r/AskUK • • 13h ago

Serious Answers Only Girlfriend has been diagnosed with aggressive cancer - how do I isolate myself effectively?

903 Upvotes

Title says it all, my girlfriend has been diagnosed with a very aggressive form of cancer at 24, and will undergo very extensive chemo and surgery to try combat its rapid growth and continued spread.

We do not live together, she will have to isolate fully whilst undergoing her treatment and thankfully lives rurally with her parents so is safe from contact that could give her flu, cold etc - the current outlier is me.

I’m currently not working, having quit my recent role last month. But I am due to start a new role in January which is 5 days a week in parliament. I’m worried this is going to become an issue and cause me to not be able to see and support her despite vaccinations.

I guess my question is, do I whilst my girlfriend has this treatment move out of London to my parents house rurally and take a remote/part time role that minimises contact to be able to support, or be slightly selfish and continue in this new role and limit contact.

I don’t want anyone telling me off or being nasty please - this is a genuine ask for advice on a new situation that’s difficult for someone who is also 24.


r/AskUK • • 8h ago

How are British people so resistant to the cold? Is it something you get used to from childhood?

286 Upvotes

Hi everyone!

It’s been almost 4 years since I moved to the UK. I come from a country in southeastern Europe where we have all four seasons, including proper winters!

But one thing that genuinely shocked me when I first moved here was how people dress during winter or on cold days.

I came here as a student, and I remember walking around wearing about 10 layers, thermals, wool, everything, while seeing other students in shorts and T-shirts! I still see this all the time, and it amazes me.

And the funny thing is, I wouldn’t even consider myself someone who feels the cold more than the average person. Even people who dress normally for winter seem to wear far fewer layers than I do.

So I’m genuinely curious, is this something British people get used to from childhood? Do you actually not feel the cold as much, or do you just learn to tolerate it?

The reason I’m even more curious now is that I have a baby, and I’m wondering how this whole thing works. Is it something similar to Scandinavian countries, like Denmark, where children are encouraged to spend time outdoors in cold weather from a young age? Or is it completely unrelated?

I’d love to hear your thoughts because after almost 4 years here, I’m still freezing while someone next to me is wearing shorts!


r/AskUK • • 13h ago

Just pulled a muscle in my back wiping my bum. What's your worst injury from doing something simple?

551 Upvotes

As the title suggests. Injury from the most mundane of tasks.


r/AskUK • • 9h ago

what is a small thing that instantly makes you distrust someone?

251 Upvotes

I was chatting to a bloke at work last week and he mentioned he never returns his shopping trolley to the bay, just leaves it wherever. He said it like it was no big deal but I found myself judging him way harder than I probably should have. It got me thinking about the little things people do that quietly tell you something about them. Maybe it is someone who is rude to waiting staff, or who talks over you constantly, or who never says thank you. Curious what yours is and whether it is something you have always noticed or picked up over time.


r/AskUK • • 10h ago

Why is turning the heating on so taboo in the UK?

285 Upvotes

The obvious answer that we might reasonably jump to is the cost-of-living crisis.

However, having lived in the UK for a decent number of years now, I've noticed a clear pattern in how people approach indoor heating, based on conversations with work colleagues, local friends, acquaintances, and others.

I completely understand the struggle with bills faced by low-income households and the desire to save on utilities. However, the people I've met and spoken to are generally relatively well-off and can afford to splurge on luxuries and non-essentials without having to compromise on necessities or worry too much about budgeting.

Yet they'd rather layer up than even consider turning the heating on for a short while. What's the backstory behind this mentality? Do some people grow up with a sort of parental-induced complex, having been shamed or scolded for wanting a functioning radiator or a warm home as children? Or is it simply stinginess? Or is there more to it?

It seems ironic, given how cold it can get here and how many older homes are built to retain heat.


r/AskUK • • 13h ago

Selfridges delivered two 36-piece dinnerware sets with shattered plates and glasses. Two weeks later, they’re still asking me to photograph every broken piece. Is this reasonable?

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468 Upvotes

I ordered two 36-piece dinnerware sets from Selfridges to complement a set I already owned, so I could have matching tableware for 12 people.

Both sets arrived with substantial damage. Multiple plates and glasses were shattered, with broken pieces throughout the packaging.

I took photographs documenting the damage and contacted Selfridges.

Given the amount of sharp broken crockery and glass, I wasn’t willing to unpack every single item and sort through the fragments to produce an individual inventory. I have young children at home, and handling all that broken glass seemed like an unnecessary safety risk.

I disposed of the damaged items after documenting them.

Fast-forward more than two weeks, and Selfridges is still asking for additional photographs of every damaged piece.

On October 25, they asked me to provide:

  • A list of all damaged items from both sets
  • Individual photographs showing each damaged piece
  • An overall photograph of the contents, if possible

I explained that I had already disposed of the broken items, why it was unsafe to keep handling them, and that I had supplied photographs documenting the damage.

I also explained that while the stainless steel cutlery survived, having incomplete sets of matching dinnerware defeats the purpose of my purchase.

Today, October 27, I received another response from Selfridges Customer Service Management, again asking for clear photographs of each damaged set before they could proceed.

At this point, I’m genuinely struggling to understand what they expect me to do.

Was I supposed to keep boxes of shattered crockery and glass in my house for weeks, anticipating that customer service might eventually ask me to photograph every fragment individually?

I understand that retailers need evidence to verify damage claims, and I’m not suggesting they should issue refunds without any documentation.

But I’ve already provided multiple photographs showing extensive damage, explained what was broken, and clarified why the remaining pieces don’t meet the purpose of the purchase.

I’m not asking for anything extraordinary — just a reasonable resolution to an order that arrived substantially damaged.

Am I being unreasonable here? Has anyone else experienced this with Selfridges? And how did you eventually get it resolved?

I’ve attached photographs of the damage and screenshots of the relevant customer service responses so people can judge for themselves.


r/AskUK • • 10h ago

What common phrase makes you irrationally angry?

190 Upvotes

We all have them, those phrases that someone will say and you just feel your teeth ache and hitting the person who said it seems to be the only correct response.

For me it is 'oh such and such a thing is to die for!''.

'Oh Cynthia's homemade beetroot and feta hummus is to die for!'. No it isn't, it's not religious freedom or a right to a free and fair democracy is it. It's just mashed up chickpeas.

What about you?

Edit: I wish I hadn't posted this now as I am even more furious with all of these examples. I didn't realise there were so many phrases I hate.


r/AskUK • • 8h ago

What weird thing did you do as a child that makes no sense to you when you think back on it?

110 Upvotes

I lived in a cul-de-sac as a kid that had a bit of waste ground that we all used to play on. I remember once we saw some older kids that we didn’t recognise and for some reason I immediately hated them. To garner support from the other local kids in my random hatred I decided to spell out “fuck you” out of some discarded bricks and blame it on the older kids. Not only did it not get me the support I had hoped, I distinctly remember everyone thinking it was cool and rebellious that they’d done it and resourceful that they’d used the random old bricks laying around. Literally zero idea what my thought process was for any of this


r/AskUK • • 19h ago

Which UK celebrities died in unusual circumstances?

491 Upvotes

In 1984, comedian Tommy Cooper collapsed from a heart attack aged 63 in front of 12 million viewers midway through his act on the variety show Live from Her Majesty's, transmitted live from Her Majesty's Theatre in London. His last words were "thank you, love" to the assistant, seconds before collapsing. The assistant smiled at him as he slumped down, believing that it was part of the act. Likewise, the audience laughed as he fell backwards.

Also in 1984, comic legend Eric Morecambe, after receiving six curtain calls and playing around with musical instruments to a rapturous audience at a theatre in Gloucestershire, shouted "That's your lot!" and walked off stage. Moments after stepping into the wings, he collapsed from a severe heart attack. He was 58.

Children's entertainer Rod Hull fell to his death in 1999 aged 63 after taking Gyles Brandreth's advice and climbing a ladder to adjust his TV aerial.

Singer Kirsty MacColl, who famously duetted on Christmas classic Fairytale of New York, was surfacing from a scuba dive in Mexico in 2000 and pushed her son out of the path of a speeding powerboat. The boat struck her, and the propeller caused severe head and chest injuries. She was 41.

Crimewatch presenter Jill Dando was mysteriously gunned down aged 37 outside her front door in West London in 1999. The crime remains unsolved.

Actress Natasha Richardson (daughter of Vanessa Redgrave and wife of Liam Neeson) died aged 49 in New York in 2009 after she fell during a beginner's ski lesson in Quebec. She complained of a headache but initially refused medical treatment.

ELO cellist Mike Edwards died aged 62 when a bale of hay crushed his van on a motorway in Devon in 2010.

Any others?


r/AskUK • • 11h ago

Are you in a mixed (northern and southern) relationship and does it create misunderstandings?

102 Upvotes

The most wonderful North-South miscommunication we've had to date happened this evening. My husband is Southern and uses long A's, I used short. Conversation happened roughly like this:

H: The medal was made of horse brahss

W: Horse bras?

H: Whores bras?!

W: Horses don't wear bras

H: HORSE BRASSS

What's your biggest misunderstandings?


r/AskUK • • 8h ago

Serious Answers Only What do you consider the single best British TV character ever created?

54 Upvotes

For me, it is Captain Mainwaring of Dad’s Army. What makes him different to other comic characters is that he is three dimensional. Basil Fawlty, Del Boy, David Brent. They are all fairly one dimensional characters, Del Boy perhaps having an occasional more depth than the other two (he is better in the early to mid series later on he just becomes completely a caricature).

Mainwaring in contrast is only a few times turned up of the real type of people that did exist. He has an unhappy marriage, a class envy of Wilson, and yet in all of it, he isn’t written as a fool (pompous and a blusterer, but he is still well meaning) He is still a very brave person and at times sympathetic (to the point that his rivals such as Captain Square and Warden Hodges come across more unlikeable).

I think British TV has forgotten a bit how to make characters comic figures, without making them complete clowns in every single thing they do.

It is almost a uniquely well written TV series, as arguably each of the main characters, you could craft a show around, it has that much depth.


r/AskUK • • 9h ago

Serious Answers Only Is Reddit heading the same direction as Twitter did?

62 Upvotes

Is it just me, or is Reddit heading the same direction as Twitter did?

Back in the day, Twitter used to be great and then the bots, grifters, "influencers" and every other sewer-dweller got involved and it became unusable (for me at least).

Is Reddit heading the same way?

It seems the majority of posts are more thinly-veiled attempts to rile everyone up and keep folk in a perma-rage, and I'm wondering if it's time to ditch it.


r/AskUK • • 11h ago

Do people actually shop in Peacocks?

71 Upvotes

I live in a small run down town and the only choices for children’s clothes are really Next, Peacocks or pep and co. My kid needed a new winter coat as her zipper broke this morning and she requested pink.. I went into Peacocks and they had a mediocre quality pink coat for £24, so I decided to look in Next and they had a plush, beautiful pink coat with unicorns and other creatures on for £26, so I went with that. I also noted that their other children’s clothing was comparable in price (£7 for leggings or £8/£9 for a long sleeves t-shirt), so with Next offering superior quality for the same price, who the hell is keeping Peacocks open?


r/AskUK • • 18h ago

Is British humour a coping mechanism?

259 Upvotes

Hello, Dutchman here who's trying to understand something quintessential.

As much as I love British humour, I have noticed a rather dark side to it. Oftentimes it can come over as self-deprecating, degrading or downright pessimistic.

Someone's house will be on fire and you'll hear someone say that it is a "bit of a mishap". Rain will be pouring down and people just go "lovely weather, isn't it?" Or what about the famous "can't park there mate" when somebody has driven their vehicle into absolute ruins.

To me, it's as if a bad situation is a prerequisite to the punchline, which then acts as means to soften to blow. In a way British humor feels like a social glue that holds everything together. How can that be the case? Why is it so deeply embedded into society? It's not all doom and gloom in the UK is it?

Am I valid in thinking this or have I totally misread what British humour is?


r/AskUK • • 3h ago

Serious Answers Only Has anyone ever left their own big city (Glasgow, Edinburgh, Manchester, etc) because they can't find a job there?

13 Upvotes

Very much an unemployable sunfish right now and I'm wondering if it's normal people have left bigger cities to find a job elsewhere? I can understand leaving small places like South Cerny, Cerny Wick, Bourton-On-The-Water, but big cities?

Also, if someone could share this into the Glasgow subReddit which won't left me post for some reason that'd be great.


r/AskUK • • 11h ago

Serious Answers Only How is it acceptable to blast scripture on loud speaker on the street?

57 Upvotes

Just walking trough Oxford Circus and there’s a Quran stand blasting the Quran on loudspeakers loud enough so that you can hear it for several minutes after walking past it. I know there isn’t a law against that but is so something being done about this? Can security be notified? Surely it breaches some kind of policy.

How is it socially acceptable to be subjected to any religious preaching, especially using speakers to enhance to the wider public? This applies for all faiths btw.

This has made me really uncomfortable as any religion is a deeply personal matter that shouldn’t be promoted on the streets. I think it also negatively impacts the image of the followers/community as a whole.


r/AskUK • • 4h ago

What is your most traumatic spider story ?

15 Upvotes

I've been bit by a false widow whilst cleaning out a garden shed that got infected and then i had to have surgery and it left me with a scar..but that wasn't the worse one..the worse one was a good few years back on a hot summers night..i was chatting to a friend outside his house when I spotted a huge spider walking past my feet..i thought nothing of it because it was heading towards the wall of his house..so i just carried on chatting away for about another 10/15 minutes when I felt somthing underneath my chin..i knew straight away it was that spider and i should of kept an eye on it 🤣

I think then i woke his whole street up..screaming the place down..i managed to grab it & chuck it quick..but the fact that it climbed all the way up me from the floor to my chin still haunts me to this day 🤣


r/AskUK • • 8h ago

How do I deal with massive Hornet that seems to want to shower with me every morning?

29 Upvotes

So a week ago I got in the shower and pulled the curtain round me , and a huge hornet, seriously over 2 and a half inches long, crawled off the curtain and got involved with every stage of my showering. Washing my face, it was on my forehead. Washing my hair, it sat on my shoulder. Sponging my feet, it was on my hand.

Not gonna lie I was terrified every second that it would sting me, but I had to shower, had to get ready for work, so mind over matter, I pushed through. Applying body lotion post-shower, this thing sat on the towel on top of my head that I wrapped my hair up in.. when I took the towel off it flew off back onto the shower curtain again. I shut the bathroom door, went to work, came home fully loaded with insect spray and entered the bathroom in full battle mode. No sign of it anywhere.

Repeat for the next 7 days.. This massive black and yellow tw*t hides somewhere in the bathroom in the evenings and yet every single morning, it’s back in the shower with me 😳 Sometimes it just watches from its nook in the shower curtain, spying on me. Sometimes it actively participates in my shower routine, invading my personal space, getting in my hair or sitting on my arm or leg.. it disappears when I return to the bathroom with the intention of hunting it down and Raid spraying the b*stard thing into oblivion.

It’s never stung me yet, but I live in constant fear that one day, it will 😩

How do I resolve this? Am I just stuck sharing my morning shower with a Hornet 🐝 now, until either I can outwit it, or it dies of natural causes?

I may actually be getting quite fond of it now. Possibly a form of shower Stockholm Syndrome. ..


r/AskUK • • 20m ago

How much do you NEED a smartphone for daily life?

• Upvotes

I am getting fed up of having to use a smartphone for everything:

to pay a normal price for things with loyalty cards

to use the gym(yep not allowed in unless you’ve booked online)

to bank

to buy stuff generally - if you buy direct from shops you often pay more as you miss out on constant sales and as different things go on sale at different times you have to keep checking. I miss when sales were at set times or year. Plus the best second hand stuff is now online too.

customer service for anything and some companies reply hours later/slowly as they are on several chats at once.

It has really accelerated in the last few years. Inused to take smartphone breaks(usually when I broke my phone) but it would be hard now

Sometimes it is more convenient , sometimes just annoying(.


r/AskUK • • 15h ago

Are hotels asking for a tip when you check out the new norm?

84 Upvotes

Last week I stayed at a hotel in Newcastle.

When I checked out the desk clerk asked if I would like to leave a tip of 7.5 % of my bill for the "behind the scenes staff".

Is this a new Thing? Never happened to me before. It seemed rather cheeky.


r/AskUK • • 1d ago

Casual What should I use my cupboard for? Silly answers only

Post image
1.5k Upvotes

Just got a kitchen installed. Husband suggested a picture of Ainsley Harriot. Doesn't seem terrifying enough.


r/AskUK • • 14h ago

Do you guys have accessible footpaths everywhere and are your rural communities self sufficient?

62 Upvotes

As someone born, raised, and living in the US I am intrigued by and jealous of how walkable everything seems to be in the UK. I enjoy folklore, history, and ghost stories and I'm subscribed to many UK based YouTube channels. People will walk paths on moorlands just outside of town that lead to beautiful ruins, take a wooded footpath that leads from one village to another, there are old ancient roads that have been unpaved and seem to remain as an alternate walkable path to the next town...but the most fascinating thing to me is how the person will be walking along and there will be a gate that seems to be the boundary for someone's private meadow or field and the footpaths continue through the them! You can just open the unlocked gate and continue on your way! Here you'll get a hefty fine, jail time, or shot for trespassing if you're not careful.

I live in upstate NY and a few years ago the state completed the Erie Canalway which is a 360 mile bike/footpath that follows much of the old canal from Buffalo to Albany, so we at least have that...there are a lot of places where it runs on or adjacent to busy multi-lane highways ...but it's not like we have multiple paths to choose from that are available to us here that lead anywhere and even if there were I'd be walking for a couple days before I find a small town that has more to offer than a gas station and Dollar General if it even had that. And that's another thing, I never see corporate entities in your small villages, if there is anything to ge offered it all seems to be independently owned. I once lived in a small village in the NY Delaware River valley that had a grocery store, but if I wanted anything other than the overpriced food they had available I would have to travel 45 minutes into Pennsylvania to get to the nearest Walmart...And I never see cars on your one lane country roads! Or even cars driving in villages! Just a few occasional cars parked here and there.

Is this really how it is to live in the UK or am I just looking through rose tinted glasses? Could you walk the entirety of your country on these footpaths and country lanes? And do people who live in small villages have to travel far for necessities? Sorry for the waffling and thank you in advance!


r/AskUK • • 18h ago

Casual When is a time you were mistaken for an employee or have you been a manager and received a complaint about someone who didn’t work there?

110 Upvotes

I’ll go first.

In 2017, I worked in an office about a 7 minute walk from a shopping centre that had a Debenhams in. One day I needed to pop out on my lunch break to pick up my foundation (the same one I had been using, so a relatively quick errand).

It was autumn so I was wearing a coat, which I then loosened as I got inside, and I was carrying my handbag.

I get up to the appropriate counter, and it’s one of those where all of the testers are on display and you have to ask the sales assistant to get the one for you to purchase from drawers which they need a key to open. The one sales assistant is already with a customer so I stand about a meter behind that customer at the till point.

Out of the corner of my right eye, I see a woman who is really trying to get someone’s attention. Shes waving her arms, she loudly saying “over here“. This goes on for a few minutes, and I’m surprised the person who’s attention she is trying to get has not realised, so I looked to my left to see who she’s trying to signal to. There’s no one there and as I turn my head back slightly to the right, she has come a little closer and I realise that the persons attention who she is trying to get is me.

She says “I’ll be really quick, I know what I want“ (implying that she just wants me to open the drawer and hand her the make up that she’s after).

I then reply “I don’t work here“, to which she responds “oh, you can’t help me”.

Great, she’s understood- I don’t work here, I can’t help her.

Sales Assistant becomes free, I ask for my foundation, purchase it and turn to leave.

As I’m walking away, I can hear this lady complaining to the sales assistant, saying that she doesn’t understand why I couldn’t have just helped her and asking what department I’m from.

I chuckled to myself imagining how far her complaint went and her reaction if/ when they told her that I do not work there and I was just another customer (or if they just didn’t look into it and sent an email around telling all staff to help customers even if you don’t work in that department).

I was thinking about this the other day and wondered if anyone else has stories, either from the companies point of view, explaining to complainants that the person they are complaining about doesn’t work there; or if anyone else has funny “yeah I don’t work here“ moments.


r/AskUK • • 14h ago

Serious Answers Only The “weird” / quiet / bullied kid in secondary school, where are you now?

50 Upvotes

I was mute in secondary school, I was called John Doe on my last day. It was the worst time of my life because I was also struggling at home too.

Im in second year of university now, and have improved my social anxiety considerably since then, but I now struggle with depression and hyper-vigilance.

I wonder about those who were in a similar position to me, how has life been like after secondary school?


r/AskUK • • 15h ago

Serious Answers Only What is the best way to survive the British Winter?

60 Upvotes

Through no one's fault but my own, this is the first British winter in my adulthood that I will be exposed to the elements. Have no car, can't afford a car or much of anything at this current juncture and I am now a bus or pavement princess getting to work.

Work is a 50-minute walk from my house and if it's dry, I tend to walk it however, over the course of the last week, the weather has drastically turned and have found myself getting the bus however, the bus stop is a 10-minute walk from my house and once I get off the bus, it's another 15 minute walk to work. I end up soaked even in my long jacket.

Is it a case of bringing a change, leaving a spare pair of shoes in the office - I have an allocated desk and drawer space so this is totally feasible.

TL:DR - Basically I'm looking for survival tips for my office days in the weather.

Looking for the best budget options for footwear and jackets / trousers to not turn up to the office dripping wet in the weather.