r/Life • • 15h ago

Let's discuss Growing up, my parents never let me try to be pretty

1 Upvotes

So, I (21F) have recently resented my mum for not letting me have long hair when I was a kid, not encouraging me to take care of my appearance, and my dad for saying only stupid girls care about looks. So, even tho I was blessed with good natural looks, I never got the chance to use it throughout childhood.

It wasn't until when I was 17 that I realized that their ways are fundamentally flawed, and it isn't shallow to care about looks. I then started learning how to present myself better, and just the act of that made people treat me better and made me happier.

I still hate them for discouraging me to care about my appearance from a young age. They wasted 17 years of my life.

They are not particularly pretty, and my dad was overweight, so idk if they used the "being pretty is shallow" excuse to soothe themselves, and then taught me that as well...


r/Life • • 6h ago

Need Advice I am in debt and my house is next to a church, what are my options if I am unhappy?

2 Upvotes

So... let me get to the point.

I fixed up the house I inherited a few years ago cause I no one would buy it (old house, close by a church).

I was paying a lot of money for keeping it alive and it was too late to decline the inheritance at that point.

So I dicided if I fix it up properly (new windows, good ones, insulation etc.) I might hear the church bells inside a little bit but not too much.

Problem: I spent 500.000 € to fix that up, live in it and I can't really sleep anymore since 2 years.
I also can't sell it.

So I am too poor to move away.

Was probably a bad choice but I was hoping the construction dudes were right and they can make it sound proof. I don't hear it "loud loud" but loud enough that it wakes me up at 11 am a little bit and at 12:05 pm the next 3 minutes bells go again.

The bell plan is basically 24/7 and the bells start at 05:30 AM (morning), 11 AM, 12:05 pm, 6:00 pm for each 3 minutes. The other bells go every 1/4, 2/4, 3/4 and 4/4 + big gong for the whole hour.

So if it is lets say 10 in the morning, it gongs 4 times small and 10 times big cause it's 10.

Sometimes really I think I should end it, because I have no sleep and no escape. I am locked here in this huge house that is great but the bells are ruining me.

I tried contacting the church for help but 2 neighbors out 6 close neighbors want the bells to stay on. The other 4 don't really care but 1 of them is also annoyed.
In my country the bells aren't considered "noise" and can't be put to court.

So I have no legal right to win in a law suit and I have 2 neighbors who want these bells.

I know that ending it isn't an option, but does anyone else see an option for me? I can't afford buying a new place to rent cause of the mortgage. Maybe I am blind and just lost and not thinking clearly anymore. I am very sad and sleep deprived.

My brother jokingly says gas is expensiv, but not that expensive. I say na man I'm not made for that lol.


r/Life • • 2h ago

Let's discuss WHY should you live a fulfilling life?

2 Upvotes

It's always how to live a fulfilling life or what makes a fufilling life but why? Why do you live a fulfilling life or why do you want to live a fulfilling life?

It's easy to find answers on how to live but I don't often see or hear people discuss why and want to know why others think so.


r/Life • • 3h ago

Let's discuss What are your thoughts on death?

6 Upvotes

Does it feel strange to know you're going to die at some point? Does it make you feel sad or make you feel motivated to keep going and live life to the fullest?

I've been thinking about this because of my poetry course (most themes have been about death or someone acknowledging the fact they are going to face death at some point). Some themes view death as a monster, though other themes view death as an indifferent force that has no ill will. In some poems, death is a friend that lends you a helping hand.

I've been interested in our own understanding that we are going to die at some point–this is inevitable and unavailable. But how we view the end is so different that I can't help admire it in a weird way.

What do you all think?


r/Life • • 12h ago

Let's discuss I miss the life i had

9 Upvotes

Idk how I got here, but I really miss the life. years ago.

I was always a loner, but back then, I'd watch films, listen to music and get into new genres, read books, explore Substack, watch YouTube, sketch, write, scroll through Pinterest, and just learn random shit that probably had no meaning or purpose whatsoever. I was so connected to art back then and i sorta liked it

I really fucking miss those days.

Ofc, it wasnt all good. I had days when I'd worry about my future, question what I was doing with my life, and feel like I wasn't going anywhere. Things were different back then, and I had my own problems, but at least I was doing something. I was curious about things. There was always something I wanted to watch, read, learn, or make.

Now, idk how I ended up here. I barely consume anything, let alone create anything. I feel like I'm just living in nostalgia, missing a version of my life that I can't seem to get back to. All I do now is go to the gym, eat, and repeat. And don't get me wrong, the gym is alright, but I didn't join it to fix my mental health or anything. Idk why I even joined in the first place lol And honestly, I don't think the gym, or any other habit for that matter, can magically fix your mental health when your surroundings aren't great. Having to deal with people you don't wanna be around, feeling like things aren't great at home, and knowing your family isn't particularly happy with you either. Idk, it gets to you. The gym might make you feel a little better, but it can't fix everything.

I'm not looking for sympathy or anything. I jus dont really have anyone I can call a friend, someone I can talk to about random shit, share things with, or genuinely connect with. I barely socialise anymore, and maybe that's part of why everything feels so dull. When you have people around you, even if it's just casual conversations, their opinions and the desire to be understood by someone can make you more curious about the them and even about yourself. You have things to share, things to discover, and reasons to look beyond your own head. At least that's how I see it.

Maybe this is just what turning 19 feels like. The end of being a teenager, I guess. You're supposed to figure out what you wanna do with your life, but I'm sitting here feeling like I've barely done anything with mine. There's still so much I wanna do. I wanna make music, write, film amd stuff, learn new things, explore art, and a hundred other things I can't even list rn.

And it's not like I've stopped wanting those things. That's the weird part. I still want to do all of them, but somehow, I just don't. I cant remember anything about this 1-2 year that i have done something for me and lol idk even remember

What i did at all.

Idk, maybe I'm just rambling at this point. I don't even know what I'm expecting by posting this. Maybe I just wanted to put these feelings into words somewhere, or hear from people who've felt the same way.


r/Life • • 13h ago

Need Advice Is this all there is to life?

5 Upvotes

I feel like I have nothing going on in my life. All I do is work and then go straight home. I try to go to meetup groups and its either all old people or people who just came with their friends and only want to talk to their friends. I don't have any big hobbies except for browsing the internet I guess. I want to go out to parties and music events but those are no fun when you're all alone. I wanted to go back to school to maybe meet some new people but I feel like I'd stick out like a sore thumb being 10 years older than everyone else. Also nothing is really worth studying anyways, it would just be a waste of money. I wish I could date but no one wants to match with someone on a dating site whose pictures are all frumpy selfies. Is this really all there is to life?


r/Life • • 19h ago

Need Advice Eight years, $500K in Debt. The war i never asked for.

9 Upvotes

I used to have a business, a business partner, and what felt like a shiny life. Then the crisis came and flipped everything upside down.
For eight years now, I’ve been in court. I’ve sold almost everything I could sell to keep fighting my former partner. He keeps attacking me, and now he wants to take my house. I owe friends and relatives around $500,000. Yesterday my car was blocked, so I can’t even use or dispose of it anymore. On top of that, bankruptcy proceedings are underway—and the debts won’t be discharged.
I often sit on the edge of my bed before sleep and think about what to do next. Just me, the silence, and the next move.
Please don’t blame me for something I did wrong. I’m fighting alone against a much stronger enemy. I don’t even know what advice I’d want to hear. I just know I’ll solve this too. I don’t know how, but I know I’ll come out of this victorious.
Maybe someone out there has been through something similar. I’m not asking for sympathy. I’m just telling the story.


r/Life • • 11h ago

Legal & Domestic Issues I'm currently in jury selection process for a lawsuit and I'm hoping to be selected just to break up the meaningless, boring, pathetic monotony of my worthless daily life

13 Upvotes

First day was yesterday. Today was the first day of actually questioning jurors and seeing who to dismiss. I didn't get a single question from the lawyers, while they grilled other people about their answers to questions and dismissed a number of people. I think it seems somewhat likely that I will get selected being an opinion-less blob, and it's a trial that they project to last until the week before Thanksgiving.

This isn't even a cool criminal trial. It's a civil trial contract dispute between a company and a former executive. I could have been honest speaking about this. I could have said that the last thing I care about is if some rich fucking asshole gets even richer from some contract payout. I could have said that the industry the company is in makes it the scum of the Earth and that everyone at the company should burn in hell. I'm not biased against either side in the trial, I think both sides are assholes. But I held my tongue... because at least by doing jury duty, even not getting paid... it will bring something different and perhaps a little bit interesting to the monotony of my pathetic life. Maybe I can sit there for a few weeks, not have to go to my terrible job (except on Fridays), and actually discover something interesting about society and feel like I'm making a bit of difference unlike the rest of my life.


r/Life • • 20h ago

Health & Fitness I was in a coma for 29 days

234 Upvotes

On September 5th while hanging out with some friends and my wife, I had a seizure that caused me to aspirate and left me not able to breathe. The paramedics were able to get me to emergency in 5 minutes and 50 seconds. I spent 29 days in a coma and technically died 4 times. I was intubated, had a PICC line, had a pacing wire and later had a tracheostomy. The doctors diagnosed with me pretty severe pneumonia in both my lungs. They had to pump 14 lbs of liquid from my body. There was times where my oxygen levels were in the 40's

The amount of fighting and advocating my wife did for me while I was out is nothing short of life saving. If it wasnt for her I'd be dead. That's a fact. I stayed in the ICU for another 3 weeks. I lost 60 pounds while there. My healing has been a miracle. I've since been released from the ICU straight to home and I'm recovering.

This doesnt feel real to me. This feels like an episode of a medical drama. And I also feel like I time traveled. So ya, thats my story.


r/Life • • 18h ago

Let's discuss Not everyone deserves forgiveness just because they apologized

65 Upvotes

I think society puts too much pressure on people to forgive. Saying “sorry” doesn’t undo years of disrespect, betrayal, or damage. Sometimes the healthiest response isn’t forgiveness or revenge; it’s simply cutting someone off permanently and moving on. Do you think everyone deserves a second chance?


r/Life • • 1h ago

Need Advice Confusion about life

• Upvotes

I’ll try to put this into words as good as I can. I have this feeling that my life is in pieces instead of an ensemble? It doesn’t feel coherent if that makes sense, it’s like there’s a piece here a piece there and some of these pieces aren’t even logical for me or doesn’t fit what/where I want. It’s like my life isn’t flowing, ofcourse I know there’ll be bumps along the way and it won’t always be smooth going but there has to be atleast some sort of coherence?
Has anyone had this and did you solve it by getting a purpose or practicing something else?


r/Life • • 5h ago

Need Advice Have you ever had to leave the love of your life due to money?

17 Upvotes

I'm with a girl I really love and I know she loves me too. She's in med school and is going to be a doctor in a few years. I am so proud of her, genuinely.

My situation is different. I don't have a degree because I had to step up and help my family when they needed me. I now I'm working an office job that pays and helps me keep going

I don't know what my earnings will look like in 10 years. She is going to earn significantly more than me and I worry about that.

I want to give her the life she deserves, but I'm terrified that I'll only ever be able to provide the basics and not much more, unless I somehow make it big. I love her so much that I don't want her to be stuck with someone who holds her back.

Has anyone been in a similar situation where one partner (especially the woman) earns way more? Did it work out? Did the guy manage to feel secure?

Should I break up now to not waste her time, or keep going and hope I figure it out? I don't want to make a decision based on insecurity but I don't want to be selfish either.

Any honest advice appreciated.


r/Life • • 12h ago

Let's discuss What are the things you wish you did in your life ?

6 Upvotes

I’m gonna start :

-I wish I’ve done scouting, I am now too old to do some but I am always envious when I see some in the street. It’s something I would’ve love so much. Obviously there were none scout groups where I lived when I was young.

-I wish I just sticked to a sport when I was younger and didn’t do 1year =1 new sport to try. I would’ve love to master something like figure skating, classical dance or baseball.

-I wish I just forced myself to see my grandpa at the hospital and didn’t just stay in the hall because the Covid restrictions were a bummer and seriously I was lazy. He died two days after.

I am in my twenties so for now there is not too much things that I feel my heart hurting when I think about it.


r/Life • • 14h ago

Positive Have you ever returned to a dream you thought you'd outgrown?

3 Upvotes

Sometimes a dream doesn't end. It simply moves into the background while other parts of life need our attention.

Family, work, caregiving, financial responsibilities, and personal commitments can all shape when we have room to pursue something new.

I've been exploring this idea through a short cinematic scene featuring Candice Noelle Sarka, a fictional married mother of five who pauses during an ordinary morning at home. She looks at her notebook, remembers something she still wants for herself, and begins writing again.

Nothing is solved in that moment. The significance is that she allows the possibility to return.

It raises a question I find interesting:

Have you ever returned to a dream, idea, or ambition after a long period of putting it aside? What helped you reconsider it?

I'm interested in the experience itself, not just stories with neat endings. Sometimes the dream changes, sometimes the timing changes, and sometimes we discover that what we wanted still matters in a different way.


r/Life • • 14h ago

Need Advice How do I gain ability to live a life?

9 Upvotes

My entire life was and is purposeless, I don't have any hobbies, nothing seems fun, I don't know how to talk to anyone, especially when I don't have any clue about anything because I'm dumb. I don't care about what will happen to me. There was and probably still is this stupid thing about me when I want to do something I want to do, I won't do it, because I'm ashamed of it (I'm talking about simple things like listening to music or cooking). My life is boring, like I said, nothing is fun for me. I don't go out because I probably have enormous social anxiety, I'm stressed almost all the time when I go out. I don't see my future. I'm thinking that I should not be born, I'm just a parasite. I could probably tell more, but who cares. I'm just an NPC which is just existing.


r/Life • • 15h ago

Need Advice Near Car Accident - I feel so guilty

2 Upvotes

Hey guys, on my way to the bus stop to which I normally drive to I had a near accident when I got on the roundabout to make the first exit. The driver on the roundabout (it was a small roundabout so you can't really accelerate on it) and their indicator on to signal but I though that they were going to make the exit that was before and so I misjudged and went on the roundabout and had the driver of the vehicle not slowed themselves down we would have crashed. (if you are the driver I am so sorry for the whole situation). Turns out the driver was exiting the roundabout onto the same exit that I was (which is a local park that most locals just park their car to take the bus) I freaked out and parked my car away from the car behind me and took a solid 5 to 10 minutes in my car freaking out and trying to calm myself down. I didn't see the owner of the car get out the vehicle and once I had some what composed myself I went to the bus stop and I noticed a car getting out of the car park and just kept walking. I honestly beat myself up because I should have approached the car and apologised to the driver but I was a complete mess and I couldn't think straight at all. Once I got on the bus as the bus drove past the car park I noticed that the car I had a near miss with wasn't in the car park anymore and started freaking out. Its been like almost three hours since this incident I still feel so guilty and I can't even concentrate. This is the first time that I have ever had just a near miss accident in my life and I'm about to get my opens soon too (i've been driving on my P's for 2.5 years now) and I keep beating myself up about this I don't know how to proceed. I feel so guilty for scaring the driver because of my misjudgement. I take full responsibility for my actions I just feel so guilty for potentially scaring the other driver and putting us both in such a frightening situation. I feel like I shouldn't never drive at all anymore too and I don't know how to continue on about this.


r/Life • • 18h ago

Need Advice I feel empty

8 Upvotes

I feel empty deep inside; I don't know what this is. It's coming from all sides; I don't know what that means or how to say it. I can't sleep; I have trouble sleeping. I have been trying to sleep for the last 5 hours. I always want to eat even if I am full or chew smth because I feel stressed. I feel empty. I don't feel anything. Just anger, rage, lust, and anxiety.


r/Life • • 18h ago

Let's discuss what’s the worst advice you’ve ever taken?

6 Upvotes

i always say to people don’t take advice from people you don’t wanna be anything like and i’ve been proudly following this since i was like 11! but i get curious what advice people have taken that ended up being terrible!


r/Life • • 19h ago

Need Advice I’m lost

1 Upvotes

I feel lost at 22, living with my boyfriend and our 18-month-old son. I have cared for my great-grandmother for five years and recently added a weekend job, so I work seven days straight while attending nursing school. Although I am paid for caregiving, it now drains me more than it supports me, and my new role pays better. At 22, I want to experience more of life; my boyfriend wishes to move back home four hours away, which worries me slightly, but I am more afraid because I do not know how to end my caregiving. I carry heavy guilt, fearing that if I leave and she passes away, it will be my fault. I always said we can move when she passes but what if I’m 28 by then I basically wasted life waiting at that point. I am unsure what to do anymore.


r/Life • • 19h ago

Positive Surreal Video chat experience

1 Upvotes

My college recently ended. I made several friends there. One of them is a guy who always talks big- "My watch is INR 60,000", "These boots are INR 23000, so cheap" etc- Sometimes I feel how much one actually says these types of things so casually. He always disregards jobs worth 20 lakhs or 40 lakhs as a nuisance. He is not a bad guy, he may show off but when it comes to respecting other people's budget wise spending he tries to mix in.

Today, after 2 years (we were connected all this while), I called him at 11pm. He was busy. Called me back in an hour- talked for 10 minutes and then normal call converted into a video call. He showed me his home cum residential property right beside a senior level govt. officer villa.

The place spanned over 100 x 120 feet(my assumptions). The so called 'house' had a lift, two separate power storage stations for the shop and the house with over 9 batteries, a jacoozi, just his room so wide that from his bed to desk he is gonna take at least 7 steps, a fountain, corridor so wide that one can widen their arms apart from the body fully and constantly moving across other rooms in his house could make one complete his 5000 steps per day target.

No wonder for him business only mindset is adequate. His family has two business and one manufacturing supporting one business.

Bro literally had like INR 20 lakh - 30 lakhs of stock sold but yet to be delivered.

The college we studied in together is one of the best in the country yet he always hated. I see now.

It is easily understandable that in India, unless you own something, financial freedom will be limited and comes at the cost of time.

I am not comparing nor I am questioning others rather it's a constructive view point. His family built this wealth generation by generation thus, comparison is a lost battle for me. His house was well above my dream and there are certainly many more out there which exceed this.

I don't think that his fate makes me envious rather, it makes me believe in myself more in taking the right steps towards acquiring my dream house without breaking myself for good.


r/Life • • 23h ago

Need Advice Please help me help my sister.

2 Upvotes

I (18,m) have a sister,14. She shifted into a new school around 2.5 years ago. Ever since she got into her class, she has been complaining about not having good friends, toxic behavior of peers, and feelings of loneliness and being left out.

On several occasions she mentions that girls of her classroom often leave her alone in group activities, refrain from helping her with missed schoolwork, and talk those out of friendships who are friends with her, and friends ghosting her and leaving her queries unaddressed.

She feels very alone, even depressed I'd say. She is also very conscious of her looks, often thinking that she looks ugly ( she has squint in one of her eyes and obviously she has acne on her face as she's a teenager). She has low self confidence...

And unfortunately the home in which my family lives is also toxic because of our joint family (the relatives ruin it of course), due to which we are unable to provide her a peaceful environment even at home. (Although we are working for it and soon will change where we live).

As a brother I don't really know what to do to comfort her. I myself felt the same way during my school years but then I had a friend group to rely on.

I am worried that she might end up hurting herself or anyone around her. I don't want it to result in something bad and I want to help her through this phase.

And we are also planning to change her schools within two years as it's not allowed right now under current educational rules.


r/Life • • 23h ago

Need Advice What do i doo?

2 Upvotes

Im a 19 year old man and I have been alone most of my life. Thats means i had some temporary friends, had a loving family, had relationships but i never had what i wanted. I want to have a friendgroup or lots of friends who are interested in me, so we can travel together, text and go everywhere.

About me:

I live in budapest, i have multiple interest, being mainly music and guitar. I look relatively pretty, im always complimenting other people on the street, rarely saying no for a sidequest/opportunity. Im a first year uni student, and i went to every uni event, always talked first to people, always texted them first, then they just didnt stay. I go out alone too, to explore but i really cant find anyone permanent. There are no bands i could join based on my interest in music, and i joined 4 clubs at uni. There is no one like me. What do i do? I was really hoping in high school that i would find real friends here but i cant. I also look unique so im interesting to people. My psychologist said i have no mental disorders and im an okay person. Sorry if this text doesnt make much sense btw im just venting. Wtf do i do, i see all my "friends" on instagram hanging out with others and going everywhere and i just dont have this.