I have a nearly 3 week old and had to have an emergency c section. I was up and about after 3 days and have managed to get quite mobile in the short time. But the last few days have felt tough. Baby doesn’t like to be put down for more than a few minutes and even when he’s asleep he still doesn’t. The first couple of weeks were fine, my partner even went to work every other day but now it’s starting to feel a bit like I’m doing nothing. I have no time to even make a drink or just quickly put moisturiser on. This might sound petty but the last couple of days I’ve felt a bit down about it. All I can do is hold the baby and doom scroll to keep him content.

Anyone else feel like there just doing nothing with a baby?

If you are planning on breastfeeding or even ebf, but you want to keep the option open for your baby to sometimes take a bottle in the future, give them bottles every once in a while now. Don’t give them one for the first couple of weeks, but after that, consider pumping and feeding with a bottle because they, like my daughter, may refuse to take one once their sucking reflex goes away.

To briefly give my story, I only ever planned on breastfeeding. By the time she was 4 months old, I knew she was small, but I swear to God I thought she was getting enough milk from me. Sometimes babies are just small. Anyway, after her 4 month check up and doing a weighted feed, it turned out she was getting hardly any milk from me at all. I tried to supplement with formula in a bottle, but it was too late - she refused it, literally screaming her head off. While discussing other options with an LC and her ped, and renting a $2,000 pump to build up my supply and a 10 day hospital stay, she still has never accepted a bottle and I had to supplement through something called a secondary nursing system. I had to feed her every 3 hours around the clock and pump in between, eventually transitioning to the 2 hour feeds during the day that I still do now. She went from the 4th percentile to the 46th, so she is thriving now lol.

All that is to say, even though I’ve adjusted after doing this for 3 months, my life would be so much easier if I could just take out a bottle and feed her. I could go out in public again without being anxious whether she’s getting enough milk.

I’m putting this here because out of the 5 lactation consultants I’ve seen since she was born, and at least 3 pediatricians before her hospital stay, not one told me that I should occasionally give her a bottle or she might reject it in the future.

Anyway, hope this helps someone who may not know lol, I wish someone had told me before she was 6 weeks old.

…at me at 3 am right when she wakes up bc then I know it’s a split night and she ain’t going down.

Usually she wakes up, she does 1-3 oz (doesn’t usually take a full feed) and then she’ll go back down fairly quickly (20-35 min). But sometimes she wakes up with a big ass smile (and it’s so freaking cute but it also means she’s guarantee not going down after feeding). I can’t nail down how and why it happens (nothing different during the day as far as I can tell).

What do you guys do when it happens?? Try to rock/put down? Embrace it and play with baby? Something else?? (9 weeks old - usually sleeps 2-4 hour first stretch in the crib, then 1-2 hours the rest of the night in the crib. For these wake ups, she stays up for about 2 hours and will eventually go down when I’m holding her…)

At least it’s cute while my sleep deprived body and I cry a silent tear.

Had my baby’s 6-8 week review today. He is 8 weeks old and EBF. Doctor asked how he was sleeping at night to which I responded that he wakes roughly 2-3x in the night for a feed. Gp advised I tried to stop feeding baby after midnight so he can sleep longer through the night. Does this sound stupid to you too? Also discussed his reflux symptoms and issues with wind as HV suggested getting gaviscon from the doctors. The GP suggested he might be overfed and to try not feeding him as much for the next 2-3 weeks. My son is between the 9th and 25th centile. Has anyone had similar advice or bad experience with the 6-8 week check?

Moms, when did you started leaving your babies with your husbands to run errands? How did that look like for you as far as feeding, naps, etc.

My 4-month-old daughter (born at 38 weeks) is my whole world, but today brought me to my knees. My wife is heading back to work, so I’m stepping up more, and right now, I just feel completely useless.

Our night was brutal, and the day kicked off at 5:00 AM. She wouldn't settle and refused her bottle completely, kinda arching her back/doing situps and screaming like I was torturing her. I spent an hour spiraling, thinking I couldn't even feed my own kid, only for her to crush 120 ml with zero drama 50 minutes later with mother in law helping.

Then came the sleep battle. My back is wrecked from wearing her in the Ergobaby for an hour just to get her down. When I finally attempted the crib transfer gently, the second she hit the mattress she screamed bloody murder.

The comparison trap is eating me alive, too. My mother in law can feed her milk-drunk in the crook of her arm and transfer her like a ninja. When I try, everything implodes. It makes me feel like I lack the patience, the touch, or whatever instinct everyone else seems to have.

Between playing human pacifier every 45–90 minutes and feeling like I can’t do anything right, I'm running on empty. We’re holding off on sleep training until mid-November for her adjusted age, but surviving right now feels impossible.

Does it actually get better? Just looking for some solidarity from dads who made it through this trench. Thank you

Would you travel abroad with a 4 month to visit family (not as a tourist)? The baby will have all vaccines up to the 4 month mark. The flight has a 4 hour layover in Atlanta (busy airport).The departure flight is on December 14th, and we are coming back at the end of January, so the baby would be 5 months old on the return trip.

I already have our flights. But I keep going back and forth. Baby 4 month vaccines will be given one week prior to traveling.

My newborn daughter sounds really congested, especially at night. She makes these heavy, noisy breathing sounds, which makes me nervous. During the day, it seems much better.
We keep the room temperature controlled and use a humidifier. We’ve also tried saline nasal spray and a nasal aspirator, but the congestion still seems to happen mostly at night.

For parents who’ve experienced this, did anything help? Is there anything else that worked for your little one?
Would appreciate hearing your experiences! ❤️

I’m about 4 weeks pp with my first baby! My husband and I have both now started coming down off the high of having a baby and are beginning to feel worn down by her and frustrated with parenthood. I think I struggled with this from the get-go but my husband luckily had a lot more gumption than I did (I’m sure because I’m the one who gave birth and such).

Please chime in everyone and tell us that this hellish phase ends! We’re thinking all of the usual thoughts: we made a mistake, we’re not good enough parents for her, we are frustrated with her and feel guilty about it, we want time away from her and also feel guilty about that.

We’ve been really good at supporting one another and making sure we both get our own personal time out of the house and to take a break from her. We call it playing hooky!

I know this phase can be infamously difficult and that it’s also one of the phases parents miss the most but I just cannot fathom missing this. Ugh!

Our baby for context is generally pretty average. We’re formula feeding, she takes her bottles fairly easily, average gas pains, average amount of fussy nights and cluster feeds, pretty good sleeper once we can get her to relax. Plus we each sleep 6 hours uninterrupted as we take turns covering the night.

With all of that to consider it’s STILL wearing us down so I can only imagine what it would be like for fussier babies with more issues than her or for breastfeeding moms (bless you all!).

TIA

Hi all,

I'm 4 month pp and I feel so lonely. Partner is back at work full time, other child is at school, everyone else is at work, and me and partner take different hours with baby so everyone can sleep some. I feel like I go to bed alone every single night, wake up alone every morning, spend the whole day just me and baby reading and playing and then repeat.

I love my LO more than life itself but I am so incredibly lonely. I spoke to my partner about it today and he just got mad and walked out.

Is this normal? Is it a hormonal thing? I don't remember this with my other child but I had PPA and I'm wondering if that eclipsed this feeling? Will it get better?

Any advice appreciated as I feel like I'm in a black hole on my own a bit atm.

Currently writing this at 4am and dying. My two week old (preemie was born at 37/6) is not sleeping unless shes being held, Ill fall asleep holding her but its not quality sleep as Im constantly on edge making sure shes okay, we also try the safe 7 co sleep but still I will have maybe an hour of light sleep. My husband helps throughout the night but he works so I try not to wake him for too much, and we are both overwhelmed with her not sleeping. It has been a huge adjustment from week 1 where we were waking her to feed etc. We try swaddling her, heating up her bassinet, gas drops, sound machine, bottle after bottle. Im at a loss for what to do/try. Maybe formula overnight? She will take like two ounces of breast milk and be “full” for 1-2hrs then want more but refuses to take more in the first bottle. Please help, sincerely a ftm

Edit: Wow, super disheartening and sad the way a lot of you have reacted to a new mom just asking an innocent question and wanting to make sure she’s doing the right thing, as if something egregious has been done. Certainly won’t be posting here for help again. Thanks to those who answered kindly and didn’t make me feel silly for asking about my baby’s oral hygiene.

FTM with a 1 day old, and have been getting help from the nurses.

Been trying to get baby to latch every time he starts to root around. He gets a couple good sucks in, then gives up. I have been pumping colostrum in between hand expressing into his mouth.

Aside from sandwiching my nipple for him, is there anything else i can try, or is it just trial and error until we both figure it out?

Midwife says he has no tongue or cheek ties. Thank you all in advance!

So unfortunately, I can't upload a picture that would make this a lot easier, but after he sleeps his swaddle is always wet from like mid back to his head, so it seems way too high to be pee?? Also his diaper seems completely dry? But his swaddle is soaking wet on the other hand like seems way too much to be sweat? It doesn't have a smell and the house is at 72-74° F
Baby 5 days old. thank you in advance !!
Edit: it's letting me upload a pic in the comments if you want to take a look at that! Thanks again so much Reddit friends

hi guys :)

ftm here, and we finally have our 2-week-old baby boy with us. 🤍

he is someone we’ve been praying and planning for for a year, and we’re honestly so grateful that he’s finally here with us.

pregnancy was okay, but there were definitely times when i had breakdowns because i’ve always been an anxious person. thankfully, i managed to get through it with the help of my husband.

NOW… i never thought having a newborn would be THIS hard. it really is. i find myself crying almost every day. every time it starts getting dark, i get so anxious thinking about whether he’ll stay awake and cry the whole night again.

i’m scared of the unknown. i’m scared he might get sick, even though he hasn’t. i’m scared about our finances, too. but most of all, i’m scared because i honestly don’t know what i’m doing sometimes. 🥺

will things get better?

please tell me it does. especially to those who also had a really hard time during the first few weeks. i just want to hear that it gets easier, that i’ll eventually figure things out, and that one day, i won’t feel this overwhelmed anymore.

thank you.

Hello everyone my baby is now 1 month and we switched him to Kendamil Goat and so far for a week he’s been so great on it compared to the other ones . We had his one month appointment and the pediatrician recommended we switch to regular because the lack of Folic Acid in the goat milk. Any other opinions on this ? (He’s gaining weight very healthy and growing at a superb rate)

So my LO threw up pretty much everything she ate during the evening time around 11pm waking up out of her sleep I pick her up and boom! Like huge amount bigger then anything she’s ever done. She is breastfed. We clean baby up she’s giggling etc like nothing happened. Throughout the night and early morning between 11 - 8 am she was fed 2/3 times around 10 while trying to nurse she takes herself off and hugely throws up again! Big amounts and multiple times in a row. But at the end of this one there was yellow bile. Baby also hasn’t had a wet diaper since 11pm it’s now 10am

Call ped they recommend going to the ER.. We get to ER and baby has pooped a huge one! Whoohoo! But we couldn’t tell if it was pee.

We explain what’s been going on and we do X-ray and ultrasound of abdomen. The nurse gives baby Motrin. I ask why she has no fever. She told me it was for teething. Every comes back fine they say. If she continues to throw up come back. They aim for 3 were diapers in 24 hours. LO has gone 14.. I left with no real explication or how to help my baby.

Am I just overthinking? I have a toddler as well and he’s perfectly fine. I’m call ped to tell them and see if they recommend something different.

Has anyone had a similar experience or throw up episodes out of no where? I think baby is dehydrated like why isn’t baby peeing?? Are they not concerned because baby has poop?

I think it’s time I accept my 14 week old EBF son’s natural bedtime is around 11 PM. I try daily to see if I can push it earlier but it always leads to naps and a lot of screaming. He sleeps 11 PMish to 10 AM with his usual 2-3 (if I’m lucky) wakeups.

Now the question is do I just accept it? Is there a way to successfully move it up? I’m pretty burnt out by 7/8 PM and would love for a break, especially with daylight savings coming up.

I was trying to soothe my baby and get him to sleep so I put my palm on his chest so he can feel my presence as he only wants to sleep on me. And I fell asleep doing it. We were laying together on the bed.
Is it heavy?? It happened also yesterday. I’ve been so tired. He woke up himself hungry. I’m so worried if I had pressed his chest and restricted his breathing. feel like puking.

my baby girl of 2 months has a sacral dimple we just had her ultra sound this Monday and it showed her ended at L3 instead of L1/L2. She is now to see a specialist this coming Monday, hubby and I are praying and very concerned, has anyone had a similar experience and can you share what happened with the specialist or how the MRI went? I’ve been so nauseous for days it’s hard to even eat and I’m scared I’m ruining my milk supply. If anyone can share their experience id greatly appreciate it.

Background info - baby girl kicks legs, pees, lifts head, has no hair tuft no pus but has sacral dimple.

Hi there!

We are flying with our 5 month old - a 9 hour international flight for the first time!

Just looking for advice on whether the bassinet seat is worth it as I can see it is literally right next to the toilet and galley so it will be quite noisy / distracting potentially for baby?

For reference our baby only contact naps during the day (first flight is a day time flight) but sleeps overnight in his cot (second flight is a red eye overnight flight)

We are flying on Vietnam Airlines if anyone has experience with this airline
- premium economy on the way there (seat 10D)
- business on the way back (seat 1K)

6 days pp and my milk came in a few days ago! Yay! Only issue is sitting here hand pumping when I need to be getting chores done is driving me up a goddang wall. The manual pump works pretty well for me but again, I need to get mobile.

Is this a worthwhile purchase? Should I spring for a pricier option? Or if you have a great, budget friendly wearable pump recommendation, let me know!

Thanks loves ❤️

Scared I hurt baby. He had his 2 month vaccines and he was really warm at night. I only did a forehead temp and wasn’t thinking that I need to do rectal. He woke up crying many times at night and I was able to nurse him back but he was clearly uncomfortable/had a fever and I didn’t give Tylenol/ignored a fever. Is there anyway I harmed him? He’s fine now with no temp but I feel like such a dumb mom

My 11-week-old seems to have suddenly started hating contact naps, and I’m not sure how to handle it.

She used to love napping in the wrap carrier or falling asleep in my arms after nursing on the couch or bed. Now, when I try to get her to sleep that way, she cries for 15+ minutes, pushing and wiggling against me like she’s trying to get away. Going for a walk or rocking her doesn’t seem to help anymore.

When soothing her doesn’t work, I’ll put her down in the bassinet, and sometimes she’ll fall asleep almost immediately. Over the last few days, I’ve also tried starting naps in the bassinet instead. She’ll usually fuss on and off for 5–10 minutes while I’m right next to her before falling asleep, but then she only sleeps for about 20 minutes. Nothing I try seems to rescue these short naps anymore, even picking her up and holding her or feeding her.

On the other hand, if I keep her in the wrap and work through 15–20 minutes of fussing and her shoving at me she’ll sometimes eventually fall asleep and nap for 1.5–2 hours.

I use Huckleberry’s SweetSpot recommendations, which generally line up really well with her sleepy cues. Her wake windows are usually around 1.5 hours and we do 4-5 naps depending on how the day goes.

I’m not trying to sleep train her at this age, and I’d really prefer that she not have to cry herself to sleep. I’m right there with her, trying to soothe her, whether she’s in my arms or in the bassinet. But lately it feels like my attempts to soothe her or encourage contact naps are actually making her more upset, and I’m confused about what to do.

So my questions are:
- Should I just lean into bassinet naps if that’s what she seems to prefer, even if they’re only 20 minutes long?
- Is it better to keep trying for longer contact naps, even when she initially seems so unhappy being held?
- Has anyone else’s baby suddenly started preferring independent sleep this young?

For additional context, she sleeps well at night and typically only wakes 1–2 times to nurse. She also refuses pacifiers despite my trying 7 different brands and styles, so unfortunately that’s not been an option for soothing her!