help!!

[u/Disastrous_Case_1660]

At what point do we stop labeling behaviors as normal toddler behaviors and label them as concerning? I have had suspicions about my daughter for a while now and everyone has dismissed me saying it was normal behaviorally etc. Now that my April 2024 baby is 2.5 I feel like it’s gotten worse. She struggles with her emotional regulation and severe aggression along with severe tantrums, repetitive behaviors, struggling with transitions, sensory sensitivity, and occasional restrictive eating. However, she is also extremely smart, has great speech, very social, and wayy advanced for her age. She goes to an in home daycare with kids 2-3 years older than her, so she’s always thought she was older than she really is. I work in special education so I’m familiar with most diagnoses & disorders — but in elementary aged children. Even though shes still so young and everyone is brushing it off, I feel stumped that I can’t even pinpoint what exactly is happening with my own child and I just want to help her! I’m not sure if its a behavior thing, autism, etc but I know its something. I scheduled an appointment in January (it was the earliest available) for an eval for her, but until then I need help!!! Has anyone gone through something similar? What was the outcome? Any helpful tips and advice?

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[u/tigerlilybree]

My son just turned three and behaves the exact same way! I’d love to hear too what others have experienced and if this is normal. My son bounces on his knees when frustrated, and then will hit his head in his car seat over and over. If the tv is on or if he is playing with toys he likes, he will sit still.

[u/Disastrous_Case_1660 → u/tigerlilybree]

omg my daughter does the knee bounce too!! 😳 same with the self injury/aggression. I definitely think this all means something, as their behavior is a way of communication, but figuring out what exactly it is they need is the hard part. fingers crossed you get your answers soon!

[u/Zuccherina]

Hi there!

It is so hard because the behaviors can be developmentally appropriate to a point, but when does it cross the line into disorder territory? It’s good you have an assessment scheduled to get to the bottom of it!

I really like listening to the podcast Autism Dadcast. They spend the first couple episodes on what their kids were like in the beginning and what their thought process was until diagnosis, whether they doubted it or were in denial. You might find it helpful! I can say that everything they discuss feeling and thinking were the exact same process I went through with my autistic daughter, so that’s really something!

[u/yamikit666]

My child was diagnosed at 2yr with autism, OCD,and speech delay, we were advised she also shows signs of ADHD/add but can't be formally tested for those until she's 5yrs. It took A LOT of advocating for her and arguing with her doctor to get her referral for testing so early(we started when she was lil over one and having obvious speech and OCD issues). Both me and her father are on the spectrum with multiple disorders that are documented as well as documented family history on both sides which helped some but it was a battle. That said the earlier you can get a diagnosis and get her into early intervention therapies the better! Document everything! If you notice she's doing things like repetitive play, lining toys up straight and getting overly distressed if you mess up the order, struggling with task transitions, ect try to catch video for doctors to look at. The one that convinced my lil ones doc was a mean trick on my part but it got the message across. My Kiddo sorts her toys religiously, so I set up camera and proceeded to mix her big block Legos with her wooden blocks on her floor, boom massive meltdown and she immediately frantically started sorting them back out into their normal bins repeating "NO! THATS NOT RIGHT! NO!" it was heartbreaking and I will never do that to her again but it got point across to her doctor that her behavior was extreme and needed addressed. Now she's in occupational and speech therapy.