I see the same question over and over : “How can I pass? How can I pass? How can I pass?” And the answer is probably almost always the same: “Cut your hair. Cut your hair. Cut your hair.”
But you will want to ask yourself “Is this really about passing or is it about self-confidence?” Those two things maybe not be achieved in the same way - don’t think that passing seamlessly is automatically going to lead to self-confidence. If having luxurious hair, dressing in your own unique style, and having curves are the things that give you self confidence, then “passing” in a conventional sense may not be for you. And that’s ok.
I’m tall, I have big hands and feet, can grow a beard, and I still get misgendered sometimes- it just happens. And I’ve been myself for long enough that it doesn’t matter anymore, being misgendered doesn’t shake who I am and I can fly under the radar safety-wise.
Ultimately you do you, you find your own comfort level and expression. But here’s what is sure fire to help me pass:
-cut your hair. Really short. Probably a fade, or go into the barber and say “#2 back and sides and trimmed on the top”.
-wear straight (unfortunately boring) clothes.
-trim down, bulk up. Take good care of your body, and it’ll be good for your confidence as well. I don’t go to the gym, I’m shy so I workout at home and am into calisthenics.

Those three things would help you to pass in situations where you need to, more than anything else. Studying body language and speech patterns will help too, but that takes time and might always feel a bit unnatural.

I’d also recommend trying to spend time with people you care about in situations where you Dont have to pass, so you can still fill your need of self-expression in times when passing for work or safety is weighing on you.

Good luck out there

Before darkening my mustache I have been getting misgendered a lot so I have been testing last week what to use to darken my mustache and how to make it look the most natural and this is the best I've gotten so far and part of me says it looks good part of me says it doesn't so that's why I'm here to ask you all. I'm 22 I was on testosterone from November of 2023 up until January of 2026 I lost access due to being homeless and PO boxes are expensive so I can't DIY right now I would if I could, my money is mainly going towards survival and trying to find housing. For context I am binding packing and trying to darken what facial hair I do have so if you have any other advice on passing let me know and let me know if this is worth my time if I look passable or if I just look weird.

What the title says. Are people just being nice calling me sir, using he/him, assuming I'm a guy? I haven't been misgendered since I've started T (almost 2 years ago) but sometimes i genuinely think people clock me.

I don’t really want to out myself to people, but I just found this hoodie again and I remembered how much I like wearing it. If you do recognize it, how old are you? I’m mainly worried about uni.

Edit: maybe I was just chronically online as a teenager haha

I havent been assumed to be a woman since I was like 13 (im 18 now), but the other day some asshole came up to me and was like teasing/flirting at me and my friend, who is a girl. He explicitly called me girl. Im not even particularly attractive as a girl or guy?

Idk, ive been kinda insecure recently, got a top surgery consultation next week so that's nice.

Anyways. And tips ro pass better i guess would be good, thanks

Edit: he's not an asshole for flirting or calling me a girl, hes an asshole cause after talking me he insulted my friend and acted like a dick

lotta people complaining about their t results so i may as well. check these steps if you cant be fucked posting about it but are worried

CHECK YOUR TROUGH LEVELS

your levels should be around what your parents or siblings are. failing that, they should be at trough 600-1000 ng/dl in your first five years and 600-900 after that. if you are above, get aromatase inhibitor and/or check your dose. if youre going through an endo go by their advice in the first instance but endos love underdosing people. if youre on [RULE 10] get blood tests once every 14 weeks in the first 6 months and once every 6 months/year afterwards.

TIMING (WAIT, DICKHEAD)

you are going through male puberty. set your expectations accordingly. ask your parents and siblings if you have them. otherwise or if you cbf follow this timeline

weeks 1-6

libido increase, energy and mood changes, skin and oil production (acne)

months 2-6

periods stop, bottom growth, fat redistribution, voice changes and body hair begins. body hair and facial hair is heavily genetics based.

6 months to 5 years

voice deepening, muscle mass and strength, skeletal movements if youre a youngshit/your growth plates havent changed, facial changes, muscle mass, facial hair and body hair density

if you arent at 1+ years and you talk about how hrt is doing nothing for you and youre perfectly average in this timeline im going to find you man im fucking serious

INJECTIONS

gel works for a lot of people, but if youre struggling to get changes and youre on gel then you should probably switch to injections. you'll have more bioavailable testosterone. if youre thinking about this check your trough first, theres no point switching over if youre just being underdosed. if you are being underdosed, its easier to get the dose you need using injections

ESTROGEN SUPPRESSANTS

failing all of this, some people are just fucked genetically. if you have pmos this is more important for you. when you get blood tests, make sure they test your estrogen levels. if youre at 6 months and you still have cis female levels of estrogen, get on your fucking aromatase inhibitors. half of the issues i see are probably because of this. you wont need them permanently, most likely only a year or two for your body to get the message

WORK OUT

if you dont put in the effort you wont look like how you want to. go lift. if you have any disorders, trust your doctor, but physical activity is your best friend. muscle mass is the key to the most masculinisation you'll ever get. working out also boosts natural t levels. same with jacking off but you probably dont want to spend your time gooning lmfao

DUBIOUSLY LEGAL CHEMICALS

okay, so youve done all of the above and you still hate yourself. first do therapy, youre probably bdd. otherwise, take the rest of this with a veeery large grain of salt. the body of research on these chemicals is very low. dont give yourself poisoning you fucking moron. no im not going to tell you how to get the grey market ones

DHEA and ASHWAGANDA

these are compounds that convert into testosterone in the body. ashwaganda can lower stress and cortisol levels too. this is the safest option.

VITAMINS

generally do fuck all but its common advice so ill put it here. youll probably feel better if you arent low in iron or vitamin d or whatever the fuck

CREATINE

not a steroid or hormone. increases cellular energy production to rapidly accelerate strength, power output and muscle volume. if youre using creatine, work out otherwise it isnt going to do anything

SRAMS

veeery grey market. these are selective androgen receptor modulators. essentially, they bind to testosterone receptors. teechnically not steroids. might lower your natural t levels. DEFINITELY fuck with your liver.

ANDROSTENEDIONE

natural androgen. boosts natural t levels. wont fuck with you, but might be more or less helpful depending. good for people with pmos.

PEPTIDES

glp-1 receptor agonists and human growth hormone producers. yes, taking this might make you taller. Emphasis On Might. yes, taking black market peptides might fuck up your heart and metabolism. don't be stupid. go for approved ghs, osteoperosis and strength training peptides from legal sources. im not responsible for what happens if you buy black market steroids and die of a heart attack

BETA 2 AGONISTS

cuts body fat. good for fat redistribution in the mid stages of t. generally i tend to advise you eat more but this can help if youve got massive hips with pockets of fat on them

OZEMPIC and OTHER RELATED DRUGS

same as above. when you get off them, youll go back to your starting weight, but that's good for fat redistribution. probably the best idea out of any of these. short term use only, don't waste away you idiots

HYUCK, IM STILL UNHAPPY

get surgeries. you should learn to love yourself, but gender dysphoria is a medical issue that can be solved medically. check to see if you have brain worms like you did before you used peptides and shit. if people say you have brain worms and theyre people you can trust to be harsh, chill the fuck out. if you dont want to use peps then go straight for these. these surgeries have an extremely high success rate and people are almost universally happy with the results. im not covering top surgery and bottom in here because you know if you want and need those.

BODY CONTOURING

liposuction and abdominoplasty. gets rid of your hips and pouch and feminine shit caused by fat. objectively this is just what happens with fat redistribution, but if youre still unhappy after 5 years go for it.

FMS

facial masculinisation surgery. for all t can do, it cant reshape bone... much, especially if youre older and started t after 25. itll give you the face you would have had if you went through testosterone fueled puberty first. dont get buccal fat removal tho that shit looks ugly as hell

PEC IMPLANTS

sometimes top doesnt give you a masc figure. this can help. objectively, you should just work out, but if youre lazy then here it is. if you get this, do NOT then get really into working out, you will look stupid and itll look like tits

STILL UNHAPPY

go to therapy you have brain worms

After about 1.5 years on T (off and on) I have a beard yay! My biggest tip is make sure to use beard oil or conditioner I didn’t at first and my little beard looked so untamed. I love how it’s coming in! I can’t wait for my sides to fill in:)

My hips (and ass, lol. But it’s shrinking) are the absolute bane of my existence. I don’t feel like the photos do it justice but my hip to waist ratio is absolutely horrible. I’m already working out my upper body but I’m not sure what else to do. I know I’m losing fat and gaining muscle but I don’t know what else to do.

Edit: will add, I’m 5 months on t. I know I gotta wait and give it time but they’re just driving me crazy lol.

I don‘t think I look masc (my nose is relatively flat, my forehead is also very flat, and my facial features are flat). I’m not very confident in myself, so I grow my hair very long and cover my face to let myself pass. Because in this way i can look like a cis man indulge in anime

I have used hormones but there is no body hair and beard, only black soft fluff. My father is the same. It should be inherited. And because my parents‘ consent is required for hrt in my area, my family is prohibited, so I didn’t start hrt until I moved out of home at the age of 22.

Do you think it‘s better to cut a short hairstyle or keep it as it is now? Or short hair + face-covering style?

My height is about 172cm (5’7”-5‘8”？)

Like at this point it has to because she was old, right??? Most people think I'm a cis man so why did my student's bus monitor she/her me multiple times?

Like yeah I just dyed my hair purple but like... I see this woman at least 4x a week. I've seen her on times where I haven't shaved in 5 days.

Is there anything (other than ditching the purple) that would make me pass more??

I‘ve been on T a little over 3 months and tbh idk if its worth it. It’s helped with my dysphoria quite a bit but I don’t see a point if I’ll never pass fully. My face could MAYBE pass from the front, but my short midface gives it away if you’re actually looking and the moment you look at me from any angle except head on I’m just horrifically female. My side angle is HORRIBLE and I think it’ll prevent me from ever fully passing without fms, which I’ll probably never be able to get. My body is pretty bad too, I barely scrape 5’2 and my hips and thighs are massive (pic 4 doesn’t do it proper injustice). I’ve been working out consistently for almost a year and I genuinely love it but I hate going to the gym and being surrounded by actual men who are twice as strong as I’ll ever be with half the effort, and I don’t feel like it’s improved my physique that much anyway 😕😕 idk ik I’m kinda dysphoriaposting but everyone hugboxes me and I js need to know if there’s any potential or if I should just rep, I don’t think I can pass as cis without leg lengthening lipo and fms which I’ll never afford 😞😞

Ik I could stand to lose a few and Ik the glasses in pic 3 are women’s and look goofy lol they were a gift and I only use them to drive

Edit: ALSO which bathroom would y'all say I'm allowed to use? I don't feel like I'm supposed to be in either 🫠

you are a trans man. not a transman. trans is a modifier on the word man, and you are a man first and trans second. when you accept that you are in fact just a man and that you arent some third secret gender or whatever the fuck i promise you that you will find it easier to be confident with your body language

I have been trying to lose weight all my life I don’t want advice on that- What jeans can I get that will make THIS look better- I see everywhere reccomeds straight leg jeans but this is how they look on me- what else can i get?

So, I've been wanting a flannel shirt ever since I learned what real flannel is (compared to plaid button ups), but now that I have it all I can think about is how I could come across as a lesbian especially with my short hair, so now I'm kind of worried if it's hurting my passing now that I have the flannel. My voice and mannerisms seem to pass excellent but before people hear me talk I like to give a good impression (because I don't like talking).

Holy same pose syndrome ik im sorry 😓 but besides that, just looking for some tips, im open to anything besides removing my septum and gauges (you can mention if you think its stopping me from passing, and I'll keep it in mind but that'll just have to be smth i deal with). You guys can be brutally honest bc ik i should be hitting the gym more but trust im tryna do that 👀 I will mention things i feel like help and hurt me with passing if that helps, could be totally pointless but to start, some things that help me would be that Im 5'10 and would consider myself a binary trans man and dress masculinely, plus everyone around me is very supportive so they call me Cole and he/him and everything. But... things that arent so great is my voice is kinda high and clearly my face is round/I have a baby face. So idk sorry for yapping but hopefully i get some tips, that would be helpful 🥹

I’m a 16 year old trans guy with a 35/48 chest
Actually help me pls
I do have a binder (I just got a new one today) but according to a bra size calculator site it only brought be down to 35/40 BUT it really flattens out the under boob space which helps it look like a dense chest rather than boobs yk

Hello there!

1. So i feel self concious. I feel like people arent able to tell that i identify as a male sometimes even though im growing facial hair. Any tips for that? Makes me so uncomfortable to even go out.
2. Also—- i was wondering if there was any hair growth oil that is safe for cats. My eyebrows are really weird and one side is lighter than the other so i was hoping maybe more hair growth there can correct it,

Please be nice im so self conscious. I cant find love and i think how i look is the reason 💔

Worried in particular with respect to scarring and narrow waist/large hips. Would appreciate feedback on how to further masculinise to make sure I can stay safe.

Hi guys, I'm about to cut my hair again and I was looking for some tips to masculises it. This is fresh after a shower, it gets straighter when greasy, at least at this length. Part of me wants to keep it long, part of me wants to shave it off. Kinda looking for a middle ground that doesn't give lesbian or little boy if that's possible pre-t. At this stage in transition, I'll take looking good over "definitely a man" vibes if it's between that. My mum and I will be cutting it at home, we both have some experience with good results but we are not professionals.

Don’t worry I'm getting new glasses for Christmas.

I dont worry about 'regretting it', I'm in my 40s and have been thinking about it as a way to make me seem more masculine. Really just wondering about thoughts on if this was a viable thing to do for gender affirming. Also any type of tattoo suggestions. Im still on the fence. I'm 40, white, overweight and 5'4'', been on T for 6 months.

Hi all,

As discussed in this post, I think one thing that is commonly overlooked is how specific passing advice can be to region and culture. People of course bring this up a lot in general as in "copy the cis men you see," but I thought it might be useful for people to share more specifically what they've noticed in particular areas, cultures, etc.

I'll start. Copying somewhat from what I said in that thread, but I live in the Midwest and here more so than in a lot of other areas, if you give off any kind of impression that you have ever thought about your personal appearance in any way, that WILL stand out and get you noticed. Great if you pass, not so much otherwise. Men here tend to be aggressively generic in one way or another, usually athleisure or work clothes or some combination thereof, take your pick, or generic button down/khakis/Standard Corporate Outfit if they are older white-collar professionals. (I am less confident about this part, but in my experience academics and rural people are more likely to wear stronger plaid patterns, academics more often tucked in as a base layer, rural types more often as an outside layer, but generally especially for rural types these are going to be older and not recognizable brands such as LL Bean or otherwise fancy items. Even then, men are much more likely to stick to more conservative patterns, reds, earth tones, light blue, etc.) Athleisure is more associated with the middle and upper classes, work clothes and such with the working and lower classes or well-off conservatives or rural types (who will typically have cleaner/newer versions).

There are a decent number of younger men who are into fashion in more urban or college educated areas, but they're still a distinct minority, and their tastes tend to be somewhat more conservative than you might see elsewhere. They are generally liberal and dress like liberals, what I mean more specifically by conservative is that you do see more styles typically associated with older people among this crowd, particularly sweaters, outdoorsy business casual, and so on, and very few people explicitly dressing in a goth or alternative way. Alternative men here are more likely to be dressed for the farmer's market than a night out, even if they are going out. Men wearing earrings is a thing, but it's a very distinctive choice, and often paired with thinner or toned builds, long hair, facial hair, and assorted uses of collared shirts. Needless to say, these styles are hard to pull off unless you already pass.

In my experience, looking a little scruffy (like shaving every few days or letting your hair get a little shaggy and then cutting it super short, not like homeless) can sometimes be helpful insofar as it sorts you into the bucket of people who maybe just threw something on, and even if that clearly isn't you it is a male stereotype.

I personally dress more towards the Midwest alternative thing I described even though I don't necessarily have the right look or build for it, but I'm also just under 7 years on T and have had a lot of time to figure out what works for me. Flannels, layering, etc. work really well for me as they do for a lot of trans men, and earlier in transition it was helpful to style these things in a way that came off as somewhat more conservative. I can post a picture of what I mean if anyone is interested, although I will probably delete it pretty quickly.

Please share your observations of other regions in the comments, and if anyone else here thinks I'm off base or has had a different experience, please share that as well.

Currently binding with K Tape, and I’m looking for a good binder to wear over the tape. I am around a B or C cup, and just want some recommendations from individuals who have experience with various brands. Currently looking at spectrum outfitters, underworks, or origami.