I'm a dentist who graduated in 2022, and ever since then, I've been struggling to figure out what I really want to do with my career.
Initially, I wanted to prepare for government exams and secure a good government job. I genuinely wanted to clear the exams, but whenever I sat down to study, I couldn't concentrate properly. My mind would constantly tell me, "Time is passing. What if I can't clear the exam? What if I fail? What if I'm wasting my time while everyone else is moving ahead?"
Instead of focusing on the material in front of me, I would spend hours worrying about whether I was doing enough and whether I would eventually succeed.
Eventually, I started working in private jobs, but I haven't felt satisfied with my career choices. I also enrolled in an online MBA in Healthcare Management, which I expect to complete in about six months. However, I'm still unsure about what direction I should take after that.
The biggest problem is that, over the last four to five years, I haven't studied consistently for even a single day. I know competitive exams require patience, discipline, concentration, and months or years of preparation. But whenever I try to restart, the same cycle begins.
I start studying, worry about the time I've already lost, compare myself with people who are ahead of me, question whether I can actually clear the exam, and eventually lose focus. I keep thinking about my future instead of doing the work that might improve it.
I'm now at a point where I don't know whether I genuinely want a government job or whether I'm holding on to the idea because I feel that I should achieve something prestigious. I still have a chance to attempt certain government exams over the next year or two, but I don't know whether I should give myself another chance or focus entirely on building a career in the private sector.
I'm also scared that if I choose the government exam route, I'll spend more years preparing and end up with nothing. On the other hand, if I give up now, I might always regret not trying properly.
I'd really appreciate advice on a few things:
Why does my mind keep wandering toward the future, deadlines, failure, and comparisons whenever I sit down to study? How can I break this cycle?
Has anyone experienced years of inconsistent studying and successfully rebuilt their concentration and discipline? What actually helped you?
Given my background in dentistry and an MBA in Healthcare Management, would it be wiser to pursue government exams or focus on private-sector healthcare and corporate jobs?
How do I distinguish between a genuine ambition to get a government job and the fear of giving up on something I've wanted for years?
If you were in my position, how would you make this decision without wasting another year?
I know that ultimately, no one can make this decision for me. I'm not expecting a shortcut or a guarantee of success. I just want to understand why I'm stuck in this pattern and how to move forward with a realistic plan.
Sometimes I feel like I've fallen too far behind, and that thought itself stops me from taking action. I'd appreciate honest advice, especially from people who have faced similar struggles or changed career paths after graduation.