till August so I’ve only been out as a 2 person crew for a month.
Now with that context out the way, is it normal to feel a huge sense of anxiety in the first few months. I’ve been quite unlucky with crew mates being sick and getting sent all over to buddy up with another single man, today I was on 2 different wagons because my crew mate was pulled 3 hours into our shift and they had to find me a replacement. The constant change, the working with someone different every day, the relief rota, it’s all just making me feel so overwhelmed. I already feel overwhelmed because I’m an NQP making decisions without a mentor standing over me.
I am also so incredibly exhausted on my days off because I feel like I am in such a heightened state while on shift that my days off are nothing except sleep, I feel like I don’t have any hobbies, do anything for fun, or even exercise because I have no motivation or energy. When will this feeling pass?
I also deal with a level of guilt because I know I should feel so lucky I have a job while so many uni graduates can’t get NQP jobs.
How long does it take to get used to the job and adjust to relief shift patterns. Does anyone have any advice, I want to have a life outside work but it just feels like too much right now.