r/SubredditDrama • u/SilverSpooky extra salty • Jul 17 '15
The math doesn't add up in /r/okcupid when OP brings up looks, leagues, and dating up.
/r/OkCupid/comments/3dla7f/a_guy_who_is_a_7_in_real_life_is_what_on_okc_a/ct68p6v4
u/Nerdlinger Jul 17 '15
It really, really comes back to treating women as something other than human. They're a number, a varying degree of "fuckable" or "dateable" that gets catalogued away until the rest of the market is known. Evaluated like product for consumption based on market value. And that is poisonous and disgusting.
While I agree with the core idea here (especially the first sentence), I wonder how this guy decides who to message on OkC. Is it just the first "dateable" woman he sees? Does he find a group of dateable women and message them all? Or randomly select from that pool?
I'm guessing that he's implicitly ranking them on some scale, even if he is loathe to assign a number to it.
It's one thing to treat people as little more than numbers, but it is another to try to quantity certain aspects of them.
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u/Nurglings Jul 17 '15
You mean you aren't supposed to just send a message out to everyone in your zip code?
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u/AndyLorentz Jul 17 '15
Does OkC limit you to messaging only one at a time? The whole point of online dating is you presumably have a relatively huge pool, and you can narrow down who you want to date based on their responses to your messages.
So, I'd imagine if this guy is smart, he sends messages to all of the women he finds attractive, and goes from there.
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u/criswell Jul 17 '15
Yeah, I don't have a severe facial flaw, lol. I'm talking people with major over or under-bites, crooked smiles, bad teeth, gummy smiles. Bad skin
Ah, to be twenty again.....
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Jul 17 '15
crooked smile
severe facial flaw
Lol, weren't millions of teen girls swooning over Edward Cullen's infamous crooked smile a decade ago?
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u/buartha Jul 17 '15
I've just read a decent amount about how much more important looks are to men than women, and that once a woman likes a guy's personality, she is much more attracted to him physically
Thank God OP has such a winning personality then...
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u/E-Rok Jul 17 '15
Obviously he has a great personality, I mean look no further than this gem:
I'm highly educated, have done a lot in my life, and make a lot of money with a huge amount of free time
I mean, he seems incredibly interesting! What else do you need to know! Hobbies, interests? Pshaw. Having an education and a life and an income are so rare (and don't forget his special ingredient, entitlement)...ladies, snap this one up!
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Jul 18 '15
Ah, the resume game, where things mean other things!
I'm highly educated (Bachelor's degree)
have done a lot in my life (Went to Vegas and got a lapdance once)
and make a lot of money (Arby's is giving me tons of hours!)
with a huge amount of free time (But my schedule's getting reduced next week)
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u/out_stealing_horses Jul 17 '15
I want to get dates with women more attractive than me. I would put myself at a 6 or 7 for looks, and I want to date 7's or 8's. It's probably not a popular opinion on reddit, but I'm highly educated, have done a lot in my life, and make a lot of money with a huge amount of free time, so I'm looking for someone who brings a lot to the table too.
Assuming the self assessment is accurate - he's at least got an understandable wish list, even if it is pretty Pollyanna.
I guess I'm thinking more along the lines of Millionaire Matchmaker. Ever seen that show? The guys there are paired with very beautiful women that have a lot going for them
This is where things start to get weird. I'm pretty sure the concept of the matchmaking show is that Person A seeking "a relationship" is often gigantically stunted either socially or emotionally, and has to be profusely coached toward how to act and appear around other human beings of the same/opposite sex. And the bevy of willing "dates" are not exactly upwardly mobile SVP's taking a break from ball-busting on the trading floor to get a blow out and pose seductively for the camera. A great deal of them are just out for your typical aimless trophy wife/stunted husband deal.
If he thinks stuff like that plays as well in real life as it does on a highly edited, pseudo scripted reality show, he's in for a bad time.
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u/mrgoodnighthairdo Jul 17 '15
The number system is so cumbersome, and rather arbitrary if you ask me. I prefer to rate people based on the letter-grade system. It's much more objective, and plus you have the option of bumping a bitch up a grade if she does her extra credit and shit.
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u/TheSaintJimi Jul 17 '15
No no no you have to equate them to movies. Like if a girl is horrible then she is a Daredevil but if the same girl turns out to be wealthy than suddenly she's a Daredevil Director's Cut! The gold standard of course is Empire Strikes Back.
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u/E10DIN Jul 17 '15
I'm personally a fan of the reduced number system. 0 is incredibly unattractive, 1 is would consider, 2 is yes, 3 is smoking hot.
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Jul 18 '15
and plus you have the option of bumping a bitch up a grade if she does her extra credit and shit.
Forreal, dude may be at a B- but if he eat the booty like groceries, he'll get bumped to a A++
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u/blahdenfreude Jul 17 '15
Maybe they're able to quickly surmise what a colossal ass-hat he is?
He doesn't take much care to hide it in that conversation over there.
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u/geargirl Jul 17 '15
Just wait until he discovers TRP. Monster in the making right there.
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u/Moritani Jul 18 '15
I went on a date with a guy like that. Dude was loaded, average looks and arrogant as fuck. There was no second date.
I like how he says personality is going to win over those 8s and 9s and make him more attractive but by "personality" he clearly means "cash."
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u/Georgia-OQueefe Jul 18 '15
The whole scale of attractiveness and using that as a decision on who to pursue is kinda gross to me. Not only is it arbitrary and kind of objectifying of everyone but it doesn't take personality, interests, or whether or not the person is a good person or not. I don't care if I net a 9.65, if they're a shitty person then I'm in a relationship with a shitty person regardless of their good looks
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u/arkansastraffic Jul 17 '15
Or maybe you aren't getting dates because your personality is toxic waste and you're making it a lot more complicated than it actually is!
Reading his responses makes me think he has honest to God autism (not the petty insult version of autism, the real thing).
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u/fuckthepolis2 Jul 17 '15
For future reference, this doesn't count as your teachers being right about you needing to know math outside of math class.