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u/Bigglez1995 4d ago
I'm used to this because I live in a
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u/upvotemaster42069 4d ago
Same. Also
and shows only a few a day after this point bumble throttles profiles 10
u/Mountain-Elk8133 4d ago
Somewhat rural here. Like 100k people in my general area and another 100k a couple hours away
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u/KorrokHidan 4d ago
Bro how is 100k people rural, that’s a small city not a rural area
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u/Mountain-Elk8133 4d ago
Its not extremely rural, but I have had people tell me that my area is not nearly large enough to have a chance.
My town has probably 40k people and other towns have 5 to 10k within an hour.
Im in montana and in one of the larger cities
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u/AfterInspection7986 4d ago
I guess it matters how large of an area you’re talking. 100,000 in New York is like 3 feet. 100,000 in Montana feels a bit further apart.
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u/Equinanymous 4d ago
I'd have to drive 5 hours to get to 100k people...nearest town is a few hundred.
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u/Perfect_Region1526 2d ago
My entire county has less than 18,000 people and no hospital. The next county over has a hopsital but less than 10,000 people.
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u/BatScribeofDoom 4d ago
It may not be rural, but 100k is still small enough to fuck over your chances if you're not in the majority demographics for said small city.
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u/naked_avenger 4d ago
In terms of single women in his age range, that's not going to be very many though. 100k ppl. Half are men. 50k women. About 12% are 21-30. Down to 6k potential singles. Now you have to weed out those who aren't single and those who dont use apps. We can call it half maybe. That's a week or two worth of swipes if you're being reasonably picky about your right swipes.
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u/Bigglez1995 4d ago
Theres around 6000 people where I live, but if I were to add up all the towns in my county, it would be around 100k. Of course the amount of people who are A. On the apps, and B. are within your age bracket will narrow it down significantly
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u/Advanced_Double_42 4d ago
Yeah this is just what happens within a week of using an app.
Best part is it will do the same thing in the city even if there are hundreds or thousands of profiles left, just to get you to take a break.
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u/krabs91 4d ago
Why are Americans so weird about age?
There is a war in the comments bc a 28 year old would date a 21 year old women…
What’s up with that?
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u/Mountain-Elk8133 4d ago
Idk. A good portion of my friends and couples I know have a 4 to 7 year age gap
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u/Jitlok 4d ago
Don't take advice from women on reddit, at this point i think its a PSYOP. You included college age women at 28. You aren't grooming 18 year olds. These birds act like women at 21 are children you are taking advantage of.
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u/karamatsushinji 4d ago
They are jealous that younger women are taking men from them lol. Ignore them and enjoy young women !
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u/Sad-Golf5166 4d ago
But I thought that women have millions of men after them and the poor men have to survive on crumbs and loneliness. Now it turns out there's a shortage of men, and the few young, beautiful women are taking them from old, jealous women!. I guess I'll never trust men on Reddit and their lies again!
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u/Cold-Maize-5576 4d ago
But they also want these women to be able to cancel out the vote of such an old man. Since when can children vote?
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u/Busy-Drawer626 4d ago
It's a classic liberal thing. Women can't actually make their own choices and neither can minorities. They must be protected at all cost. Especially from themselves. The shall not date who they want. Nor can they buy menthol cigarettes!
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u/Emergency_Matter_724 4d ago
Wait you’re 28 and you don’t want to date a 31 year old woman? Am I reading this correctly? I don’t think it’s too weird to date a 21 year old but it’s odd to me your cut off is 30 at 28.
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u/ChocoTomanal 2d ago
Why its called having a preference, plus the fact girls dont want to date guys younger than them, plus women peak at 30.
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u/Human-Kangaroo-2716 4d ago
Speaking about people being weird about age...
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u/Emergency_Matter_724 4d ago
Right? It’s weird to not want to date someone three-five years older or younger to me for most ages. But to each their own. I usually dated younger men and am about to get married to a younger man. But it was never on purpose that’s just who asked me out mostly. Plus or minus 5 years never bothered me.
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u/DeadLockAdmin 4d ago
I don't date older women.
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u/Emergency_Matter_724 4d ago
“A woman hasn’t shown me real affection in a decade.” I mean maybe because you wouldn’t date a woman a couple years older than you. I’d be weirded out by that. Most of my partners have been a little bit younger than me and I’m about to marry a younger man. It’s pretty normal.
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u/archwin 3d ago
Apart from all that, dude, I think bumble has gone down quite a bit. I’ve been on and off of it in fact, most recently maybe about a year ago, and I had dramatically more matches last time.
I started about a month ago and it was like crickets by comparison. By that point I had a lot more matches the last time I was on.
And the whole experience overall felt worse because there was so many more bots
I don’t know what’s going on that I got so discouraged I deleted the whole damn thing.
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u/Equinanymous 4d ago
My late parents were over 12 years apart, lifelong (50+ years) marriage, the happiest couple I've ever known. Yes she was the younger or I wouldn't be here. And if there was any power imbalance, she had the upper hand. Age gaps really really don't matter. .
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u/Fit_To_Be_Pied 4d ago
I think it is less about the gap but more the gap imbalance. Once upon a time, I was a 29F dating a 22M (which turned into a 3 year relationship). But, part of that is because I went to college late. Furthermore, unlike OP, I would also have been willing to date people who are 7 years older than me as well. But, everyone has their preferences, I guess. I am now a divorced 44F who is back to dating younger (had married an older man), but I would be open to dating the right older man.
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u/Flyingcroww 3d ago
It really depends on intentions imo. Im 26, and have my dating profile set to see 20-37. Any older than that, and if we do decide to have kids (im undecided but not in a financial or mental situation to raise one rn) it may be too late by the time im ready. And any younger than that and the gap in maturity and life experience is likely too large. Not saying I wouldnt date an 18-19yo, but it'd have to be a case by case basis with someone who i know well and know that they have the maturity level to be properly and enthusiastically engaged in said relationship.
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u/Hopeful-Pea7187 4d ago
It is baffling, in my personal dating experience. . My 53yo m friend dated a 62yo woman, after that he entered a relationship with a 30yo. We are like, awesome, nbd
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u/NemoSkittles 3d ago
People can't drink til 21 and increasingly older people are still living at home,( in a culture where its the norm to be out at 18), due to the cost of living.
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u/tranquilovely 4d ago
I don't think it's the issue of dating a 21 year old, but it's the issue of not dating more than 2 years older.
And personally, I don't think a 21yo and a 28yo have a lot in common when it comes to life. At 28 now, I was so stupid and naive at 21, I just couldn't date someone that young. I look for a bit more emotionally maturity.
But it's not the age, it's the range. If you will go 7 years younger, why not 7 years older??
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u/InfamousAd8543 4d ago
"Research shows that women generally prefer romantic partners close to their own age or slightly older (typically up to 3 to 7 years older), though preferences shift as women age"
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u/Mountain-Elk8133 4d ago
Idk, 30 just seemed like a good round number. And it was a loose 30. I was seeing up to 35 pretty often
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u/Sufficient_Total7445 4d ago
Whole thread got derailed because a bunch of insecure femcels got mad that a 28 year old man has the audacity to checks notes… filter for women in their 20’s
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u/OutrageousCow70 4d ago
Theres one that says “its not about having 7 years younger, but he only has 2 years older” like he has a moral duty to date older and its not his own personal choice who he wants to date Lmoo
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u/Tight_Replacement554 4d ago
Yet you’d cry if a woman only wants to date rich/tall men lol
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u/AnyReasonToCare 4d ago
Thats literally fine, though? If thats your preference than thats your preference. You're the one crying here.
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u/Unique-Afternoon6316 4d ago
Everyone who lives to 30 got to be 21 years old at some point. I don’t understand how this is analogous even a little.
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u/Tight_Replacement554 4d ago
Because you're arguing about preferences. Everyone gets to have preferences
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u/lakimens 4d ago
That's quite literally most women on the apps. You're saying it like it's bigfoot level rarity.
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u/obfuscatedanon 4d ago
Write the number of times you have enthusiastically campaigned against women not dating short men: _
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u/AdagioHead9263 4d ago
brother I'll be deadass honest, long story short I was thinking about dating a friend girl aged 19 when I was 28, I've never tried to ask someone so young and it felt wrong, so I asked my lil sis (who had a boyfriend around her age at the time) if that okay, she literally answered me "ew, you really thinking about getting with a girl younger than me?? that's weird!!" she was 21 years old at the time.
fast forwards two years later she broke with her boyfriend and got with a 35 years old around a month after if not less, she was 23.
I literally didn't even start with that girl because of what she told me, but here the thing, it was my mistake listening to her, not her mistake feeling that way.
in the end, I still didn't start with her afterhand (even tho I still am in contact) because I really don't feel it's right and she is religious while i'm not and know it will be a problem.
but if something I learnt from it, is that you should listen to yourself, if it's legal it's okay.btw right now dating a girl 37 years old (I'm 30M) so I'm certainly not like what most of these outraged girl in the coms think.
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u/TopEffective8989 4d ago
How old r u tho
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u/TeloS53100 3d ago
God forbid than a guy in his check notes 20s would look for girls in their check screenshot 20s.... Pitiful
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u/Mountain-Elk8133 4d ago
28
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u/Livid_Medium3731 4d ago
You would date someone 7 years younger but only 2 years older? Most girls who are 21 years old won't date someone significantly older. Why aren't you looking for someone a bit more age appropriate? Or maybe don't do that if you need that age gap
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u/TaxPrimary4193 4d ago
You're just being judgemental for the sake of being judgmental. He IS looking for age appropriate. His range is 21-30. The most age appropriate is 24-30 imo, and he included some more because why not. I don't think you need to shame men in their 20's to date women in their 30's
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u/Livid_Medium3731 4d ago
This is not about 20s or 30s. He is closer to his 30's than to his 20's. Like be fr.
As I have written in my comment, if he is like that he should stay like that.
It results in less matches for him and I think the girlies who see his preferences will get the ick.
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u/PugRexia 4d ago
What? You just admitted he isn’t looking for age appropriate, he’d be looking at 24-30 if he was. Included more cause why not? But only on the younger side? Come on.
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u/Fun_Situation2310 4d ago
"Most girls who are 21 years old won't date someone significantly older."
this just isnt true, strangely the second i turned 26 i got a substantial increase in like-rate from 18-19 year old girls, which was concerning
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u/PressureImaginary569 4d ago edited 4d ago
Most girls who are 21 years old won't date someone significantly older.
What are we basing this on exactly? As a 27 year old man women who are 28-31 seem a lot more likely to have negative feelings about my age than women in their early 20s.
From talking to both groups it seems like the overwhelming majority of people prefer older men to younger men.
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u/Livid_Medium3731 4d ago
Most prefer someone slightly older, like 1-3 years and not significantly older though. As I look into my friend group most have boyfriends their age. The biggest age gap is 5 years and it's only one couple.
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u/society000 4d ago
Why do people act like 21 year olds are literally children? If they can't date someone seven years older than them, they shouldn't be allowed to vote, if you think they're that stupid and groomable.
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u/StormieShake 4d ago
And only 2 years older? You haven't won the game until youve swiped on women at least 15
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u/coomersage 4d ago
lmfao, mfs downvoted cause a 28yo is tryna date 21+ ADULT women🤦♂️
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u/Greedy_Rabbit_1741 4d ago
It's reddit. Downvotes are a badge of honor when it comes to anything related to women or social stuff in general.
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u/Turtleopard 4d ago
But refused to date 31+ ADULT women...
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u/coomersage 4d ago
I'm not sure if you realize it, but 31+ is an entirely different strat. In the 20s you are looking at students, people who are starting out in their careers or just finding themselves. Shit gets real after 30s. You will be looking at someone who's looking for a serious relationships/get married, carrier oriented etc. Dating someone in 20s vs 30s is an entirely different thing when you are in your 20s.
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u/society000 4d ago
The reaction to this is fucking insane lmao. We need to raise the voting age to 30 if 21 year olds are as naive and groomable as people here are claiming. In 10 years, people will be calling a 31 year old a pedo for dating a 29 year old.
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u/MKErose 4d ago
Raise your age preferences. Right now you have it set to include a demographic that is mostly interested in people their age (ie not you). Source - I am of that demographic and have had to explain to many late 20s/early 30s dudes that the difference in life stage/maturity makes it hard for me to see them in a romantic light.
If you want to maximize the amount of matches you get, you have to consider who is more likely to take interest in you, which would probably be women in their mid to late 20s through mid 30s, and have them included in your preferences settings so the algorithm can make a point to show you to more people.
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u/Admirable-Air9895 4d ago
I live how how everyone is trying to shove it in your face about your age preferences, or any preference for that matter. Hypocrisy at its best.
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u/External-Ad2885 4d ago
peak male experience
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u/Away_Elephant_4688 4d ago
average moid being 28 and setting their age filter to 21. im 22 and 18-19 are a no no for me
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u/External-Ad2885 4d ago
what a dumb argument, let me guess? you are from the US?
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u/Flashmode2 4d ago
It clearly says a range from 21 through 30 so that’s an actual adult in their age range
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u/Liktarios 4d ago
Switch filter to men to get matches /s
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u/CoffeeeAndBiscotti 4d ago
Laughing at the Disney adults who think 21 is too young for a 28 year old in this thread.
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u/AccountantPublic758 3d ago
This is my logic on this, take it or leave it. I was a very different person at 28 than I was at 21, both emotionally and financially. At 28, I wouldn’t have wanted to date a 21-year-old. And at 21, I would’ve questioned the maturity of a 28-year-old who wanted to date me. A 30-year-old and a 40-year-old can feel closer in age because they’re more likely to be at similar stages in life.
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u/Medium_Anteater_5280 4d ago
I agree, they’re old enough to consent and if it works it works
However, I will say, it’s sus for a 28 yr old to actively seek out 21 yr olds. Not saying this guy is doing that necessarily as he could choose from whoever the platform filters, but the maturity and lifestyle gap here is large.
Idk a sane 28 yr old man who wants to put up with 21 yr old women for reasons other than they’re young and easy to manipulate. Is it age appropriate? Sure. Is it socially questionable? Also sure.
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u/Ok3oomer 3d ago
Socially questionable for slow ass Americans, when will you understand that you're getting mocked worldwide for crying about age gap?
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u/According-Context193 4d ago
You beat bumble good job brob
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u/Middle-Gas-6532 4d ago
I beat Tinder in an area with about 2.5 million people in 3 weeks. Of course new profiles pop up every day, but only a few dozen.
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u/Altranite- 4d ago edited 4d ago
Swiped through every profile in his city without getting a single match… mission accomplished🫡
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u/Ras_AlHim 4d ago
The cope on here in trying to argue that his age range, which nobody but him can see, is somehow responsible for him not getting anything is craaazy
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u/LesDoggo 4d ago
Let’s see the profile.
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u/Mountain-Elk8133 4d ago
There ya go
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u/AdagioHead9263 4d ago
ain't no way, you live in an isolated area? seriously your profile ain't bad at all, it's rough bro.
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u/naked_avenger 4d ago
The second pic should be your first pic. Your final pic can be your second pic. Your prompts aren't exciting but they're fine. You just really need to maximize the best shot for that first pic.
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u/Mountain-Elk8133 4d ago
Ill dm if its ok? I am not seeing your profile as open to dms.
Dm me if you want to see it
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u/LesDoggo 4d ago
I’ll be honest with you, it’s not a great profile. Several of the photos should be swapped and your prompts will only resonate with a few people. Depending on where you live, lack of political information may hurt your appeal as well.
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u/Delicious-Ad2528 4d ago
Had the same happen to me but I was in a small, isolated town. I was actually getting likes from people in a neighboring state, hours away
I eventually moved away to a medium-sized but still isolated area. I havent seen this screen since
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u/flyboi320 4d ago
If I adjust them between 30-50 I have countless matches especially over 40 and I’m 26. There aren’t many younger women as I swiped all of them and I live in a big city
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u/The_Blue_Kitty 4d ago
I saw your profile. Maybe it's the religious part that you're having trouble with. Which is fine because you're weeding out women who don't share your views. Your photos are very good. Idk why you're not getting more matches.
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u/Consistent_Net_2540 4d ago
Bro, be a man. 18-80 is the only acceptable age filter for us.
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u/dilemma900 4d ago
Yeah that happens a lot. Don't buy premium, and just swipe on your downtime.
The only postitve thing about actually going through the whoe list, if someone new does pop up, you see them immediately and get first pickens LOL...
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u/Jeroclo 4d ago
But you are still on Bumble, so you actually lost.