Well done, /r/holidaybullshit! You solved the puzzle and so here are your prizes.

[u/jsdillon]

First off, congratulations to /u/Lets_Go_Flyers for solving the last piece of the puzzle. As the grand prize winner, he will get:

• A check for $1000
• A grabbag (grabcrate?) of some of our favorite comedy books (including some of the webcomic artists that helped us with the Funny Pages) and some of our favorite board and card games
• A copy of every product we make, including a signed copy of the Bigger, Blacker Box.
• A celebratory bottle of fancy booze (if you're over 21)

Of course, /u/Lets_Go_Flyers wasn't working alone. We'd like to reward four of you who made major breakthroughs:

• /u/icing9 for find the prime numbers in the timestamps.
• /u/ewige for decoding FEEL FOR GREEN.
• /u/sethchas for figuring out to get braille out of the lights.
• /u/zapbark for also figuring out the braille and, more importantly, for finding B AND W DOT COM using the braille numbers as a book cipher into the CAH free PDF.

You will each get:

• A check for $250
• All the other stuff /u/Lets_Go_Flyers gets.

You all should PM me with your address and alcohol preferences (if you're over 21).

So, where does that leave the rest of you? After all your hard work and crazy theories, we definitely don't want those of you contributed to this subreddit to go home empty-handed. So, we'd like to send you a copy of our rare Reject Pack, 24 cards too weird for Cards Against Humanity, that we don't sell anywhere. Just sign up using this google form.

It was really cool to watch you all come together to work on our puzzle. We hope you had fun. We're certainly happy that we can put all this Holiday Bullshit behind us.

Look for a full write-up on our blog, in the coming weeks.

-CAH

[u/tobakett]

Well done everyone! I doubt I contributed enough, but I submitted a form just in case. Seriously glad to see such great prizes for the top 5 guys....and this was a crazy hard puzzle and those breakthroughs were really mind-boggling.

Though, if I may petition, maybe CAH could send a little something extra to the page creator and mods who have done a butt ton of work to let all of us work on this together? Anyone with me on that?

[u/jsdillon → u/tobakett]

Good call! I just bought all the moderators a year of reddit gold. Thanks so much for all of your hard work, especially in enforcing the no-personal-info rule.

Also, mods should definitely sign up to get a free reject pack.

[u/scratchdump]

Heya CAH guys and gals. Your Google Docs form is missing a City field. Sure you could deduce it from the zip but figured it makes life easier if that was on there somewhere.

[u/jsdillon → u/scratchdump]

Fixed. Thanks.

[u/Lets_Go_Flyers]

Wooooooooooooooooooooot!!! Thank you thank you, thank you!

[u/socki03]

Ho. ly. Shit. Congrats guys!

Also, I think I can speak for u/Lets_Go_Flyers when I say "Reddit gold for everyone!" (kidding)

[u/photosbydash]

CONGRATS TO THE BIG 5 WINNERS>>> AND EVERYONE INVOLVED!

[u/[deleted]]

Great Prizes! Congrats to the top four MVPS! And thanks CAH- this will forever be the best $12 bucks I ever spent. :)

[u/enragedgnome]

Thank you, CAH team, for putting up with our bullshit and generally being awesome!

Also thanks to all the awesome people on this subreddit for helping solve this puzzle!

[u/kuhanluke]

Oh darn. I frequented this sub and tried to see if the clues took me anywhere, but never posted because I never had a theory or a solution, even though I spent a futile two hours following the "letters on every envelope?" clue. Oh well. No Reject Pack for me.