r/declutter • u/AutoModerator • 1d ago
Monday Meltdown - Share Your Decluttering Fails Here
Failure is part of life. Share your decluttering challenges and failures here. Examples include:
- Emotional clutter
- Not enough time
- Getting overwhelmed
- Routing (recycling, donating, trash...)
If you're just venting, or don't want advice, please let us know in your comment.
This is a low-stress place to share challenges and failures for those who might not want to create a new discussion.
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u/KiwiTheKitty 1d ago
I managed to get rid of a couple things via the FB buy nothing group, which is huge for me, but it did bring up my issue of being emotionally attached to inanimate objects :(
I know it's normal to some extent, but it just feels so much stronger for me than for other people. Like it runs in my family and my grandma was definitely a hoarder and my dad was a borderline hoarder like me, but even my siblings don't get as distressed about getting rid of things as I do. Like tell me why I'm close to tears about giving away an old monitor I bought 8 years ago, but haven't used for 2?? Even the birthday gift I'm months overdue on giving to a friend feels like it's become a fixture in my apartment...
I am in DBT which has helped a lot with my distress tolerance and I know it's a skill I can continue working at, but I just wanted to vent. I'm sure some people in this sub can relate.
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u/EntireInitiative713 1d ago
giving away that monitor is a real win, even if it hurt. the fact that you're in DBT and building the skill means you're doing the hard part already. be proud of that, the tears don't erase the progress.
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u/susaneec 1d ago
I did purge quite a bit of new, unused BBW items, hair care, and perfumes to a local women's shelter. But I also bought new shelves for my collection so I have room for my hoard. I am rotating through my scents for use and ones that I don't love, I'm setting aside. But I also have a list of new or new to me perfumes that I would like to try. Feels a bit like chess.
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u/dumdumhours 1d ago
literally had a monday meltdown today in front of my parents and brother.
very long story short i moved out and im going through the process of cleaning out my childhood bedroom. i have so much shit everywhere and i can’t get rid of it because:
-
donating requires action
i have adhd, so every time i see something that needs to be donated all i can think about is how i have to first take it to my place, then put it in my car, then drive my car to the donation place, then drive it back. there’s so many little actions that go into dealing with the single item and it exhausts me just thinking about it -
i feel guilty
every time i take any kind of action towards getting rid of something it’s
“what if i need this later”
“what if this doesn’t get disposed of properly”
“what if i can turn this into something”
i know that everything is going to end up in the landfill anyways. i know that it’s not my responsibility to deal with the environmental impact of throwing things away.
i’m still emotional so im sorry if this is all over the place, i just feel like im exploding and no one really knows how to help me.
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u/FredKayeCollector2 9h ago
Maybe you would be better off only taking what you want in your new place and just leave everything else for your parents to deal with? Kind of a dick move but if you're already had your meltdown, it wouldn't be 100% unexpected (witness to my husband's son stomp out of the house and leave most of his stuff behind). What are they going to do? Nag you about it? (that was "block" is for). Box it up and drop it off at your new place (that's one part of your problem fixed).
I wouldn't get too wrapped up in stuff - most things are pretty trivial (easy to replace for not a lot of money) and being "fast and light" when you need to be will far outweigh most stuff.
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u/purplevampireelefant 1d ago
We just got old furniture from my grandparents so we had to pack all stuff from our previous furniture (we sorted out 1-2 boxes with mixed stuff to give away) and are now unpacking.
The shelf looks so good now but we still have two or three cartons with our geeky stuff we had on display and want it again in the open but then it all would look worse now.... So it's in the boxes now, waiting for us to place it or so....
And in the other room we successfully unpacked half of the stuff to fill the cabinet but lost energy and in the end put many stuff back in the carton and other stuff just in the drawer.... Without sorting or anything.....
Problems for later.... We are tired
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u/Lisamausi 1d ago
I reorganized the living room (camping backpacks and equipment on the floors leaning against the walls, guitar equipment, some books). Most of (but not everything!) it went to the basement, because we will use it, but not in our current living situation. But now the basement is so full, I have to pull out boxes to get to the other stuff.
The apartment belongs to my partners mom, we are renting. She left quite a bit of her stuff in the basement too and ist stresses me out so much because we could really really use the space for our stuff.
We are living here about 3 1/2 years and she needed something from the basement one time. We could throw it all out, but it’s not ours :(
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u/logictwisted 16h ago
I finally worked up the energy to start going through the old CD collection and get rid of what I no longer want. Part of that was listening to a few CDs - my CD player hasn't been used in so long it's broken. Uug.
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u/EternityScience 1d ago
If I just buy more bins, they will cure me of clutter 😅
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u/purplevampireelefant 1d ago
Oh yes.... We bought more storage and bins too. It feels so nice to have a way to store all the stuff. I feel that but back in my mind I fear the day we have to move in an even smaller apartment...... So there is the permanent weight in me to at least sorting and organising the stuff in boxes and not just throw it in there to have it out of way and sight (but not out of the house)...
Man I need will and energy to do that.
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u/wafflefries-yo 1d ago
I just moved and got rid of SO much stuff before coming to the new place. But apparently didn’t get rid of enough. Now my new garage has boxes piled up with stuff I still don’t even want and I have to go through it all again. I also have this big decorative candle holder thing that’s too big to fit in my car, so I can’t drop it off at the donation center. I previously posted it on Marketplace for $10 and didn’t get any inquiries about it. I should probably just post it on there for free but really hate using FB at all and am just making excuses at this point. I also have a big old TV we use maybe once per year that’s just taking up premium space in the bedroom and makes me want to cry when I see it. Donation centers don’t want those. I also have way too much framed artwork that overwhelms me to the point I can’t get anything hung up. I’ve been working remote for 4.5 years and my lack of social skills makes me just hold onto this stuff instead of dealing with putting it on Marketplace. Anyway. Just venting. Thx for reading.