I am a cis male queer dude, and I've been growing my hair out. I was just heading into the hospital to grab some 24 hour Starbucks, and a security guard called out to me loudly and called me ma'am as he saw me from behind.

The reason this is post-worthy to me is that in my mid-twenties I went through a period of questioning my gender. It just made me smile. That's all.

Both of them are gay

Sono Lorenzo, studio Gender Studies e per la mia tesi cerco persone trans e non binarie, maggiorenni, che vivono in provincia o in un piccolo centro, per un'intervista di 10 domande, di persona o online. Il tuo nome e i dettagli che possono farti riconoscere non compariranno mai nella tesi: mi interessa il tuo vissuto. Scrivimi in DM, e se conosci qualcuno condividi pure🩷

I find it fascinating how often people claim that Black trans women are the blueprint of the entire queer community, or that they are the reason we enjoy the freedoms we have today. While their contributions to the American LGBTQ+ movement deserve recognition, this narrative often reflects an very very US-centric understanding of queer history.

Stonewall was the beginning of queer liberation in the USA (maybe before already). In other countries like Germany or the Netherlands, for example, the COC was founded in 1946, more than two decades before Stonewall. There were gay protests before stonewall. Other countries have their own histories, activists, and struggles that developed within entirely different political and cultural contexts.

The issue is not recognising Black trans women’s contributions, but projecting one country’s historical experience onto an entire global community. The assumption that queer liberation everywhere follows the same American trajectory erases the independent histories of LGBTQ+ movements elsewhere.
The global queer community is not an extension of the American queer community. The United States is not the centre of the world, and treating its history as the universal blueprint for queer liberation is itself an incredibly US-centric perspective

I know that many people ask this question especially in the times we live in.

I'm not from the US, I'm from Germany and while arguably you can still live here in the country as a queer and gender queer person, I've been very fed up with the lack of social support lately from the state lately for their citizens.

In terms of mental health support, health insurance and the health system in general (which is currently basically being dismantled step by step by our state) and alongside the rising transphobia around the globe, I'm wondering if there are any good countries left to move to eventually.

While we have generally good laws (not all of them unfortunately but enough) in place, they don't always work practically and the country has been slowly going downhill as a whole.

I've heard the Nordic countries are pretty good and progressive but that some right-wing shifts are happening over there too, as well as the same thing with Canada. I heard Spain might be good.

I'd just like to live in a country where the overall perception of queer and specifically trans people isn't as negative AND the state cares about their citizens as a whole. The lack of practical medical and psychological support, as well as the lack of moderately well paying jobs and the bad housing crisis over here is just driving me insane slowly.

I've just been needing professional mental support lately a lot and the situation with getting help is bad enough (very long wait lines, bureaucracy is a nightmare, public health insurance isn't awesome) and now it's about to get worse due to the state passing bills to cut funding for psychotherapy to some extent basically.

I just want to move out one day to some place safer and somehow feel more supported as someone who does want to work but faces struggles.

Hi!

I'm starting an LGBTQ+ magazine at my school, and I am looking for queer teens and adults willing to share their experiences to help others better understand our community and help me make a difference at my school. The description of your queer experience can be around 250-1000 words, and it is always anonymous.

Your experiences matter, whether they are inspirational or ordinary, frustrating or painful; it is time to let others see a more real side of us, so they can truly and effectively stand in our perspective and understand empathetically. It also builds a stronger connection among us, supporting the youthful LGBTQ+ community.

Please let me know by commenting below if you are eager to share

Here is the link to the Google Form; please fill it out if you are interested: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSduKIuAsSDtFz8BQjESsnbjU_BvStqameN0G7Vepw0qFRNDJw/viewform?usp=header

Ayúdenme con eso, estoy confundida, porque me identifico como aroace pero también como lesbiana y no sé cómo sentirme al respecto

This been on my mind for far too long, ive been thinking about this everyday for years. It's been getting harder to avoid.

I'm a closeted non-binary

And it hurts deeply that i want to be recognized, that i would like to be treated and refered like such. And i hate that i am, i truly do. I'm a south american living in a pseudo fascist country, which it's lenguage itself doesnt even have gender neutral terms. People here barely understand the concept of ftm or mtf transgender people. I just know, i know the moment i reveal what i am, i'm gonna be ridiculed, i'll be a living joke. How could i ever be taken seriously if i ask people to call me a term that doesnt even exist in spanish?... I tried to convince myself, i tried so many times but even if i try to drown those thoughts i still try to appear myself more androgynous and then the dread hits me. The realization that it's impossible

It feels like theres no escape. I truly feel hopeless. This morning i saw myself in the mirror and i felt horrified, disgusted. I'll never be the person i want to be, i'll die as a man

​Yesterday I was hanging out with my best friend, and at one point she asked me when I had my first kiss. After I told her, she started telling me she had never had one and was scared she might be terrible at it during her first relationship. When I told her the right person wouldn't judge her, she suddenly asked if we could kiss/make out sometime so I could teach her.

​I started making excuses, telling her I've always hated kissing my friends, especially girls (the idea of me kissing a girl on the lips makes me throw up), and that it feels super uncomfortable for me. She knows very well that I'm only into guys, but she still kept asking me a few more times to do it just so she could learn.

​I was uncomfortable as hell. She's bisexual, and I really didn't want her to develop a crush on me, nor did I want to hurt her feelings because I love her as a friend. Am i not understanding her? Or is this like something girls do when they like another girl?

what's a unique but self explanatory way of coming out as trans and bisexual to my mum? she's going away on a weekend trip in mid december and i'd like to come out before then but every time i think about saying anything i just pussy out, she's supportive of queer people and she's fairly woke

I (she/her, very baby queer) have been talking to this person (he/they), who my friends describe as soft lesbian. He has a big, adhd personality. They’ll send me videos and sometimes do this thing where they’ll get close to the camera and “lick” the “camera” down and up. It’s obviously at me, but it’s more like a cartoonish “lick” movement than like overtly sexual. He has claimed he’s not a furry or anything like that (no shade). Is this from something or is he just being a lil weirdo?

Hi, I'm new here and actually not done exploring my sexuality and gender. In my country it's difficult to come by a queer community and even my friends (a lot of them are queer) are still don't understand how some people are uncomfortable with their sex. So I have no support line and no one to talk to. And I really don't understand who am I, but I think I'm genderfluid? What I'm asking is if it's okay to have a celebrity crush or just crush and be happy for a few days and enjoying it and then all of a sudden cry and hate yourself a little because you're not that tall, confident person they are? And I don't mean it in the literal sense I'm not them, just that it seems I'll never feel myself so comfortable being me.

Hey everyone! I wanted to share a piece from a visual project I’ve been building around identity, survival, and performance.

I perform as Kara Zmatiq, a live-singing drag artist based in Sydney, Australia. Unlike the traditional lip-sync circuit, my entire decade-long journey in drag has been built on singing 100% live with my own raw vocals on stage.

This portrait explores the relationship between Braeden (navigating street survival, coercive relationships, and church suppression in black leather) and Kara (reclaiming sovereign power in geometric mirrored shard armor).

In our scene, drag is so often framed as putting on a disguise to escape reality. For me, taking off every filter and singing live in drag has been the ultimate armor. It’s the visual and sonic representation that nobody can take away the voice you built with your own lungs, and nobody can revoke the crown you earned through your own survival.

Would love to hear thoughts from other performers and creatives on how you balance your off-stage self with your stage persona!

Im 19 F and my gf is 20 F we’ve been dating for almost 2 months great relationship started as friends then we were sleeping with each other on drunk nights got serious over summer started dating this august everything has been great she’s a great person with dreams and goals good financial management great communication skills like I think her one con is she likes to nap like I have reason to breakup with her but I want to I feel like I’m in college and I know this might be dumb but I want to experience more this is my first serious relationship and I thought this is what I wanted but I feel like I haven’t experienced enough I don’t have crazy stores to tell my kids and I’m a spontaneous person basically I’m on here trying to figure why I want to break up with her like I don’t think “sleeping around with more people” is experiencing life but going on dates meeting new people or having a love triangle like these are thing I want to experience and I wouldn’t cheat on her she’s too nice but also I don’t want to let her go like now that I’m typing this it just sounds awful not I don’t want her to be happy but I feel like we could come back together in the future but then again when I have busy days I look forward to hanging out with her and talking to her and sometimes when I go out with friends I wish to not turn down the guys and girls that try to talk to me. Idk what I want really and I know communication is key I’ve implied us being more open not saying fucking people but when we party get a instagram or 2. Will I regret breaking up with her? Will I regret not breaking up sooner? Am I just scared of long term commitment?

I was looking for customized LGBTQ cups but they are damn expensive. So, I’m looking into importing single wall double wall paper cups with customized LGBTQ designs (rainbow + specific flags) and selling them at no profit, no loss, basically covering only the actual cost of manufacturing, shipping, and fees.

The idea is to make them available for cafes, events, or individuals without the usual rainbow-washing markup.Before I put time and money into this, I’d like honest feedback:

Would “sold at cost” make you more likely to support or buy them?

Any designs or approaches that would make this feel more genuine vs. still performative?

Any concerns I should know about?

Not selling anything right now, just trying to understand if this approach is worth pursuing. Appreciate any real thoughts

I wanted to make a sub where people in the LGBTQIA+ community in Orange County can meet new friends, so I started r/lgbtqfriendsinoc! In our little corner of Reddit, we'll all discuss the best places to meet new friends, introduce ourselves so we can potentially DM each other, and share anything else helpful or reaffirming that crosses the mind. Feel free to join if that sounds fun to you! (Thanks to the r/queer mods for the okay!)

I'm 17 F, bi, and I have a friend who's made it really clear that he has a big crush on me. I've already turned him down 3 times, and he's told me that he's fine with it and he's not expecting us to be partners and that he's ok with us just being best friends. I've told him it doesn't bother me at all that he has a crush on​ me and that I don't feel pressured at all. (I've only really felt a little pressured just now because he recently sent me a song called "Sa'yo" by silent sanctuary and said it was for me...)

He's a really sweet boy and it's really fun to hang out with him, but I'm a little scared now because I think I seem to have developed a small crush on him? So naturally it would make sense for me to enter a relationship if I felt that way, right?​​ I feel guilty for feeling like i don't want to date him anyways despite feeling this way.

I'm a masc presenting girl, I've got short hair, and he has said he thought I was a guy at first hahaha... I suppose I'm a little scared of losing myself I guess... And I feel like I don't see myself spending my whole life with a boy? I think it's bad that I feel this way...

But I feel like I'd regret not agreeing to be with him??? But I also feel like I'd regret​ agreeing to do that... I don't want to hurt him at all by making the wrong decision but it also kinda feels like I owe it to him :'0 ( also​ I've never been in a relationship before anyways so I think I'd be pretty bad at it and leave a lasting scar Xp )

I'm a terrible person because I just know that if he was a girl I'd be head over heels by now ;___;

Damn, life would be so much easier if I was straight af highkey 😭 (bading na bading masyado 💀💀💀)

Just a small venting moment here but I’d also be curious if people have also struggled to find a good fit in therapy, especially if you have multiple queer identities. I’ll probably be looking for another therapist.

Basically my experience of sexuality has always been asexual even when I didn’t know that this term existed. It also made figuring out I was romantically interested in women complicated because it didn’t feel like the mainstream way lesbian relationships were represented because I felt little to no interest in having sex with anyone. In addition to this, while I was still trying to date within heterosexual norms due to being confused about my sexuality, in my mid twenties I was SAed by an ex boyfriend.

My therapist, who I have been seeing for almost a year, validated the fact that I identified as a lesbian initially. She was a bit more confused about asexuality but we didn’t really discuss it too much. However, when she learned about my history with assault by a man last week it was as if something clicked for her and she said “well no wonder you feel weird about dating or sex with men because you’ve had such a bad experience with a man”. And the rest of the session was subtly hinting at the fact that she thought I was probably a suppressed straight woman who just had to properly unlock her sexual desire towards men and that my romantic feelings towards women were just misplaced feelings in order to feel safe. It was honestly super frustrating that the fact that I am not really interested in sex (and have never been well before the assault) and also was SAed have now been conflated and also put in question the fact that I am romantically interested in women.

I just have so many questions and need so much guidance. I dont even know if I'm labelling it right.

Hello and good evening dear comunity. I am new to this group so I would like to start by telling you al about myself. My name is Vilborg, I am 37 years old, female, prounouns she/her. Im Icelandic and have lived here al mylife and I am a kindergarden teacher/pre school teacher. I am also pan sexual, my wife in al but on paper is a beautiful transgender lesbiam woman and we have been to gether for almost 13 years.

We are, as we speak, watching a movie called Outing Riley, about thid x years old man in Chicago (movie from 2004) and he is a gay man. But he also an Irish american catholic and can’t/ won’t come out to his family and loved one from fear.

I would like to hear your guyses coming out stories, how ever hard or easy, messy or beautiful they al are. As for me, I knew from age 12 that I wasn’t straight, but wasn’t until I was 20 something I figured out I was pansexual, not bi. I came out to my mom and sister at 18 years old when I started dating my first girlfriend. And my mom, my dad, my sister, my grandparents, al were so amazing and nice about it. My mom was just happy to know I wasn’t pregnant at 18 years old.

So if you want, tell me your coming out story.

Hello !

It's my first time that I'm making a post and writting something this long in english, so I'm sorry if my post overshare too much or if it's confusing / wonky 😓

I'm 20yo and I think I need to know if people have a similar experience

And I suppose that queer space might be the right place to ask / share my experience because its one of the most diverse community that I know sooo....

And if it's not right place to ask I'm so sorry !

I already know that I have a shitty self-estime

I find so many things beautifull but when it's about me, I find it horrible

And, for 3-4 past years, and I noticed that to be able to appreciate some part of myself I had to associate me with an animal or plants

To be precise, I don't think I identify myself as animal or some other stuff, it's just like I like an animal for their appearance, their way to survive in the wildness etc. And I notice that some parts kinda looks like me ( more on the vibe side ) and suddenly I tolerate my "flaws"

For exemple, I like opossums for a few years, and I learned to love my fucked-up nose and accepted my anxity issues

Or another example, I have a easier time to taking care of myself when I imagine myself as some kind of mystery plant than an human

Also, I've been a little bit more motivated to express myself with cloth since I've come up the idea of evoking insects,

I don't mean I want to cosplay like a cockroach, I just want to dress up with layers and some combo of texture that can give of the idea of what "any kind" of insects looks like

So far it's the only experience that I have

Maybe this is just a coping mecanisime / a silly me thing and not something queer, IDK TwT

And, yea, I'm already happy that some of you had read that far and If you could I'll be glad to have some responses

Thank you and have a nice day yall !

I’d like to get a tattoo on my neck of my queerness but I don’t want it to be OBVIOUS. I’m abro and I switch from bi to lesbian (trust me I hate it. I wish I could just be bi or a lesbian and I know there’s a lot of hate about this and I’m sorry and I don’t want to cause problems but only one label feels right sometimes and the other other times and idk). So I want it clear I’m into women but that only people in the queer community would see it