r/Bumble • u/Aegon95 • Jun 16 '26
Rant Women, please stop doing this.
Honestly, I would rather see you have no bio than see this.
The bio prompts exist so that people get to know you better, deter people who might not be a good match, hell, might even be a good topic opener.
If I'm seeing dry / one word bios, I'm expecting the same amount of effort in our conversation if we match (and honestly, from my experience, the same amount of effort on a date), which is a HUGE turn off.
I will swipe left faster than my screen's refresh rate can handle anytime I see one of those bios.
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u/haleorshine Jun 16 '26
When I see this, I'm never swiping on that person, no matter how hot they are. It tells you that they're either incredibly lazy and will be so as a partner, or not actually interested in getting dates, for whatever reason.
Obligatory: nobody of any gender should do this. I've seen dudes post their profile that looks like this, and bemoan their lack of matches and the fact that women must be superficial, and I'm always like "So not only are you lazy, you're also an idiot, because anybody with half a brain can see immediately the reason nobody is matching on you."
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u/ValBravora048 Jun 16 '26 edited Jun 16 '26
mfing thank you
As a dude, if I say this I get downvoted and/or shouted down to hell
And my GOD, some of these guys clearly absolutely pathetic rationales
”ONLY looks matter!”
”Nobody reads a bio!”
”Women/the 1% of chads dont have to etc etc”
Its embarrassing AS a dude and it’s WORSE when they try to convince you how smart and “realistic” they’re being about all of it, like the gddm ”math” about swiping right on every woman
Like fing no wonder women don’t bother with you. It’s a matter of time before people in general don’t either if it hasn’t already happened
31
u/ceylon-tea Jun 16 '26
I don’t understand the people who post in this and similar subs for profile feedback and then fight all the feedback. “Bio doesn’t matter” “these are the only pics I have and I can’t take more” ok then why did you post
10
u/No_Sign1666 Jun 16 '26
Yes! And i get that it's frustrating, but yes you can! You can buy a tripod to take pictures on your oen if your friends are not good at taking pictures. Hell I carried a small brick as a backstop for my phone when i couldn't get one.
And the irritating part is that they have a lot of things to stay about their experience that genuinely suck. And it sucks for all of us (definetly more for some), but self imposed powerlessnes cannot be helped and it turns every conversation into a negative one as they externalise their problems.
Further more it affects all of us, how we precive others in the app, as well, i was scared for a while going out taking pictures with out a friend, exactly because of this powerlessness narrative I have seen in spaces where i would go for advice.
Sorry for the rent
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u/ValBravora048 Jun 16 '26
No legit mate, I feel the same way
I made post here suggesting that if guys put forward where they were, we could get together and take photos of each other. Maybe make it a genuine social thing.
Except for a couple guys, the amount of men who SHAT on that for being awkward or “gay”
I got reached out by a couple guys who were in my area and we arranged to meet up … and then they fing ghosted? One is still pretty active in this sub complaining about women having too high standards. Guy cant make an effort for himself but expects more from women…
And F me, let’s not even talk about making male friends via BFF. I’ve gone from thinking about the “male loneliness epidemic” to realising it’s largely self-fing inflicted by self-centred man children who dont want friends so much as they want a fantasy with them at the centre. Can you image how they treat women?
3
u/ceylon-tea Jun 16 '26
100%! Use a tripod and/or self timer mode! Take a video and choose a screenshot! Sure it's annoying but it's not that hard
3
u/SauterelleArgent Jun 16 '26
I’m assuming these people don’t have friends or think they will be ridiculed for being on a dating site by them.
Seriously get your friends on side, pictures of your friends having fun are nice to have!
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u/haleorshine Jun 16 '26
All the studies that I've read indicate that women are much more likely to open a profile before swiping yes (and this has been my experience as a woman interested in all genders - women are much more likely to read my profile than men), but these dudes are so hell bent on thinking that the reason they don't get any matches is looks.
I guess so that they don't have to actually think about how their personality is the problem, and do any work to make themselves less odious.
13
u/AppealMammoth8950 Jun 16 '26
Yup. Dude here. Posted my bumble stats here (1100 incoming yes, 6900 incoming no) and the dudes were like "you must be a 9/10 at least!". Told them Im at best maybe a 6 or 7 lol. I just put effort in my prompts, and have well taken photos. They couldnt fathom the fact that you dont have to be a model to have an interesting profile. A lot of cope in the comments.
4
u/haleorshine Jun 16 '26
Anything to be able to blame women and to not have to consider making changes to the things they can change. And like, I know that there are more guys on the apps, so even for the guys that try, it's harder. But the apps are just full of these lazy profiles where it's honestly feels like guys are hoping to get no matches so they can complain about how unreasonable women are for... Only swiping on people they actually want to date.
3
u/Old_Smrgol Jun 16 '26
Yup.
"But these are the only photos I have!" So read about photography for half an hour, buy a $30 phone tripod, put on a nice shirt, put a couple more nice shirts in the car, go to the park, get better photos.
Like, are you trying to get matches or not?
5
u/ValBravora048 Jun 16 '26
100%
A few guys here and IRL have raged at me along the lines of how “They don’t have TIME to read every profile” while spending quite a lot swiping every single profile. Then more raging about how much they’ve been rejected or not given FAIR consideration etc
Like if they had a chance before, it’s certainly become diminished because how they use the apps and how much time they give to it
I would have sympathy if they were really hurting but honestly, it’s them hurting themselves, insisting on hurting themselves, and then inflicting that misery as a result on the rest of us. For all their rationalising, it’s fing staggering how many refuse to see it any other way than suits them and how gddm fing unattractive that is
5
u/haleorshine Jun 16 '26
There are so many guys who indiscriminately swipe and then sort through the options when they've matched with people, and it ruins it for guys who actually read profiles, because a lot of women (myself included) assume a guy isn't interested until he's shown specific interest in you.
I also think it would make them be less prioritised on the apps, if they're deleting or ghosting 99% of their matches.
5
u/SauterelleArgent Jun 16 '26
As a woman I get many messages from men who open with either ‘where are you located’ or ‘what are you looking for on here’
The answer to both of these questions are on my profile ffs.
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u/Tall_Boysenberry533 Jun 16 '26
Maybe it’s a test , they already know where you’re at , live .
They could be looking for a natural reaction from you , that helps eliminating bad judgements . If you say kindly I am from Detroit or wherever , it’s in my
Profile you must have missed it …. Then they will possibly think you’re easy going and not argumentative when you start getting comfortable or being your natural self .
Could be wrong tho .
I know for sure if I overlooked your profile and was looking at your pics , no matter how hot you were , I would pass .
The first things guy look at are pics , and yes , it’s a dumb question to ask where are you from ….. but is it1
u/Automatic_Horse9290 Jun 16 '26
ll the studies that I've read indicate that women are much more likely to open a profile before swiping yes.
That's a disingenuous breakdown. You've explained it yourself in the first sentence : before swiping Yes.
So yeah a potential Yes can be turned a No by a bad bio, or lack of. But majority of NOs are pre-determined.
but these dudes are so hell bent on thinking that the reason they don't get any matches is looks.
Sure, stats are amazing. Somehow people with best personalities, happen to also be the most attractive ones.
2
u/haleorshine Jun 16 '26
Yeah, you have to be passable to get somebody to open up your profile to find out if they want to sleep with you, but PLENTY of not conventionally attractive guys can get matches, they just need to put a tiny bit of effort in.
Take nice pictures where you're not unkempt, where you're smiling and looking at the camera to show your face, and you'll be better than the vast majority of dudes on the apps.
Or you can put zero effort in and blame women for only swiping on people they actually want to date and dreaming of going back to the world where being a single woman is so hard people just choose the least worst dude, so you can get an unhappy wife by default.
1
u/Glad-Philosopher-235 Jun 16 '26
😂 Trying to rationalise the most superficial app in the world is hilarious. Your ' Put down' of that rationalisation and creating some dumb lamenting about it is equally sad.
Either get good bio pics, make it interesting and try and roughly follow the algos hidden rule OR (this is 100x better), be social IRL and skip the hoeflation and stupidity of online dating.
My advice would be to not take anything about these apps to heart, and run them passively.
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u/Next-Ad-1504 Jun 16 '26
Yes this is true for any gender, I swipe left on men all the time for not putting effort into their profile, no matter how attractive they may look. Skimpy or lack of bios just tell me you’re not looking for anything serious you’re just probably looking for someone to chat with here and there and meet up for hookup. But 9/10 you’ll get less opportunity for a hookup with a low effort profile anyway
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0
Jun 16 '26
22
u/haleorshine Jun 16 '26
I think it makes even less sense when it happens with men because the stats say that there are more men on the apps and that women are more picky about who they will swipe on. You've got to be guaranteeing you get no matches, whereas if this woman isn't ugly, she'll get some matches. Shitty matches, that are only interested in sex probably, but she'll get some.
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Jun 16 '26
-2
Jun 16 '26
1
u/Equivalent_Doubt319 Jun 16 '26
Yeah but your premise is wrong, on what planet is the quality the same for men and women on dating apps?
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Jun 16 '26
6
u/haleorshine Jun 16 '26
I've seen similar posts, and I swear the "Women don't read profiles" nonsense is so baffling! From everything I've read, women are much more likely to open a profile and read it than men.
Also, from my own anecdotal experience, when I swipe left on a guy without reading their profile, it's not because they're inherently unattractive, it's because they've chosen photos that show how little they care. I'm immediately swiping left on some guy who's profile picture is him unsmiling, unkempt, with sunglasses in a car selfie. This is his BEST foot forward, and it shows that he's lazy and grumpy. No thanks.
3
u/TENTAtheSane Jun 16 '26
Well, i do try to put effort into mine, and often rotate them out for stuff in different styles for some quick A/B testing xD
But it's pointless since I've never, not even a single time, received a response or like for any of my written prompts. The few incoming likes i get are just for my photos, without even an accompanying message. (This is mostly on Hinge, where it's a bit easier to see this; but if that's the case on the app most geared towards responding to prompts, I would be surprised if it weren't the case on the others as well)
1
u/ch4insmoker Jun 16 '26
Maybe I'm just dumb but like 90% of the prompts are shitty for "getting to know someone" on any significant level.
0
u/cmbtmstr Jun 16 '26
Maybe they’re in the top percent of men getting all the matches so those men can act like women and go low effort on the prompts?
1
u/haleorshine Jun 16 '26
I see a decent amount of guys who aren't particularly conventionally attractive who have nothing of substance in their profile
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u/Middle-Gas-6532 Jun 16 '26
Unfortunately for a man, there might not be, and for most there isn't a next one to move to.
4
u/AlpsHelpful1292 Jun 16 '26
Are you saying this one particular woman might be a man’s only chance at a match?
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u/finnishd Jun 16 '26
Nobody with a profle like this is going to give you a good conversation, and without that you will not get a date.
So, common as they are, you really are wasting your time trying to match them.
Yes its common, yes it is annoying, but online dating has.many double standards and you can't fight them.
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u/Tattoos_and_Tea Jun 16 '26
Just swipe left lol. There are shitty low effort profiles from both genders. Don’t dwell on it and swipe right until you find someone you do like.
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Jun 16 '26
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u/Tattoos_and_Tea Jun 16 '26
They then should stop complaining and work on themselves
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Jun 16 '26
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u/LordOuranos Jun 16 '26
So you make it men's problem.
Women like you and above are why im happy im bisexual. Like damn, everything is men's problem.
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u/ExcitingPhase944 Jun 16 '26
You’re definitely right. Relationships between men and women aren’t fair and never will be. Lamenting on the inequalities is kinda wasting your time.
1
u/ViewHead5600 Jun 18 '26
you're just like the person in the post, adding nothing to the conversation
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u/SomeInternetGuitar Jun 16 '26
These are not low effort profiles. These are low effort people. No amount of profile building will change the fact that they are… boring people
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u/Tattoos_and_Tea Jun 16 '26
Then just don’t swipe on them lol I don’t swipe on people with profiles like that.
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Jun 16 '26
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u/CautionCuriously Jun 16 '26
This! When I was still on dating apps guys would have profiles like this and then have their description saying "I'm never on here" or "I don't check the app". Bro, why are you here lol.
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u/bizk55 Jun 16 '26
Your advice should be to tell men to stop swiping right on these women. They're doing this because they get swarms of men matching them regardless of what they write. I'm saying this as man.
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u/sidirhfbrh Jun 16 '26
Telling the 80% of guys with a 3% hit rate to swipe less essentially amounts to telling them to just delete the app. It’s like telling someone looking for a needle in a haystack to just pull 1 piece of hay a day and expecting that’s somehow going to improve their results. It’s not, it doesn’t work that way.
And before I get any pushback on my percentages - 3% might actually be very generous - once you account for bots/adult content funnels, free meal chasers, and women that match and never reply.
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u/bizk55 Jun 16 '26
Ok, well none of those men get to complain about low effort women when they do match then
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Jun 17 '26
0
u/bizk55 Jun 17 '26
Sorry mate, if you can't accept your place in reinforcing this behaviour then that's what you're gonna see. You're behaviour reinforces theirs and vice versa in a race to the bottom. That's reality. No one's making you do this.
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u/sidirhfbrh Jun 17 '26
Yes they do - it’s not low effort to have to swipe 30x as much, or deal with non responders, bots and adult content subscriber farmers. Swiping less doesn’t solve any of these obstacles whatsoever. Use your head.
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u/staticdresssweet Jun 16 '26
Zero effort. Easiest "no" ever on these apps, thankfully they save me time.
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u/jessypunish Jun 16 '26
The "nothing" answers are the worst because they provide zero leverage for a first message. It feels like they're trying to be edgy or mysterious but it just comes off as lazy.
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u/Ok_Doughnut3700 Jun 16 '26
Yeah, it makes me feel like they'll be annoyed if i message them. Gives a "i dont want to be here" energy off
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u/Positive-Ro3 Jun 16 '26
It is not just women that do this. The majority of men’s bios haven’t even made it to one word answers.
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u/madcheco Jun 16 '26
At least the ones you see have words in!! Not just " . " or " x "
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u/Dramatic_Night_4122 Jun 16 '26
People like this are usually the same ones who put "Don't be boring" in their bios.
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u/itsthejasper1123 Jun 16 '26
I thought this was a mans profile.
Regardless of gender, the lack of effort is just so boring. I promise, anyone who thinks they are attractive enough to not put any in - you aren’t
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u/LuckyBlonde777 Jun 16 '26
I automatically swipe left on any guy who puts zero effort into his profile. If there’s no bio or it’s some version of “ask me”, NOPE. No effort in a profile = no effort in a connection
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u/Adept_Librarian_7001 Jun 16 '26
That is a your red flag mate. Swipe left and thank yourself later!
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u/throwaway8675-309 Jun 16 '26
Ikr
What do you bring to the table "I am the table"
Ok and I am the Storm that is Approaching
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u/ValentineAllMine Jun 16 '26
If you think this is bad you should see men’s profiles
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u/saraistrange Jun 16 '26
Men do this too 💀 "The quickest way to my heart is: tHrOuGh My ChEsT" or in the bio "anything u wanna know just ask" etc etc.
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u/TheEPGFiles Jun 16 '26
Conversations are like pulling teeth anyway, I don't have the patience anymore, being an interesting conversationalist is a two way street, if I have to do all the work guess what!
You're missing out on me, I'm not missing out on me, I don't have the time or patience for boring people anymore and if I'm going to be bored, I'd rather be bored alone.
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u/Secret-Papaya5129 Jun 16 '26
My guess is this woman thinks she’s attractive enough to not need to put any effort in her bio