A weekly dedicated space for members who have been trying for another for 12 or more months, experiencing infertility. Talk of treatment, testing/diagnosis, or tough feelings are welcome here. While this is a safe space to vent, please consider how other long haulers in different circumstances may feel about your words.

This thread is primarily for current long-haulers to connect with, vent to, and support each other. We ask that anyone else (including TFA grads and those whose current round of TTC has been less than 12 months) participate only to answer questions where your personal experience is relevant - for example, if someone asks about the side effects of a fertility treatment you have tried. For more general support, sympathy, and finger-crossing, in this thread, if you have not currently been trying for at least 12 months, please stick to a quiet upvote.

This thread is not meant to limit discussion only to this thread. Discussion of long haul issues is always welcome in the Daily Chat.

Just joined this group. 36 yo, have a 2 year old son, unexplained infertility. Have been trying for nearly six months (first pregnancy happened in first try) for a second child and just got bloodwork, ultrasound back. The stand out from this work was that I have very low AMH (0.367). I am really struggling to process this and almost everything I read seems open and shut that my chances are lower than I ever thought. I have been tracking with Inito from cycle 2, from that already knew my luteal phase was short and got progesterone supplementation (1 cycle with, no luck), but I’m about to start letrazole as well and it’s just so overwhelming to juggle everything (not to mention it feels like every day there’s something new that costs another chunk of $). It breaks my heart to think of how open ended this journey may be and how my little son doesn’t even know right now what he may miss out on if he doesn’t have a sibling. I waited to have kids until I was 33 and I can’t help but feel so guilty now because of the low AMH. I have so much respect for everyone who has been on this journey longer, but right now it just is so exhausting and heartbreaking. 

If you became pregnant while breastfeeding, were your symptoms the same or different than getting pregnant when you weren’t breastfeeding?

Hi !

With my (29) husband (34), we’ve been trying to conceive a second child for five months. I know it’s pretty early still to put any diagnosis… but honestly, I can’t help but feel sad and disappointed in a body which has already carried and given birth to a wonderful 2 year old boy… who was conceived during the first cycle.

I’m an only child, daughter of an only child and grand daughter of an only child. My husband and I want to have two kids (if not more) and have agreed on that early on.

And yet, I can’t help but blame myself, even if it’s still too early. We’re both trying to be chill about it but it’s a struggle still. Because I feel like my body is failing at something it had been excellent at for the first time.

My husband works at a high stress job, so do I. And honestly.. I dislike my job (a lot of pressure is put on me from management because of a single recent failed performance), where I am constantly bypassed when it comes to pay raises and micromanaged. It’s still well-paid, though.. and it gives me some bits of financial independence.

Returning to work 1,5 years ago had triggered a serious PPD and had deeply affected the way I was around my son up until I switched departments. I became pregnant with my son just 8 months in, and I’ve been working there for almost 4 years. And I regret having stayed after giving birth … but hey, we have bills to pay and finding a job is currently kinda difficult.

Everyone tells me to stay in my current company at least until I get pregnant, take a sick leave and then just quit after the maternity leave, which is 3 months long in France. But I refuse to put so much pressure on a pregnancy that almost seems to be impossible to reach just to be able to leave a job I am miserable doing. It’s not worth it. And I am questioning it all.

Should I leave, should I stay, should I just give up on becoming pregnant again ? I don’t know because I feel inadequate in everything. Work, family, motherhood.. even if it might not be the case.. not in my husband’s eyes at least.

Sorry for the grammar mistakes.

Hiya! I am 28 years old and I have 2 ~unplanned~ kids. My hubby & I are now trying for our third and final kid. I’ve been in my head since we didn’t conceive our first cycle, we are now BD’ing for the second and I believe my LH is on the verge of surging from daily testing using the Premom app. Yesterday’s LH result was 0.2 and today is 0.6. I have short, regular 21-23 day cycles and haven’t been on BC for about 7 years now. I also have thyroid issues, although a few months back my endocrinologist said my TSH is normal, gave me the green light to begin trying, and slightly increased my dosage in preparation.

Here’s the thing. I’ve been so in my head thinking of COURSE I got pregnant not really TTC with my first two, but now that I’m trying, what if I’m going to struggle? I want a specific age gap between my last and my next, and really tried to plan the timing where I’d have the most help. I was hopeful I’d just… get pregnant on the first try given I’ve obviously had no troubles before. And that didn’t happened, which is completely fine and expected, but now my mind is spiraling a little. I know I’m doing this all to myself lol.

So anyway, those of you also TTC and letting your worried thoughts lead- what have you done to help? Anything additional you did while TTC that you swear helped? Did anyone else in my shoes have similar thoughts?

We’ve been trying for baby #3 for 8 months now. Baby #1 we didn’t struggle at all, baby #2 took 5 months and a chemical to conceive. My midwife had me get an ultrasound right before ovulation this cycle to see if my eggs were maturing enough. One ovary had 25 follicles, the other had 27 follicles for a total of 52. Natural, unmedicated cycle. My mature follicle was measuring 2.7cm. We are testing progesterone this week to see if that may be the issue. Does anyone know if that many follicles is normal? Any suggestions?

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

I am 37 and had my first baby in April 2025 without fertility intervention. I had polyhydramnios during my pregnancy and ended up with an emergency c-section. My periods returned in June 2026 and we have been trying to conceive baby #2 since January 2026. I have been using Mira and/or Clear Blue Ovulation sticks to track ovulation. Thought we have been timing it well but unfortunately not yet conceived. I am desperate to give my little boy a sibling and to add to our family. I am based in the UK and have had bloods done which look good, and an trans vaginal ultrasound which looked ok save for potential endometriosis (left ovary stuck to womb - although that was a shock as I’ve never suffered with any symptoms of endo). I am looking to go private with the next steps. I am looking at either a full fertility MOT with the London Women’s Clinic or a more targeted consultant appointment with someone like Spire or the Bristol Centre for Reproductive Medicine. It’s all very expensive but I feel it’s worth it if it gives us some answers. I would be grateful if anyone has any words of advice for what we should do next?

Ugh! It took us four years and three IVF transfers (along with four chemical pregnancies) to finally have my son. While I'm not in the same mindset when I battled primary infertility, it still is such a bummer when my period comes. I guess I'm just going to sit back and expect another long journey. We only want two kids anyways but I'd be content with just one because he is such a miracle to us and truly the best little boy. I guess I'm just bummed at the thought everyone else around me can grow their family with ease but with us, it's either IVF or just keeping our toes and fingers crossed I suppose.

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

Mostly just being sarcastic out of frustration (period came yesterday) but perhaps we're not all just delusional when we symptom spot and convince ourselves we're pregnant when we're not. Besides just the obvious reason of progesterone symptoms being similar to early pregnancy symptoms...maybe there's a REASON our bodies would want us to think we're pregnant every month...like it makes us avoid risky behavior/foods/acohol or bonds us to our partners or something...even women who aren't trying to get pregnant get paranoid and have "pregnancy scares" when sexually active...I mean there has to be a reason we go through this every month 😭

Officially 12 months TTC, suspected for endo. Think my issue is implantation...gonna try baby aspirin this cycle. First RE appointment in December. I was hoping I wouldn't end up having to go that appointment because I'd get my BFP before then, but doesn't look like it's in the cards.

Just hit the one year mark of trying for #2 and feeling pretty miserable. I'm also being bombarded by pregnancy announcements and getting so grumpy about it and then hating being that person. Curious about experiences with doctors when discussing a short luteal phase. After a MMC, my OB prescribed progesterone suppositories when I became pregnant for the second time. Worked out great, he's about to turn two now, but we've since moved to a new state. I have spoken with two OBs and an RE and they all said they do not prescribe progesterone and don't care about luteal phase length. This seems to conflict with everything I've ever read about TTC...and as the months tick by, and my luteal phase consistently continues to be 8-9 days, I'm feeling really let down by the doctors who should be helping me

35F, trying for #4 since June. My first three each came within 1-4 cycles, all in my early 30s, youngest is 14 months. This time I'm 4 well-timed cycles in with nothing, and it's rattling me. I ovulate every cycle, hormones look fine on trackers, timing's been solid.

Specifically hoping to hear from people who conceived #3+ in their 30s after it took longer than before: how many cycles, and did anything turn up in testing or was it just time? Not looking for "you're not out yet" or general reassurance. Age and cycle details appreciated.

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

I have had a short luteal phase for months while gradually weaning my now 14 month old. LP seems to have gotten a day longer for every cycle and is now approximately 9-10 days long. We have been TTC for 4-5 cycles. I haven't breastfed baby since last week. My question is how long it can take for LP to extend after fully weaning and how long it has taken for people to conceive after LP has adjusted post weaning. Would appreciate to hear from anyone who has experience of this.

Note: Discussion of BFPs / ongoing pregnancies is allowed and encouraged in this thread!

A dedicated space for TFA grads to check in and keep their TFA friends updated on their journey to #2+!

If you're looking for more discussion, please head over to the gradsofTFA subreddit as well. It's a private subreddit so you can send a modmail using desktop or you can directly message moderators DreamsofCheesecake or youcango-now to be added.

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

Hi all.
I’m 37 (turn 38 in a month), 1 LC and been trying for another for about 2 years (tracking everything for 18 months). Finally managed to get my scan to check my AFC done and I’m reeling from the results.
Throughout all the waiting etc my thought process (which had been echoed by my doctor) has been “oh well, we had one baby pretty easily so at least we know it’s all working in there, it’s probably just a hormones/age thing” … oh how naive I was. 😢
My scan has come back saying I have signs of adenomyosis, suspected left ovary adhesion to the uterine wall. So the actual anatomy side of things that I was counting on working is probably not working at all. My AFC was 7 (lower end for my age) so I also feel stupid for waiting so long. Feels like I’ve wasted so many eggs trying naturally.
I’m waiting for my appt with my GP to get a specialist referral to properly discuss the results and plan next steps.
I guess I’m just here to vent/process.
I’d never even heard of adenomyosis until yesterday! Does anyone have any positive stories with it? Or with ovary adhesion?

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

I feel like I'm so obsessed with trying to improve/ protect my fertility that I'm losing my mind, meanwhile I feel like my husband couldn't care less. We've been trying to have another baby for almost 2 years now. I feel like my life revolves around doing all these little things that might help. I stress about things to probably an unhealthy degree. Some are probably reasonable and some probably aren't. For example, I only wear organic cotton and have switched many of my clothes to organic cotton, I don't wash my clothes with my husband's because I don't want the plastics from his polyester clothes to transfer to my clothes, I don't touch receipts with my bare hands, I don't wear any fragrances and got rid of all my perfumes that I loved, I try to avoid places with strong synthetic smells, I switched soaps and shampoos and dishwasher soaps and laundry detergents to products with less harsh chemicals, I dont drink out of plastic water bottles, etc. Like I made all of these little lifestyle changes in case they'll help fertility but it's kinda miserable to have to stress and keep track of everything all the time. I've also been trying to eat better, be more active, have been taking vitamins, and have scheduled all sorts of different tests and doctors appointments.

Meanwhile it feels like my husband can't really be bothered to do anything. He thinks all of my lifestyle changes are crazy, I agree that some of them maybe are, but even things that I think are more reasonable like changing to organic cotton underwear he doesn't want to do. He keeps talking about how he's gonna eat better but then the next day he tells me to go get him a pizza. I'm like hey aren't you going to eat better and he's like don't tell me what to do, get me a pizza. He says we can go to the gym together but that hasn't happened yet. He chews nicotine gums and I know nicotine addiction is hard but like he doesn't really seem to care about trying to quit nicotine.

And getting him to take vitamins is like pulling teeth. He won't take them unless I remind him because he says he forgets, but frequently when I ask him to take them he says he'll do it later and when I bring up that I'm worried he's gonna forget he gets annoyed at me. It's also really hard to get him to schedule a doctor's appointment for any sort of testing. He says it'll take too long, and I'm like well it's already been almost 2 years! He finally scheduled an appointment today after I hounded him about it for like an hour and much grumbling and groaning from him like I'm his mom telling him to do chores or something. Our sex life also isn't great, to the point where we often miss the fertile window, he seems fine going weeks without sex. I keep asking him what I can do to help get him more interested, I've done pretty much every suggestion he's made but it hasn't really seemed to help much.

You might be wondering if he even wants to have more kids? But he talks about how much he wants to have more kids all the time. Which is really frustrating for me because I want to have more kids too but I feel like most of the work and pressure to for that is on me. I've felt like crap and like it's my fault for so long and like I'm the problem. I cry pretty much every time I get my period and he acts annoyed and is like why are you crying? Idk. It took us about a year to conceieve our first child and he was a lot more helpful and supportive then. This feels so much harder now that I feel like everything is on my shoulders and like I'm all alone, and the fact that it's been almost twice as long now and we're barely having sex anymore and we have a toddler constantly interrupting us probably doesn't help.

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

I took an Ovidrel trigger shot on 10/3 around 9:30 am. This means I am either 15 or 16 DPO, depending on how long after the shot I ovulated.

No period showed up (though I had like, a super tiny for of blood when I wiped around 13DPO).

I was actually starting to feel hopeful, but was still scared to take a test because I was afraid of getting a negative.

But finally I figured I just wanted to KNOW so I took a first response test and it’s def negative.

Nearly two years of secondary infertility. Failed IVF and IUI. I’m so sad.

November will be a year of trying for our second kid, really only 8 months of active trying because we had to take a few months off because my husband who works in the medical field had a needle poke incident and we had to make sure he was all clear before resuming trying. During that break I did bloodwork to make sure I was ok. And I also stopped breastfeeding my first so I wanted to see if my hormones were off because of that. Everything seemed normal except my thyroid tsh was higher than ideal for conceiving and keeping a pregnancy so I started medication several months ago and my numbers are great now. I was hoping that was the issue and we would have gotten pregnant right away. With our first it was the first try (I know not the normal and definitely should not have expected it to happen again) so 8 months feels so long. My husband needs to get his blood done also. This is only cycle two of trying after our 4 month break so I know I need to give it more time, I just thought with my thyroid managed and I stopped breastfeeding 5 months ago it would have happened either last cycle or this one.
Idk what I’m even looking for from this post, I just feel so defeated and I want my son to have a sibling.

A weekly dedicated space for members who have been trying for another for 12 or more months, experiencing infertility. Talk of treatment, testing/diagnosis, or tough feelings are welcome here. While this is a safe space to vent, please consider how other long haulers in different circumstances may feel about your words.

This thread is primarily for current long-haulers to connect with, vent to, and support each other. We ask that anyone else (including TFA grads and those whose current round of TTC has been less than 12 months) participate only to answer questions where your personal experience is relevant - for example, if someone asks about the side effects of a fertility treatment you have tried. For more general support, sympathy, and finger-crossing, in this thread, if you have not currently been trying for at least 12 months, please stick to a quiet upvote.

This thread is not meant to limit discussion only to this thread. Discussion of long haul issues is always welcome in the Daily Chat.