r/daddit • u/Beneficial-Dish-6521 • 1d ago
Discussion Babies are really annoying
Title might seem harsh, and let it be known that I LOVE my 6 week old son. I would do anything for him and readily rise up at my most tired to make sure he’s clean fed and healthy. I’d empty my bank account at a pin drop to make sure he’s healthy and not think twice.
But he is very annoying. The loud cries that turn him purple for the slightest inconvenience , keeping me up all night and forcing me to hold a siren directly to my face, the constant guessing what’s wrong, worrying about breathing and chest movement when really all he is doing is trying to pass some gas, he won’t take a bottle anymore for some reason, he overreacts, squirms and makes terrifying noises in his sleep, the list goes on.
I don’t even feel guilty about thinking my little cub is annoying. He isn’t supposed to be easy. I hear about people’s angelic perfect babies and don’t even get jealous, mine just kinda stinks at being a baby and that is okay.
If you kinda think ur baby is super annoying and don’t look foward to every second with them I think that is A-Okay. I’m not raising a baby, I am raising a man who just happens to be a baby right now. And I think it’s okay to let yourself feel annoyed.
I love this little baby but I fantasize everyday about him being older, and I see this as the trial I have to persevere through to get to my little man.
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u/WayfareAndWanderlust 1d ago
I think this is normal man. I mean person dependent of course but yeah, babies kind of suck. At least newborns do. Mine is 3 months today and the last month has been an absolute joy because his personality has started shining through more and more. Without a personality they are just little pudgy helpless shart machines. The personality helps a ton lmao
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u/SarmackaOpowiesc 1d ago
100%. Newborn phase is a slow slog you just got to get out of.
The real magic is when they start exploring the world.
Dad of 4 ✌️
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u/Beneficial-Dish-6521 1d ago
4 kids is impressive, you have definitely been blessed. I always wanted 4 myself and despite how much work my first one is he has not made me want any less!
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u/SarmackaOpowiesc 1d ago
I have a terrible memory when it comes to unpleasant experiences and I can't seem to remember the newborn phase much.
Cognitively I know it was terrible, I just have very few memories of it. Probably because sleep deprivation kills memory creation
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u/WayfareAndWanderlust 1d ago
We were home like 2 days with our newborn and I had made my mind up that I was one and done. Didn’t care if it cost me my marriage. That’s how much I thought the newborn phase sucked.
Now I see the appeal of having another and it’s really not been that much time in between. Crazy how rough that phase was for me (and presumably most).
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u/SarmackaOpowiesc 1d ago
My wife had an awful first delivery. 6 days in the hospital. I got out and had a high priority project on my plate. 100 hour weeks with a 2 WK old, barely functioning C-section Ed wife, and a fussy baby.
Wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy. Nearly zero memories of that time. I delivered the project, got a promotion and a nearly 150k raise out of it - but my recollection is mostly from journal entries
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u/Numerous_Ratio_6797 1d ago
the shart machine era is so real, wait till he starts giggling at his own farts and you forget how annoying the potato stage was
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u/Demoliri 2h ago
The first 3 to 4 months are the potatoe phase. Definitely the worst part of being a dad as you can't really do anything except change diapers. When they start to be able to react it gets a lot better, but when the teeth start coming, it can be hell.
Our second is 6 months now and teething like hell, lots of screaming at night. Our first was a nightmare at 7 to 9 months, often waking up over a dozen times per night. We started taking shifts and sleeping separately so at least one of us could sleep, hopefully number 2 won't be so bad...
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u/RustyPlastics 1d ago
I have a 4 month old and I totally agree with you. Babies do suck ass, I hate not having normal sleep anymore, the constant tiredness is really nagging on me, the regressions are just horrible.
I do love him with all my heart but he will never get siblings because I simply do not want to put up with all this stuff one more time
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u/Beneficial-Dish-6521 1d ago
Me and my sister are 8 years apart for that exact reason. We both had collic too
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u/TolMera 1d ago
Some of those things are not the norm - check his diet, he might have an intolerance.
Turning purple, or screaming when pooping are things that make me thing check if he needs a different diet.
The other stuff sounds consequential.
Also, buy some full ear headphones, noise cancelling, cheap enough - and wear them. Your hearing is important, as is your partner’s, and people don’t realize that lots of parents suffer real hearing damage holding a screaming baby.
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u/Beneficial-Dish-6521 1d ago
We’ve been to the doc so many times to see if he has the milk protein allergy, the crying is the same no matter what my wife eats. And he doesn’t cry when he passes gas or poops, just kinda wriggles and moves his belly in a way that makes it look like he’s having restricted breathing. Found that out after a costly emergency room visit. Like I said in my post, he’s just figuring it out and not having tbr easiest time with it.
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u/imtalkintou 1d ago
They are supposed to be annoying, makes them hard to forget!
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u/throwawaysmetoo 1d ago
Car: hey, don't forget to check your backseat!
Like, for demons or.....because right now I'm at the point where I'm already pretty certain there's something back there. Hey car, no ears?
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u/pimpinassorlando 1d ago
I hear about people's angelic perfect babies...
You are being lied to.
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u/SarmackaOpowiesc 1d ago
Sleep deprivation inhibits memory creation.
Less so being actively lied to and more they have fabricated memories for themselves. Human memory is really pliable it turns out
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u/THE_GREAT_PICKLE 1d ago
I got really lucky with my son. He has slept through the night basically since he was 3 months old (aside from feedings/changings). He’s an all around really chill kid, eats all his food, barely cries, etc. It’s about as perfect as you get. He’s 2 now and is still a model kid.
We decided to have a second, and my god is it different. Every great thing our son did, our daughter does the opposite. I still love her but she’s infinitely more difficult than our son. Our son is about as near perfect as you can get in terms of ease of care, but I realize that’s extraordinarily unusual, especially with first hand experience on the other side of the coin.
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u/BlaineTog 18h ago
My mom insists I and my sister were angel babies. The only reason I even slightly believe her is that she equally insists that my brother (the middle kid) was a terror, the pall of trauma washing over her face when she brings it up. My brother's always been close to her, too, so it's not like she's just favoring my sister and me; he's just always been the kind of person who's all up in his emotions.
I'm sure we were just angels compared to my brother's colicky nonsense, though.
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u/xylem-utopia 1d ago
I don't know. I have a 5 month old and he's slept through the night since like 2 months old My wife wakes up like once MAYBE 2 times max to feed him. He also doesn't cry to get attention he just kinda squacks and yells and makes cute noises (unless you ignore him long enough then he cries) I don't know what we did but I'm kind of afraid because it seems too good to be true lol
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u/CaptainMikul 21h ago
Just enjoy the fact you got an easy one.
It's pure luck of the draw and Im glad you drew good man.
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u/KarIPilkington 1d ago
I dunno like my 5 year old is more annoying now than when she was a baby. She slept on an almost perfect schedule back then. 2.5 hour nap, up for change, feed, burp, back to sleep and then a longer sleep at night. Lots of crying of course but if you go into parenthood not expecting to have a crying baby from time to time then that's on you really.
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u/NazzerDawk 16h ago
My youngest was a perfect baby. Quiet cries, very definite causes every time.
My oldest was a bit of a challenge.
But my middle child was a loud, angry baby.
Some babies just are not as bad as others, and some are truly a terror.
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u/tcastloo 1d ago
This is the most honest post I've read on here in months. My firstborn screamed for 4 hours a night every night for 3 months. Keep going, the other side is real.
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u/Chrizilla_ 1d ago
Yeah, the trenches suck. It’s normal. Baby stage is muuuch more fun from like 7-10 months.
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u/Junior_Syrup_1036 15h ago
11 months here and my entire day consists of not letting my child seriously injure herself ...
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u/Dustin_peterz 1d ago
Wait until you relate the behavior patterns of a baby to a full-grown adult. I just see these giant fucking babies everywhere now.
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u/Responsible_Milk2911 1d ago
Preach, dad. I remember mine being "annoying" for about 2 or 3 months. Around 3 months she smiled and the connection to her multiplied by a million. This little pink, screaming potato has a personality! Wooo!
Then it got better and better, but also hard and annoying, just in different ways. Just wait till people start buying you electronic toys or toys that squeak. Just wait till he asks questions. Its non stop but it changes constantly so at least its new, keeps you on your toes.
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u/ghos2626t 18h ago
You may want to sit down for this part. But toddlers, youth and teens are also annoying lol
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u/Rooster_CPA 20h ago
I agree man. Once my guy hit 3ish months, started to recognize me and smile. Everything got so much better for me internally, before it was like taking care of a poopy screaming potato. Now at 5 months he has a bit of personality showing through and I can't be around him enough.
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u/donlapalma 1d ago
Title should read "MY baby is annoying"
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u/Beneficial-Dish-6521 1d ago
Here’s the angelic baby parent I was talking about. I love my annoying baby and there’s nothing you can do about it
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u/likemyhashtag 1d ago
This is by design. Babies are technically born too early which is why they are so helpless. Something to do with our big ass brains and small hips of moms. They have to get them out before their heads get too big. I don’t know all the facts but some say the helplessness and annoyingness of babies helped us evolve into the humans that we are today.
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u/23andrewb 1d ago
Way back when, the babies that didn't cry and weren't annoying didn't survive. That's why.
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u/tuckernuts 1d ago
I'm at 10 weeks and the amount of people I heard/read at 6 weeks that were just like "hey tough it out it gets better" made me wanna drive into the ocean.. because my lil guy was a real pill at 6 weeks.
But now I'm at 10 weeks and we're sleeping almost 10 hours with one feed break at 6-8 hours. We're a very smiley baby and the times were fussy it's so much more bearable.
I'm not going to tell you that it'll be better soon, nobody's baby is the same. But when everyone is constantly telling you it gets better, they mean it. It'll come, and your little dude will be more and more fun everyday and it'll balance how annoying he can be.
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u/rrboosted1fiddy 23h ago
I’ve been there, wondering how I possibly could have ruined my life, my girl is now almost 2 years, it gets better and I know you’ve heard that, no matter how hard, that baby needs you, yes it can be tiring and exhausting, my suggestion is headphones, did wonders for me in the thick of it. Sooner than later you’ll be in aw of this little guy.
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u/Ratattack1204 1d ago
Pro tip for the night time. Inconsolable cries.
Get some noise canceling headphones. You can still hear the baby cry of course, and you can keep making efforts to help. But it really takes the grating, distressing level of piercing sound out of it. And if you’re there for ages, well. At least you can listen to a podcast or audiobook.
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u/Deku1205 1d ago
Just a song recommendation for sleeping/stress that worked my daughter. The Misty Mountains Cold. It works wonderfully
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u/flying_dogs_bc 1d ago
Oh fuck man BABIES SUUUUUUCK. They're an eating pooping puking bomb you have to diffuse multiple times an hour while its alarm is screaming full volume.
Kids are much more fun once they're past the potato stage.
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u/cdizzlePGA2k 14h ago
“The cries that turn him purple for the slightest inconvenience.”
My dude. He is coming online and becoming a person, everything is new, things are scary, he could be in pain, he could have a food allergy.
I know you’re venting here, and you’re welcome to, but none of this feels slight to the baby. He is doing his best, man!
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u/jennydb 1d ago
He is not annoying, he is a baby. This is how they communicate. They are not supposed to be super calm and adjust to parental routine in a few weeks. In modern society we try to force babies into a mold they don’t really fit
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u/CaptainMikul 21h ago
No, it's annoying.
It's okay to feel it's annoying. You're allowed to feel those emotions.
So long as you understand it's also not responsible for it, just let yourself feel things.
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u/flickthebutton 1d ago
You're not alone. Every baby is different. Mine was on call every 2 hours 24/7 for 3 months. Slightly less after that. Then lightened up after 6 months. He's 10 months now and crawling around. I just follow him with a coffee and baby proof what I need to. I do recommend a crash helmet from Amazon. Saved him a few times. https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B09NVRSB45?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share
Unfortunately he still wakes up every 2 hours. It can be very tough, and sleep debt is a real thing. Me and my partner have alternating nights now. I honestly don't know how I'm going to handle a second child.
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u/jthans07 1d ago
As a dad to a 3 year old, I'd take the newborn days back in a heartbeat. Love him to death, but holy god
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u/HonkinSriLankan 1d ago
Ya they are annoying as fuck but then they wrap their hand around your pinky finger and you enter nirvana briefly.
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u/Miserable-Rabbit3394 1d ago
As a father of a 3 year old, if you think it’s annoying now just wait…
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u/coldbeerandbaseball 1d ago
Completely agree, mine is 3 going on 4 months and I’m still completely baffled at people who say they adore babies. All they do is scream and poop, and you don’t have any time for yourself anymore ever.
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u/brokedownpalace11 1d ago
My daughter was very bad colic so I get it. It gets easier (and harder) but annoyances are always there. Good thing love is stronger. Hang in there
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u/sciencetaco 1d ago
Babies are annoying as hell. And the social structures we’ve built that tend to put 2 parents at home with the baby isolated from a “village” makes everything worse.
I had 2 babies. Thankfully they’ve both grown out of that phase. It’s not fun. They’re kids now with a whole new set of problems. But at least I have my 7-8 hours of sleep a night back! You will, too. One day. I promise.
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u/DanceWonderful3711 23h ago
My daughter is two and a half, my god the newborn phase seems easy now haha.
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u/Nsvsonido 22h ago
You should’ve taken holidays instead a baby if you wanted non-annoying. What did you expected? Is the first time you see one?
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u/AdAgile9604 22h ago
They all get better with time! One thing this thing has taught me is crazy patience
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u/mrcollin101 21h ago
Don’t forget the people that insist no matter how bad the moment is you will miss these days.
Thanks Dale, I know about nostalgia, but what I really need is 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep.
Fucking Dale.
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u/Stevie212 21h ago
Also at 6 weeks and couldn’t agree more. I wish I could give her to someone else to care for for the next 3 months and get her back after this phase has passed. A screaming potato with no emotion or personality is wearing on me
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u/ChillyTodayHotTamale 19h ago
Never got annoyed with my own kids. Having the empathy to know they have no clue and are just running a constantly overloaded sensory system helps. BUT, I am constantly annoyed by everyone elses. I LOVE my kids to death, I cant stand all the other children in the world.
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u/BlaineTog 18h ago
Get yourself some good noise-canceling headphones. They do a great job taking the edge off of being screamed at in the face. Obviously don't use the active noise-canceling when the baby's down for a nap but once you know they need something and have them in front of you, there's no further utility in hearing the screams.
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u/tubagoat 16h ago
Just wait till they turn 5 and are constantly yelling/howling and you have to repeat yourself 53 times to get them to put their second sock on.
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u/HandleZ05 15h ago
They are like that because in their experience which is none, the discomfort is one of the worse experiences in their life lol. Gets better. Routines help a ton. But there is no easy solution really. Just part of the process. But over time the bond will make it worth it
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u/allknowinguser 1d ago
2.5 months here. It gets a bit better day by day. Those initial months though, fucking rough.
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u/jb1million 1d ago
Take it from a guy who’s kids are 21, 18, 12 and 1. It’s not all sunshine and rainbows just because they’re older. My 1 year old is my favorite of my children right now.