My son is trans. He came out around age 11. I don't have a problem with that, in fact I was the one who suggested he transition. He told me that he didn't feel like a girl, and I told him to just try out living as a boy and if it didn't feel right he could just go back to how he was. He picked a new name, and that was that.

The thing I'm wondering about is that I have advised my son not to seek gender reaffirming care. To be clear, he has the final say in this. If he was like "I can't take this, I need gender reaffirming care" we would do it. But I'm terrified for the current political situation in the United States where we live. The Trump administration has already requested the medical records of every child in my state receiver gender reaffirming care. The state refused to provide it, but with the current supreme court I have no faith that if push came to shove the records could be kept from them. We live in one of the most progressive cities in a very progressive state, so while we haven't officially changed his name most of the institutions he has to deal with use his new name and not his dead name. I'm less worried about that, but procedures that produce medical records create a paper trail that I'm afraid will be harder to hide.

His gender identity seems to be more fluid (he prefers he/they pronouns) so thus far it hasn't been a big issue. That said I know that there are things he would like to change about his body. He hates his breasts, women in my family tend to have very large breasts and boy did he ever get that gene. When he first came out that wasn't even an option because he was so young, but he is 17 now so it's something that could happen. Same deal with hormone therapy, at the start of this when Biden was in office we did go to a gender clinic to talk about getting gender reaffirming care. He is scared of needles so he didn't want to do injections, and none of us were confident that he could use the gel options responsibly and regularly - so he decided that he wouldn't seek hormone therapy.

My son is autistic and has ADHD. The autism isn't severe, but at 17 he probably has the maturity of a 14 year old. He usually can't do more than 4 hours out in the world before he needs to hide in his room to recharge his social battery. He is highly dependent on me, if the fascists in charge of our country right now took him away he would not survive. I want him to be his authentic self - but I'm so scared that he will be hurt.

So my question - am I doing the right thing? I know that visibility is important, and that being out supports the community as a whole, but I just don't think he is strong enough to face that on his own without me to support him - and there has been plenty of talk on the right of taking trans kids away from their supportive parents. What I told my son is that right now we need to do what queer people have done since the beginning - hide. I hate it, but I feel like that's the reality we are in right now. He is 17, so in a year he will be making his own decisions - but I feel like he will still look to me for guidance. I just want to get the perspective of the trans community, because I don't know what is right anymore.

Hello everyone,

Since we are closing in on the midterms, I (28m) have been inundated by ads (as I’m sure everyone else has as well). Seemingly the biggest issue in all of the Republican ads I have to sit through is about Gender Reassignment Surgery on minors. The ads are obviously ridiculous and hyperbolic, almost to the point of caricature, but it made me realize that I do not actually know what the general view of the Trans community is on Gender Reassignment Surgery and minors. Is it generally viewed as something that should not be done before the age of 18, or is it something that should be readily available as an option? Is there a more nuanced position regarding this? I have read truly wonderful accounts of people who go through the procedure and feel complete happiness/satisfaction afterwards, and have thought that this could be something that could truly help many minors that are trans, but at the same time, it does seem like quite a big decision to make, and I know that at least for myself I would not be comfortable with my younger self making such a big decision. I am curious as to what the general community thinks of these things.

I’m sure that I could find these answers by looking it up, but I enjoy dialogue with people that have experienced/lived something that I have not. I hope that this post comes across as respectful, and that the questions I have raised are in good faith. If I have made any statements that are hurtful or appear to be in bad faith, please let me know. Thanks and I hope you have a wonderful day!

I was offered some very huge financial aid to go to school in boston (Fisher College) and i wanted to know how the enviornment is for transfems, and what things about the area should i know before hand

I am a teen girl, and I love being a teen girl, but I would give anything to be a boy. I have had gender dysphoria my whole life and feel absolutely awful every time I get reminded of being a girl.
But I am not at a place in my life where I can transition and I am not really interested in it. I have a very religious family and a promising future in ballet. I do not want to transition, but I need to get rid of my gender dysphoria ASAP. I really can’t continue like this and I don’t know what to do

I have a friend who said that even after they transitioned medically, they still dream of a pre-transition version of themselves. But then I have an older trans friend who says that they don’t dream that they are their older self. And I’m just curious what to expect when it comes to dreaming, as somebody who is starting their transition process soon.

For a little bit of context, i recently realized im nonbinary transmac (im AFAB).

I have 4 siblings whom I know are really open minded so I started thinking about coming out to them.

I tried to mention the topic of gender identity with one of my sister and she started talking about how genders are made up anyway and people should stop trying to feel "something" and just be themselves outside of labels.

I mentioned it with another one of my sister and I asked her how she thought our mom would react and she said that my mom also think that genders are bs anyway and we should just feel like ourselves because it didn't make sense "if you feel like a man does it means that you are going to start wearing blue?".

Some days ago I saw a post saying the same thing, that genders are a made up things and that its all stereotypes so you can't "feel like" a man because what we call a man is all stereotypes so why not just be yourself without a label.

I can "kinda" see what they are trying to say but it makes me feel a bit invalidating like I can't be trans and that if I wanna be more masculine "why dont you just dress/act more masculine without having to call yourself a guy bcs that's like saying you have to be a guy to be masculine and girls cant".

The truth is even if im a masculine girl I'll still be a girl to society and that's what I dislike. In fact I do like feminine things, its really the "being a girl" part that I dislike.

Im all about people dressing and being who they want but in this society isn't it a bit complicated to be your true self without no label at all?

Im not saying unlabeled people don't exist (they do and they are totally valid) but you can't dismiss someone gender identity bcs "genders are all made up anyway".

I don't know if what I said even makes sense or what I even want from yall ( probably just reassurance and validation tbh 😅) but I needed to vent to someone since apparently no one around me believes in labels....

Hi, my partner recently came out as trans, hasn’t told many people and I of course don’t want to out her. We live in her parents home and she doesn’t want to start using her new name and pronouns until after she starts HRT. For context her parents are not safe to tell and she wants to wait until we move out (either together or separately, unsure yet but will likely take 6 months or more)

I initially came across as unsupportive by accident but I am starting to get on board with everything that is going to change and I’m starting to feel really excited for her and our future together. Shes told me the name she wants to use. I’m worried that if I start using her name and pronouns that I may slip up in front of someone who doesn’t know. I really don’t want to out her or take any part of her journey away from her.

Is this a normal fear? Is it just anxiety? Should I ask her if I can keep using her deadname until we are somewhere safe?

I also just feel really uncomfortable using her deadname now. Is that normal at the start?

NSFW I guess

I am a trans man asking on behalf of my friend who is a trans woman. She is looking for something with good coverage and that helps with dysphoria while on a very long waiting list for bottom surgery. She has debilitating dysphoria and has given me permission to get her something if I find something helpful. Appreciate any leads!

I have POTS, a type of dysautonomia, caused by what my doctors think is hEDS, and my POTS specialist said to put off HRT for a while until I got my POTS under control, but it doesn't seem to be getting better and I'm approaching 20 faster than I'd like to be. Should I prepare myself for any negative changes caused by POTS interacting poorly with E and prog injections?

i am not trans, so forgive me if i use some terms incorrectly, but i have always been curious about this.

let's say you're on estrogen for a year. if you were to suddenly stop, what would happen? would your body gradually start to undo the changes? will there ever be a point where the changes are completely gone?

or perhaps, are the changes permanent?

i think i have this stuff ingrained in me and i’m not even aware of it happening

I'm trying to get on HRT and I'm just not really sure where to start. I would prefer going through doctors because my parents would be helping pay for it and I don't think they'd be cool with DIY, however my biggest fear going that route is that I'd end up getting prescribed a super low dose that does nothing and only causes more problems. Is there any solution here?

Heya, I was wondering if I could get some advice on ways to reduce my natural testosterone when I live in a state that restricts HRT access to minors (Fyi, I am 16).
As of now I identify as a Demi-boy (AMAB under He/They pronouns and questioning about MtF) and I kind of wanted a way of exercise or diet that could help with me building a more fem build over time before I have unrestricted access to HRT in order to maybe do a transition when I am older.
Any help I could get would be nice. Thanks!!!

This genuinely infuriates me to no end. Ive stopped boymoding ever now, so I mostly wear skirts, and the lack of pockets is honestly so inconvenient. Like I genuinely cant carry my phone, or store things after I buy them, or scratch my balls. This means I have to wear a handbag all the time, which is more inconvenient and harder to access, and I still cant scratch my balls. This was less bad when I was only girlmoding in school for a few years, because I had my backpack to carry stuff, but now that I wear skirts outside of school Ive realized how impractical they are. I know you can get skirts with pockets, and some of mine do, but they are pretty rare, and Im not gonna not buy a nice skirt just because it doesnt have pockets. I feel like this a severe flaw in design that should be changed. I literally dont see how its more aesthetic, since theyre barely noticeable, and it would make life much easier if they all just had pockets. Why do skirts not have pockets and does this also annoy you?

Hi! I'm not transgender or questioning my gender. I'm just genuinely curious about other people's experiences.
I've heard some transgender people describe feeling trapped in the wrong body, and I've always wondered what that actually feels like.
How do you know that what you're experiencing is related to your gender? What does that discomfort feel like emotionally or mentally? And how did you first realize that something didn't feel right?
I understand that not every transgender person experiences this feeling, and that everyone's experience is different.
I'm not asking to judge or challenge anyone's identity. I just want to understand something I've never personally experienced.

Edit: I just want to clear something up. I'm not a bot lol. I know my writing can be off sometimes, and I have trouble putting my thoughts into words in a way that makes sense. So I do use help with my grammar and making my questions more understandable, but the thoughts and questions are still my own.
I'm genuinely curious about people's experiences because this is something I've never really understood before.
I also want to say that nobody has to share anything personal with me. If you don't feel comfortable answering, that's completely fine. If you tell me to stop asking questions or just don't respond, I'll respect that and leave you alone.
I'm not here to pressure anyone or make them uncomfortable. I'm just trying to listen and understand something that's different from my own experience.
And thank you to everyone who has taken the time to share their stories with me. I really do appreciate it.

dr put me on this for 3 months until our next visit to start with. am i going to see any changes by then on this dose?? my friends all tell me its not a lot so idk what to do?

For context, I'm a 16m and have been questioning my gender for a few months now, and having some doubts about if I'm actually trans or just going through a phase.

Around 2 years ago I occasionally dressed up in female clothes when I get bored, but didn't think of wanting to be a girl back then. It's only recently that the thoughts crossed my mind, and since so many people knew they were trans or that they wanted to become a different gender when they were very young I'm having doubts about whether I'm actually trans or not. Also, I'm mostly fine being referred to as a male, where most people I've seen online hated that even before they transition. These thoughts also feel like they came out of nowhere. I never played with girly things when I was a kid and only recently wanted to do those kind of things. In fact, I used to dislike girly things when i was younger, so that makes me doubt myself even more.

I don't want to make a big decision like transitioning unless I'm very sure that I'm trans and that it's not just a phase, so I'm making this post for some advice that could help me find out about myself.

Okay so........here goes. I am a 35 year old cis man (hope I did that right) I grew up and am living in nw rural Ohio and have never really had much interaction with the LGBTQ community apart from my cousin who is gay. I am currently going through a separation from the mother of my children after 14 years together. And I guess I am just womdering if I am attracted to trans women or if I am fetishizing them. I really hope I am not because I don't wish to objectify anyone I just want help figuring it out. I have seen many trans women online and here on reddit that I find attractive. But I don't know if it is real, or if it is me enjoying the idea. A lot of them enjoyed the same things as I do. Anime, manga, scifi, horror. Again I hope I do not offend anyone I am just trying to learn about this and hopefully myself.

I'm planning on try to start HRT soon(ish), but I am horribly afraid of needles, and want to know if injection is required for her or if there are other options?

Hello,

Me and my girlfriend (she is trans), are moving in together soon :)

Super happy for us.

I'm making her a little "welcome home/care package" as she has had to drive multiple states for her next work assignment and for where we will be living. I had the idea to finish her package with cute cozy socks...

Now, the problem...

She is a shoe size 11 women, and today I went to two different stores, and they had no socks in her size...

Is this just a problem with women's clothing industry? I saw that size 11 is just like...a size large, but all of these socks said made for shoe size 4-10. Like wtf. Lol. I went to the plus size women's section and they don't even have socks there.

My girl doesn't want to wear anything for men, and rightfully so, so what gives on these sizes?

Anyhow, I had to hunt some down online and it was still a hassle but I think I found some good ones her size.

But I am just wondering in the future, do any of the dolls have advice on how to find clothing that fits? It would help for when I go and get her a gift. Thank you so much <3

So I may be starting HRT soon, by the end of the year if all goes well.

I'm just wondering if it's worth trying to get facial/body hair gone before I start it? I'm terrified of being a woman with a permanent 5 o'clock shadow. I can think of nothing worse. Is it worth putting off HRT until I can get all of that sorted out?

Also wondering if it's worth trying to get fitter before hrt? Will that make it work better? I'm not fat, but I'm not exactly fit either and I'm wondering if it's a good idea to try to lose the extra weight before HRT?

Weird anxious thought and curiosity.
Did your animals start treating you differently after starting HRT? I have a cat and a small dog who are my whole life and just got weirdly paranoid that they might be off put by scent or hormonal changes. Curious if this has any merit or if it’s just the evil anxiety monster lol. I’m more curious about testosterone but would be happy about any perspective.

Edited for typos lol